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Death of my Son, I need some help

Discussion in 'Passings' started by Superlyte27, Jan 31, 2019.

  1. The Chairman

    The Chairman Chairman of the Board

    # of Dives: I just don't log dives
    Location: Cave Country!
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    When you're ready, lets go not blow bubbles.
     
    ChuckP and Bob Evans like this.
  2. JahJahwarrior

    JahJahwarrior Solo Diver Staff Member

    # of Dives: 500 - 999
    Location: West Palm Beach, Fl
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  3. Queen Triggerfish

    Queen Triggerfish Barracuda

    # of Dives: 500 - 999
    Location: Twin Cities, Minnesota
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    Somehow stumbled upon this thread, and I'm yet another one who has never lost a child.

    I lost my father and my best friend within 12 months of each other, and it was incredibly hard. I bet that's like a walk in the park compared to losing a child. My greatest solace was the wonderful relationships that I had with both of them - that brings me so much peace even now, 8+ years later. While devastatingly heart-breaking, it was also heart-warming to read about the great relationship you and your son had. It brought me hope that those memories will bring you peace someday.

    Anyhow, take it or leave it. I hope today is better than a couple weeks ago. But if it's a horrendous day, print this out and burn it and if that helps even a tad, great. I pretty much just wanted you to know that there are still complete internet strangers who are heart-broken for you, and wishing you all the best.
     
  4. DrRobb

    DrRobb Angel Fish

    # of Dives: 500 - 999
    Location: Tulsa, OK
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    The Chairman likes this.
  5. divad

    divad Solo Diver

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    "Sorry", in my experience, is the worst thing you can say. I know you mean well.
     
  6. The Chairman

    The Chairman Chairman of the Board

    # of Dives: I just don't log dives
    Location: Cave Country!
    55,915
    23,287
    113
    It never bothered me, especially from a friend like JahJah. The only time "sorry" is insufficient is when it's their fault. Then it depends on their sincerity as well as other factors. Everyone is different though and we all handle grief and death differently.
     
    shoredivr and chillyinCanada like this.
  7. caruso

    caruso Banned

    # of Dives: 200 - 499
    Location: Long Island, NY
    1,662
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    Some things are better left for private messages. If they even need to be said at all.

    I know you mean well.
     
    Wookie and The Chairman like this.
  8. BertStevens

    BertStevens Barracuda

    # of Dives: 200 - 499
    Location: Lebanon, TN
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    I cannot imagine the horror you are dealing with. Like many have said, I cannot imagine loosing a child. I do want to commend you for reaching out for help. Even if it’s to a bunch of strangers/family on Scubaboard.
     
    The Chairman likes this.
  9. jstrang

    jstrang Instructor, Scuba

    # of Dives: 500 - 999
    Location: burlington, ON, CANADA
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    I know this is going to seem offensive but I am glad that you are suffering.

    Everyday someone, somewhere, is dealing with the death of a loved one but for the rest of us it is no big deal. Water on a ducks back. We go to bed and go to sleep.

    This should be the hardest thing you are ever going to deal with - accept it, find some hidden joy/delight/masochism in the fact that the more you suffer the greater the loss. the more important he was to you.Then find a way to carry on.

    Look for the beauty in the things you did together. Remember the things that he used to like doing with you. Remember to love another is the closest we get to heaven.

    In about the same amount of time as you were together that you are apart the pain will be less fierce.

    Thank you for sharing this Pete. It reminds us to hug our children a little closer. To appreciate that they will sometimes fail and make mistakes and we are grateful they are here to make them.

    john
     
    The Chairman likes this.
  10. caydiver

    caydiver Manta Ray

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    Yes. Thank you for making me cherish what I take for granted. I have not lost a child but have had a few blows in the last few years. My heart goes out to you and all your loved ones.
     
    The Chairman likes this.

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