Wife will not let me dive without a dive master..

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When my wife sighs about me going to the lake to dive solo I like to remind her of our overzealous life insurance policies. She doesn't find the humor in it that I do.
However life is all about compromises and she has learned to live with it as I tell her every time that she is welcome to come with me and I will gladly buy her the drysuit of her choice to help her brave the 40 degree water. She has yet to take me up on it.
 
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Hey all!

So my wife, friend and I were OW certified last year and i have gone on 4 dives since my checkouts. For some reason she has it in her head that something will happen to me so she refuses to let me dive in the local quarrys without a dive master. Even though I will be diving with a buddy. Have any of you dealt with this? Any tips?

She is worried, which is not an altogether "bad" thing (she loves you), but this is something the two of you will need to work through.

A dive master may actually provide some good mentoring to help develop your basic skills further, but the presence of a dive master will not automatically make the dive "safer" or protect you from yourself. And not all dive masters are created equal. A "zero-to-hero" DM would not necessarily be my 1st choice as a mentor....

And really, you should already be perfectly "safe" diving in conditions similar to those in which you were certified.

The "training wheels" (with regard to your wife's concern and restrictions placed on you) will need to come off fairly soon, or you will not be able to advance with your diving.

Again, this is something for the two of you to work out, and not something a bunch of strangers on the internet can help with.

My wife has on occasion expressed concern with me solo diving. I've solo'ed for well over 30 years, but do try to do most dives with buddies, and she is my main dive buddy.... I don't take her concern as a "negative".

But she also did not say "I will not let you go solo diving".

I hope all this works out so that both if you are happy with the outcome.

Best wishes.
 
When my wife sighs about me going to the lake to dive solo I like to remind her of our overzealous life insurance policies. She doesn't find the humor in it that I do.
However life is all about compromises and she has learned to live with it as I tell her every time that she is welcome to come with me and I will gladly buy her the drysuit of her choice to help her brave the 40 degree water. She has yet to take me up on it.

My idea was another million dollars of life insurance. Although my father-in-law told me that you should be careful not to be worth more dead than alive!
 
My wife also recently expressed concern. I have been diving for 30 years and technical since 2004. A couple of weeks ago she suddenly started saying that I needed to replace the 'old junk'.

She has no idea how risky my diving is but she wants me ti be safe.
 
My idea was another million dollars of life insurance. Although my father-in-law told me that you should be careful not to be worth more dead than alive!

Actually between the policies on the two of us I'd be more worried about our kids offing us.
 
My wife also recently expressed concern. I have been diving for 30 years and technical since 2004. A couple of weeks ago she suddenly started saying that I needed to replace the 'old junk'.

She has no idea how risky my diving is but she wants me ti be safe.

You are indeed "blessed" with a wonderful wife.

The rest of us struggle to justify new gear purchases.... :wink:

Best wishes.
 
So why have you not invited the wife along to dive with you? I would suggest she come along and dive along with the knuckleheads your are going to dive with at the quarry. If see does not want to dive still have her come along to at least meet said knuckleheads. Perhaps she could man the grill and have beers ready.
 
Hey all!

So my wife, friend and I were OW certified last year and i have gone on 4 dives since my checkouts. For some reason she has it in her head that something will happen to me so she refuses to let me dive in the local quarrys without a dive master. Even though I will be diving with a buddy. Have any of you dealt with this? Any tips?

If it's like most scuba diving lakes / quarries there are going to be LOTS of instructors and DM's there. At the local dive lake around here, in the summer there are probably 200 students and probably 20-50 instructors and DM's out there. Would that suffice? Just try to go somewhere there are classes going on.

In fact when I was assisting with a rescue class, I got almost got rescued twice before the student found and rescued me. While I think you could die, if you've got a dive buddy, it's highly unlikely.

Or you could take up motorcycle riding (I do both) and see what she thinks is safest. My wife of 28 years much prefers me to go diving.

Jim
 
For some reason (...) she refuses to let me dive in the local quarrys without a dive master. Even though I will be diving with a buddy. Have any of you dealt with this? Any tips?

When I was certified as an CMAS P1 diver (owd equiv.) a few years back, CMAS required that new divers dived with a more experienced buddy. Just like your wife now requires. Her requirement is thus not completely unwarranted. The reason for this is that the risk is high when you are a new diver, and if something happens, then you really want someone that can help and not just watch.

I did not follow that rule -> Numerous small incidents. Some were quite bad. Little help.

You may choose to dive with another inexperienced diver, but then you must accept the fact, that if something happens the buddy is less ready to help. And some things do happen, so be carefull.

One option, that might make your wife happier, would be to get a third experienced diver as a guide. An added benefit from a more experienced diver is that (s)he probably knows the site and can show nice places and that mentoring is also priceless. You may not need a dive master, but it would help to have a buddy that has done a lot of well planned dives...
 
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Just my $0.02 - there needs to be a conversation and it shouldn't be done in such a way where you're trying to convince her to "let" you go diving. I would approach this conversation with an attitude of trying to understand the concern. There's a lot of speculation here as to what the concern is, but in reality only she truly knows. Ask her why she's concerned and listen to her response. Once you understand why she's concerned then you can take a minute and think through it and address the response.

If she's concerned with your skill then that's something you can work on with a DM. If she's concerned with depth or time or who you're diving with, etc. you can address each of these items. The point is, learn what her concern is, think about it to see if it changes your mind and then address it in a thoughtful manner.
 
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