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Funniest Diving quotes you have heard

Discussion in 'Basic Scuba Discussions' started by idratherbedivin, Apr 8, 2008.

  1. Joe-Diver

    Joe-Diver IDC Staff Instructor

    # of Dives: I'm a Fish!
    Location: North Richland Hills, Texas
    An unnamed user on this board once said:

    "When dealing with a panic'd diver on the surface, hold them under until they submit."

  2. ZzzKing

    ZzzKing Solo Diver

    # of Dives: 200 - 499
    Location: Dallas
    And another one said:

    And with integrated weights, I dont feel any of it ever.. Its all in my BC. I didnt even notice when I lost a pouch on a night dive in Cozumel. I was still able to dive and goof off and be annoyed in the morning when it was missing.."
    ADeadlierSnake likes this.
  3. AbyssalPlains

    AbyssalPlains Solo Diver

    # of Dives: 200 - 499
    Location: Tucson, AZ
    Overheard a conversation between a customer and the rep at my LDS the other day.
    "What can I help you with?"

    "I bought this mask from you guys, for snorkeling, and I guess I made a mistake. I took it on a scuba dive and the strap buckles broke off on both sides."

    Talk about the cringe factor.
  4. cajunscuba

    cajunscuba Guest

    Ok, new diver here but I would think the reason would have to do with depth and bottom time. Am I correct?

  5. Teamcasa

    Teamcasa Sr. Moderator ScubaBoard Supporter

    # of Dives: 500 - 999
    Location: Near Pasadena, CA
  6. CoyKoi

    CoyKoi Instructor, Scuba

    # of Dives: 1,000 - 2,499
    Location: Tulum, Quintana Roo, Mexico
    Yep. In a nutshell: the amount of nitrogen that has built up in your body from your dives that day determines how long you have to wait and at what depth you must remain there before surfacing.

    Good catch. Guess we won't put you in the same category with that Darwin diver who make the deco comment.
  7. BGF

    BGF Barracuda

    # of Dives: 100 - 199
    Location: shoreline CT
    had a dive buddy the other day, as we're gearing up for a shore dive and he'd just finished tightening the cam bands on his tank " aww damn, I thought I brought my filled tank but I don't have any air left." the rest of us kinda look at him and ask how he overlooked what the pressure was in his tank. A minute or two later " oh, I guess I have to turn the tank all the way on"
  8. Dan Watkins

    Dan Watkins Nassau Grouper

    My brother went on a cruise recently with his wife who is not a Scuba Diver, so they were going to do a snorkling excursion.

    The guide starts handing out masks, fins, and snorkles. A minute later my brother hears all this gurgling and gasping behind him. He turns around to see a young lady taking her mask off and gasping for air.

    The young lady proceeds to raise her hand and pose the question to the guide... "I think my mask is broken. This nose part here is where you are supposed to breath from right?"
  9. charlesml3

    charlesml3 Manta Ray

    # of Dives: 500 - 999
    Location: Raleigh, NC
    On a six-pack in Cozumel a couple of years ago. Some woman sitting beside me:

    Me: When did you get into Cozumel?
    Her: Yesterday morning but we can't dive the day we get here.
    Me: Why not?

    Her: Because that'll make our dive computers shut down.

    She actually believed her computer "knew" she'd been flying that day and would shut down if they made a dive. Both of them believed this.
    kimbalabala likes this.
  10. ruready7

    ruready7 Solo Diver

    # of Dives: 100 - 199
    Location: E. Tenn
    I like....you should always dive with a buddy...if you have an equipement problem buddy can help....if you run out of air buddy can help....if there is a shark attack your odds are now 50-50 instead of 100%
    Blue-Diver, TUTs_mama, 261311 and 4 others like this.

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