Non-diver spouse??!!

[rhyz]

I've just recently gotten the diving bug, certified as of July 30th of 2006 and have 29 dives in so far. My deepest to date is the Oriskany at 135fsw. All I read about and think is when and where can I dive next. I fortunate that I work at home doing my custom woodworking and daytrading and am able to do my passion atm. I make decent money and as of late spend it mostly on diving.

But the wife isn't a diver nor will she ever be, she hates the water and things under the water. But lately my diving has gotten in her way it seems. I just returned from a 2 week vacation from Florida diving the Oriskany and a cple other wrecks off of Clearwater and am now going on a cruise Oct 1st. I'm diving 3 of the 4 island we spot at including PR from which we depart. She wants to do booze cruises and crap I could care less about and the normal crowd we cruise with isn't going this trip. Basically it's all her younger friends (30 and below) that are going. Party guys of which I really dont want to do, I'd rather dive.

So my question is how do most of you handle a non-diving spouse? Or justify your diving time? For me, it kinda bothers me, but not going into a whole lot of crap I would rather dive the half day then meet up with them later. For me I would rather see something unique than just spend the day drinking and miss a whole lot of wonderful sights U/W.

Edited: I quess it's a basic scuba question.....

 

[Diveral]

Same problem except my wife isn't the partying type. Unfortunately I don't have as much time or disposable cash to take advantage of as many diving opportunities as you do. I get a 1 week trip a year and a couple of weekends for exclusive diving. I can usually hit a local quarry for a couple of hours without any problems. When I go to the Keys or the Florida Panhandle she usually goes along and I get to dive about 1/3 as much as I would if she weren't along. Then we do other interesting things together.

As for cruises check out some of windjammer type diving cruises in the Virgin Islands. She may be interested in those. Also these are available in the South Pacific. Also if you check your Cruise Ships carefully you can find some cruises to places like Cozumel or Belize that have a higher number of dives scheduled than others. That way she gets the type of cruise she likes and you get to go on more dives than the typical party boat type cruises.

Good Luck

AL

 

[Jamie_r]

Divorce........................... just kidding

 

[rhyz]

LOL Jaime that was the crap I was staying away from....counseling anyone?

 

[Divmstr223]

This is how I deal with it....I go diving, come home and get the evil eye and silent treatment. It passes eventually...then repeat process the next time.

It's not so bad once you get used to it...

 

[3ddiver]

I earn my diving money by cutting grass and odd jobs this way my "fun" money isnt coming out of my paycheck. This helps out but does not totally eliminate the problem. I dive every week at a local lake and that is not too much of a problem but I also go to Florida for a week with my buddies and this is more of a problem. We have to do a "family" vacaition also. My wife is a little more understanding because she does like the water. I just figure that I have to live my life also and this is part of my life.

 

[tlawler]

Divorce........................... just kidding

May sound funny, but that's what I did. My first wife didn't hate the water, but absolutely refused to even try scuba. I only dove 5 or 6 times a year on average for the 12 years we were married and she gave me no end of grief over how much time and money (even though I did side jobs to earn my dive money) I spent on it. Our vacation times were HELL. Finally got rid of her and found someone who loves to dive (even if she doesn't quite share my obsession with it), and we are living happily ever after. It may sound corny, but there is a Bible verse that goes something like: make sure you and your spouse are equally yoked...as in similar likes and dislikes, similar views on religion and politics...etc. Wish I'd paid more attention to that before I got married the first time. I feel like I wasted 12 years...but I'm sure making up for them now.

 

[Meister481]

I'm in the same situation, wife doesn't dive and she works 70 hours a week. I find it useful to bribe the wife in advance. I'm talking about a day at the spa, a night out or something she really enjoys. I always invite her to go and if she declines, it's on her. Our two young children keep her pretty busy so she rarely takes me up on the offer unless it's at a park or there's family nearby. I have been working on her to start snorkeling on the day before we leave from vacation (no fly time). My best advice is to be happy and upbeat for a few days after the dive and make sure she knows you appreciate her letting you go. (regardless if you asked or not)

 

[Chocoholic]

I've just recently gotten the diving bug, certified as of July 30th of 2006 and have 29 dives in so far. My deepest to date is the Oriskany at 135fsw. All I read about and think is when and where can I dive next. I fortunate that I work at home doing my custom woodworking and daytrading and am able to do my passion atm. I make decent money and as of late spend it mostly on diving.

But the wife isn't a diver nor will she ever be, she hates the water and things under the water.

Welcome to the club! My husband is a non-diver but likes to golf, so that works for me. I still end up not diving quite as much as I would like to, but it is a give and take situation. OUr most recent trip he was sick and stayed in bed half the day, so I would go diving. One thing I found helpful was to go to a place where the diving is close so that I can go out and dive just one dive then come back and see what's up and dive the second dive if I want to. Basically so that I am not wasting time in the boat, I am just diving then going back and spending time with him

 

[rhyz]

Yeah I'm trying to justify the fact that I'll be back around 1pm with lots of time to spend with her and her friends..even if they are totally drunk at that time. For most of the ports of call we're there till atleast the earliest of 6pm...latest 10pm. I quess she thinks I'm just blowing her friends off and being anti-social. It's not like I'm missing "quality time" with the wife.