@maybepossibly Don't be embarrassed, you're not the first or the last person to have difficulty getting comfortable underwater.
My husband is a strong swimmer and loves the water and he took to it very quickly but I was very nervous at first, and I had problems with ear clearing and buoyancy. He was patient and supportive and eventually I started to feel comfortable - and that is a big part of the solution - feeling comfortable and confident. If this is truly something that you want to do then hang in there, keep trying, and look for an instructor that will work with you and be patient and supportive. Good luck!
My husband is a strong swimmer and loves the water and he took to it very quickly but I was very nervous at first, and I had problems with ear clearing and buoyancy. He was patient and supportive and eventually I started to feel comfortable - and that is a big part of the solution - feeling comfortable and confident. If this is truly something that you want to do then hang in there, keep trying, and look for an instructor that will work with you and be patient and supportive. Good luck!