Solved: LGBTQIA people. Is there a need for a sub-forum?

[El Hefe 612]

Okay… First, I know I'm new here. Second, I'm genuinely curious. And third, I read the entire 18-page thread of the "LGBTQ Divers?" question. As a openly gay, married man I would love to have a place to connect with other gay men, women, and like-minded individuals to discuss dive travel opportunities, to find dive buddies without having to worry about whether or not they might have a problem with me, and to feel comfortable talking about things that might impact us.


If possible, I'd like to have a board created under Non-Geographic Clubs called:


LGBTQIA Divers and Their Friends


I have spent the past week-and-a-half searching the internet (and this board) for such clubs, and I was surprised how lacking they were. It's been six years since the original question was posted in the thread referenced above. I know if I'm interested, that there are probably many others who would be too, but they may just be afraid to ask. Many of the responses in the thread above were not very understanding of what it is like living as an LGBTQIA individual in a predominantly heteronormative global society. Having such a space is not about excluding anyone, it's about having space where we don't have to worry about being who we are and can focus on what we love - diving (among many other things).


Thanks!

 

[Storker]

If any one wants to be accepted as equal (I don't understand why not) it is much wiser to integrate rather than to deliberately stand out. Every one is different. So what?

Because if you're gay (or L,B,T, Q, I or A, I guess), you'll never know if someone gives you the stinkeye just for showing the same type of affection towards their partner as I can show towards my wife without anyone batting an eyelid. Some people don't give a crap about reactions like that, others care. I'm pretty certain I would find it uncomfortable. If you're of the latter category, you might want to spend some of your free time in an environment where you can be fairly certain to avoid that stinkeye. And I'm not talking about tonsil-licking making out of the "get a room, you guys!" category, I'm talking about holding your partner's hand, giving them a hug or a chaste peck on the chin, or just mentioning them in a casual conversation about what you did last weekend.

I find it rather telling that even in a work environment as progressive as mine, several of my gay colleagues seem a lot more reluctant to talk about their SO than I am to talk about my wife. I wouldn't be surprised if that's a learned behavior caused by the aforementioned reaction.

 

[Lorenzoid]

If any one wants to be accepted as equal (I don't understand why not) it is much wiser to integrate rather than to deliberately stand out. Every one is different. So what?

My impression is that those of us who are not in whatever group we're talking about have never stood in their shoes, and so as much as we may try to understand, we never REALLY will. My inclination is to think the same way--integrate and educate rather than segregate and mystify--but I am willing to admit I cannot truly see it from their perspective. If a group wants their own space because they feel that is what works best for them, I do not have enough perspective to be able to question it.

 

[tilikum]

That's probably the best answer so far. We simply do not see the world through their perspective.

 

[JohnnyC]

I don't see a need because I tend to think that whatever the question, it would get more attention in a specific forum, i.e. "I want to go to Indonesia to dive with my significant other, btw we're gay, will we have any issues," going into the Southeast Asia section, but I'm not gay, so I can't even imagine the myriad of other factors that may go into even a basic question like that. That being the case, I voted for not seeing it as necessary, but no objection to having the forum. While that very may well be a tacit "yes" vote, I think it's important to vote honestly.

Maybe it's just a hope that it's unnecessary, and we'll (society) get there eventually. Where you stick your dick or how you buff your muff has nothing to do with whether I'll dive with you, especially if you're the one buying the deco beers.

 

[Doby45]

buying the deco beers

You had me at deco beers..

 

[Kharon]

If a group wants their own space because they feel that is what works best for them, I do not have enough perspective to be able to question it.

You cannot both isolate and integrate. You have to choose.

 

[Kharon]

I find it rather telling that even in a work environment as progressive as mine, several of my gay colleagues seem a lot more reluctant to talk about their SO than I am to talk about my wife.

That's a damned shame. I will never understand the species.

 

[Lorenzoid]

You cannot both isolate and integrate. You have to choose.

It seems to me that from a practical standpoint that's what JohnnyC's post above is getting at. Since we generally don't allow cross posting, one must choose a forum in which to post a question. I suppose it depends what the poster wants to emphasize.

Does the poster want to convey being "a gay diver going to Indonesia"?

Or does the poster want to convey being "a gay diver going to Indonesia"?

I suppose this dilemma is not new to them, though.

 

[Kharon]

Does the poster want to convey being "a gay diver going to Indonesia"?

Or does the poster want to convey being "a gay diver going to Indonesia"?

I kind of get that - but ... I think it should be "a gay diver going to Indonesia". No special emphasis on either. In other words: I'm gay headed for Indonesia. What can I expect. Same as I'm an older male (or younger female or disabled vet) traveling to Indonesia. Maybe I'm being a polyanna. This divisiveness sux. It shouldn't exist here.

I just heard the most disturbing story on the news. There is a child that has always gravitated toward everything feminine - from birth. At 6 or so the child, when asked what (s)he wanted for christmas, (s)he replied "Can Santa Clause make me a girl". The mother replied, "Oh honey, we can shop for that right now".

What disturbs me about this? First that I have to put paren's around the "s" in she to convey this (she is a she not a he). But vastly more disturbing is the number of people who are protesting and lobbying with the argument that the person is too young to make a choice.

WTF - What choice? This little person has been a girl since birth. What is there to understand??? There is no choice being made by this little girl. She just wants the body she deserves. She is unencumbered (yet) by any socialization crap. She just doesn't understand why she can't be the way she should be. And this society is going to object? Has any right to object????????????

This whole issue needs to be in view until it no longer causes any notice. People are who they are. Sexual orientation is such a miniscule part of life. There just ain't no "us and them".

End of (off topic) rant.

 

[divad]

People are who they are. Sexual orientation is such a miniscule part of life. There just ain't no "us and them".

So we can add an S(traight) to the acronym and just be People of ScubaBoard. OK.