I suspect divers learn early to carry too much weight because as has been alluded to, the usual protocol when learning is to float at the the surface in a group, then drop as a group, and you need extra lead to make that drop happen, NOW. I suspect a lot of folks also like that kind of responsiveness. I have a friend who just cannot be convinced to drop any other way, and she is regularly over-weighted by a small amount, by my standard.
On the other hand, who cares (within limits)? There can be good reason to want to carry extra lead when shallow, wanting to be able to immobilize on the bottom for photography or just watching, especially with surge.
Less lead for less lead's sake can just as well lead to bouyancy control problems at the end of the dive. Even just enough might not always end up being adequate or preferable.
If you are happy overall with your bouyancy, who cares if someone else would choose less?
To a large degree, I agree with you. As long as the diver has enough ditchable ballast to survive a total BC failure AND they can perfectly manage their ascents and descents...carrying extra lead is not a problem.
Way too many people view scuba as a competition - seeing how little air they burn and how little lead they need. They don't have any good metrics to compare divers, so they gravitate to using these quantifiable parameters as indicators of competence. Both of these "obsessions" have very little value in my book.
I often carry extra ballast so that I can work effectively and be stable in a current. In warm water, I wear a 2 mm full suit and dive with various steel tanks, use a recreational BC and require ZERO lead. I can often get two dives from my 149 cu-ft tank. On the first dive when I head down with 3700 psi, I am really pretty heavy. If I take it on a second dive and run the pressure down to 400 psi or something on the safety stop, I am quite a lot lighter. So when I use this tank, with this exposure protection, I can not really fine tune my ballast. For the first dive, i am heavier than I need (or really want) to be.
The problem with excess lead is that many people "can't handle it" at it complicates their buoyancy control and can cause out of control ascents - especially with a thick wetsuit - since they got the double whammy of expanding air in the BC and expanding wetsuit.
The extra (unnecessary) lead causes them to have excess air in the BC at depth and this does not enhance their hydrodynamic efficiency due to drag AND difficulties with trim. So it is not beneficial to wear too much lead, but I think there is a somewhat blurry line between being "over" weighted versus just carrying a little extra lead.
As a DM, I have seen idiots make extremely poor decisions and have even gone so far as to DEMAND that they reduce ballast or I would refuse diving with them. When you see someone who THINKS they need much, much more lead than they need, then I KNOW they are unsafe and incompetent and have stepped in to avert an accident. Typically this is someone who has only dove in cold water and thick wetsuit and then comes to Florida with a shorty and tries to use the same amount of lead.