You should plan your safty stop(s) as part of your dive. You should plan your gas to have enough to be able to abort from any position on your dive for you and your buddy.
The gas your buddy would have used for that and your safty margin for error is what you should have when you surface.
Now, what you do with that gas after you have met all of the above obligations.. be that extending your stop or farting around on the surface. Its all good, so long as you don't ever put your self into a situation where you don't have gas for you and your buddy.
Your reserve is not YOUR gas, its your buddies.
For most of my dives I have a few turn points. On a typical boat/wreck dive I will have a 'find the line psi' which is when I should start heading back to the line, and a 'start accent psi' which is when I need to be accending.
My find the line gas gives me time to swim down the wreck find the line. My start accent gas tells me when I have to start accending NOW. If I'm not on the line and I hit my accent gas, its time to shoot a bag and surface.
If I hit the line with plenty of time untill my accent gas, I can fart around a bit near the line.