Thankfully, all four divers came back out of the hole ...

[Arizona]

I did not write anything about entry, but rather staying together on the line. The point being buddies need to maintain contact. Poor vis or silt puts it to the test. The allure of a wreck can be very attractive and make a buddy forget to look back similar to the experience of your wife perhaps.

Safe diving,

Arizona

 

[highdesert]

I did not write anything about entry, but rather staying together on the line. The point being buddies need to maintain contact. Poor vis or silt puts it to the test. The allure of a wreck can be very attractive and make a buddy forget to look back similar to the experience of your wife perhaps.

Safe diving,

Arizona

Point taken ... like I said earlier, my wife can "dawdle" behind the group, or just behind me. It's a situation I am no longer comfortable with, particularly when the viz is low, as was the case on some of our dives in RA. So while she is a conservative diver, she is at times too stubborn and independent, regarding buddy type issues. One thing is that all of our diving is on trips to other areas, where diving is always in a group with a guide, which means 2-6 divers plus guide. She likes to stay away from getting kicked in the face, etc, by other divers, and so do I, but she has a tendency to lag back more. If we're diving in an interesting area with a good guide, I want to be able, if I choose, to see what the DM points out. Not that I'm going to hover over the DM, I just want to be in contact, unless I'm watching my air and want to stay above the DM (meaning on wall dives). So the issue is, where do she and I meet in the middle, so we're both OK with it?

 

[Arizona]

You could try navigating just the two of you on a more familiar site. Are you good with navigation? I find the best dives the ones I am just with another diver as we tend not to scare critters away and can move at our own pace. On a LA with new sites this may not be the best course of action, but perhaps this something you can work on.

A good way of looking at things is to think how close you need to be to initiate alternate air source breathing if you needed to.

 

[String]

I replied it had nothing to do with that ... that you NEVER, EVER enter an unfamiliar overhead environment like that without training and equipment. It got real quiet.

"YOU". You should have replaced that with an "I". Anyone else is entitled to dive whatever and however they want so stop trying to force your views onto them.

 

[highdesert]

You could try navigating just the two of you on a more familiar site. Are you good with navigation? I find the best dives the ones I am just with another diver as we tend not to scare critters away and can move at our own pace. On a LA with new sites this may not be the best course of action, but perhaps this something you can work on.

A good way of looking at things is to think how close you need to be to initiate alternate air source breathing if you needed to.

I'd say we're both decent with navigation, but for us, located where we are, there are no "familiar sites". Diving for us involves a long trip to an unfamiliar location, where we dive in new surroundings with a local guide. Though I can ay that once we're there, we do pretty well staying close on unguided house reef dives, etc.

I totally agree with your point about being within reach of a buddy's octo, which is my best line of reasoning when talking with my wife.

 

[TSandM]

highdesert, I had the exact same problem with my husband when I was a new diver. I wanted to stay with the guide, for a couple of reasons. One, he knew where we were going (and we usually didn't), and two, he found cool stuff I otherwise missed. But my husband wanted to be at the back of the pack with his camera, and dawdle, and wander off . . . It made me completely crazy, and we had some significant fights about it. They slowly resolved, as I got more confidence and wasn't so worried about staying with the guide every minute, and my husband got into a bit more team-oriented spirit of diving (although we still dive with him setting the pace and course with the camera, for the most part, and me doing the monitoring).

I don't know of any way to resolve the issue quickly or amicably. My husband and I basically didn't dive together, except on trips, for almost six months, until we each evolved a little way toward the other and could buddy up without as much stress.

 

[highdesert]

"YOU". You should have replaced that with an "I". Anyone else is entitled to dive whatever and however they want so stop trying to force your views onto them.

And does that include my buddy? Should I tell my buddy I have no problem with them endangering themselves due to their ignorance, while at the same time leaving me buddyless if I have an emergency? Are the lessons of every instruction agency, regarding cave diving, only their way of saying, "Here's what we like to do when we dive ... you feel free to do whatever?" I would personally not want to be on the receiving end of that kind of instruction, nor dive with a buddy who follows that line of reasoning. I have no issue with divers who want to go solo, if they have the experience to do so, but if I am diving with a buddy, I have a serious interest in how and where they dive.

 

[diver 85]

So, you were 20' from them with a light???.....I would venture to say what you have described happens many times every day--I know it's happened to me many times----and 99.99999% 'come home---alive & well', I'll take those odds any day.......I'm thinking the DM knew exactly what he was doing.....Also remember, on EVERY dive there are inherent risks--it's the nature of the sport......

 

[highdesert]

So, you were 20' from them with a light???.....I would venture to say what you have described happens many times every day--I know it's happened to me many times----and 99.99999% 'come home---alive & well', I'll take those odds any day.......I'm thinking the DM knew exactly what he was doing.....Also remember, on EVERY dive there are inherent risks--it's the nature of the sport......

They were maybe 20' from me with a light ... I didn't have one. I could see a light beam through the silt, but couldn't really see the source. Sorry, maybe good enough for you, but not for me.

 

[Jim Ernst]

You did the right thing...

Kudos to you for that.

I would NOT have gone in and I would not ever lead someone else into that type of situation as your dive guide did, That is how guides get people killed!