Is Scuba just not meant for me?

[jcyran]

For as long as I can remember, I’ve loved the ocean and everything in it. I’ve always wanted to swim with sharks and always wanted to explore the ocean. So a few months ago, I finally took the stand to do something about it and become an OW diver. I purchased the exam on PADI and completed it within the week, and passed. I immediately called a dive center and scheduled myself for classes. I was dying with excitement.

Fast forward to a week ago, my first confined water class. I was nervous but also excited to be one step closer to becoming certified. I passed the swimming test and it was time to gear up and go inside the water. As soon as we were all in, it was time to go underwater and use our regulators. Mind you, I’ve never used a regulator or breathed from a tank before. Immediately when we go under, I panic and quickly surface. I couldn’t get my breathing right, I know you’re supposed to breathe slow and continuously.. but it was something I’ve never done before and it felt very hard for me to breathe. So I adjusted the air flow on the regulator and still couldn’t do it. At that point, my instructor gave me his regulator to use (he said it was one of the best ones). It helped a little bit, but I still couldn’t get my breathing right. It was either too fast or very small shallow breaths and at that point I would feel like I’m “drowning” or “running out of air”. As time goes by I somehow adjust to it to keep up with the class.

It was time for the “flooding the mask” skill. That was the one skill I was concerned about and not confident in. I somehow managed to partially flood my mask and quickly clear it all in one breath before I even had time to panic about water up my nose. But later on it was time to fully flood the mask and clear it. I couldn’t do it. I tried a few times but I would either get water through the regulator or up my nose, which would cause me to panic and immediately surface. I don’t know how to breathe continuously from the regulator underwater without getting water up my nose. I would have to hold my breath so that way the water doesn’t get inhaled. But obviously you’re not supposed to hold your breath when you have a regulator in your mouth. It could be that I’m not comfortable having my nose in the water. All the times I’ve swam in the ocean or pool, I just exhale when I go under and occasionally I’d swallow or choke on some water. I never had to learn to get used to the feeling of water sitting in my nose and it’s not pleasant. By the end of the day, the first dive was done and I was disappointed in myself but still somewhat hopeful. I passed all the skills except for the fully flooding the mask. My instructor told me we would leave that skill for the next day. Once I got home I watched YouTube videos on the mask clearing skills and some tips/tricks.

Then come the next day, I felt my hope and faith slowly slipping away. I still wasn’t confident I’d be able to do and everything I watched on YouTube was simply forgotten. I geared up and got in the water with the instructor before everyone else went in, to try to do the mask skills again. This time I had to take off my mask for 60 seconds in the deep end, and then put it on and clear it. I didn’t want to go to the deep end but he insisted. I was allowed to hold my nose with the mask off for those 60 seconds, so I tried that. It didn’t work. I felt like I was running out of breath and it just didn’t feel natural. I started to panic and quickly surfaced. We try again, I manage to somehow get through the 60 seconds holding my nose. I put the mask on my head, hold my nose closed again through the mask so I can catch my breath, and then I try to clear it. I didn’t clear it correctly and still had the mask half-flooded, which caused me to inhale the water and immediately surface and panic. None of my tactics were helping and at this point it was stressing me out. I was overwhelmed and even started to tear up from the frustration. My instructor reassured me and told me to let it out, that it’s okay and that we’ll try again. Still couldn’t get it. So we moved on with the class. All the other skills I was able to do but the whole entire time I was too focused on my breathing in the deep end, I was uncomfortable. I was overthinking everything and was deciding in my head at that point, “I’m not enjoying this, this isn’t for me”.

It was time for the last mask skill, the “no mask swim”. One by one everyone goes, they all pass it. Once it was my turn I told my instructor I wasn’t able to do it. I hadn’t even completed the prior mask skills so there was no way I was going to swim without my mask. He understood and said that we would have to schedule some private pool sessions during the week before the open water dive class. I was told to get in a bathtub or pool and practice putting my face in the water with only a snorkel.

As soon as I get home, I’m exhausted and beat and overwhelmed. Mainly upset about not being able to get the mask skill. Even if I somehow was able to get the mask skill done during the private pool sessions.. I wouldn’t be confident enough to go on the open water dive and remove my mask at a further depth. If I started to panic, I would have to surface from 20-25 feet vs 10 feet.. I already knew in my bones that I would feel anxiety and not be able to do that.

I ended up coming to terms, I told my instructor and let him know that I don’t think I’m ready to get certified. I was diagnosed with anxiety a few years back, my anxiety played a huge role in the whole process. I told him I won't be able to get those mask skills in 2-3 pool sessions, and even if I somehow did, I wouldn't be comfortable doing the open water dive because of the other sensory overload issues I get. I'm not confident enough with it and I feel like I'm mentally not prepared enough.

I didn’t even bother practicing in the tub with my snorkel because it’s completely different once you step inside the water with all your gear and a regulator and mask.

Does anyone have any tips or thoughts? I feel like my anxiety and mental state is stopping me from doing it but I can’t help with the way I feel underwater and when I try to do the mask skill. Obviously with practice you can overcome that obstacle but I honestly lost hope. I’ve been super upset the past few days because it’s all I was looking forward to. Maybe this is something I can revisit in the future.

I also didn’t know there was a “discover scuba” course. I should have done that before the OW class to see if scuba is for me. But now I’m trying to figure out whether scuba isn’t for me or if it’s my anxiety and loss of motivation/hope stopping me from finishing and accomplishing it.

If you took the time to read this, thank you.

 

[Nemrod]

No, scuba is not for everybody. But, I think you are over complicating this adventure. Like the Nike moniker, Just Do It. Sometimes you need to move beyond yourself to accomplish something new. That is where you are at now.

 

[PamelaH]

I'm sorry panic got the best of you. I used to race triathlon and would always panic at the beginning of the open water swim until I started going to a lake and swimming regularly. Eventually I was comfortable. If you have access to a swimming pool perhaps you could practice exhaling through your nose so you don't get water up your nose and maybe you could gain comfort with being under he water, maskless and without holding your nose. You would likely surface in a panic over and over before gaining any competence or comfort but it might work.

If you can't then we go to plan B - snorkeling. A lot of people really enjoy snorkeling and you can do it with a noodle under your arms for a greater sense of safety.

I know next to nothing about suffering with anxiety but being underwater is not a very good place to try to overcome your fears. You need to do things on top of the water or with the surface near by to build your comfort level if you want to try again. If it just doesn't work you can see lots of beautiful marine life from the surface with a snorkel and all you have to do if needed is lift up your head. Might be a better option for you.

 

[grf88]

Look up Mammalian Diving Reflex which might give you a better idea of what is happening. Some suggest practicing immersing you face in a sink full of water. I have suggested this to others with a similar problem and they found it helpful.

 

[Gone for diving]

I would highly recommend you takea mask and snorkel, (no fins,) go to the beach where it shallow and practice. Face in the water, with both on. Nice full breaths, till you get comfortable,
Then snorkel in and out of mouth, clearing the snorkel, without removing your face,
When you are comfortable with that, snorkel in mouth, and crack your mask so it floods, then clear, and repeat,,, take your time, and do different exercises, getting use to the water in your nose, and clearing etc,
There is no hurry if you have a problem just stand up,
If you are not a natural mouth breather, just practice, in daily life while working,

 

[svs]

I had similar thoughts as @Gone for diving. You described your scuba class experience but what is your general water experience? Have you done snorkeling? How much? settings (shore/boat/different location). I think being very comfortable in a water helps scuba training.

 

[James79]

As @Nemrod said, you may be overcomplicating this. First and foremost, this is a voluntary thing we do for fun... you aren't under any time pressure. So don't get in your head about it.... take a deep breath and slow down. I always have and always will hate the water in my nose/sinuses that ends up being a part of taking my mask off underwater..... and if I can learn to deal with it, I bet you can too. There are many exercises you can do to get used to keeping the water in your nose from getting past the nose into the throat. One of my favorites that you might try is to wear your mask for a while making a point of only breathing through your mouth (including the exhale). After a bit of that take your mask into the shower with you..... then fill your mask with water like a bowl, and bend you face down to put it on (it will end up about 3/4 full of water on your face. And just breath. No reg, no snorkel, just a mask full of water and breath. If you accidentally pull some water in through your nose on the inhale, just pull the mask forward a bit and it dumps.... and if that happens, relax. Take a few breathes just to chill. Then try it again. After a bit you will find yourself standing there with a mask full of water breathing just fine. When you get there, press gently on the top of the mask and exhale through your nose and it will push the water out the bottom of the mask. And then do it again! Then transition to doing the same thing in the shallow end of the pool, or a deep bath tub.
Incremental acclimatizing can get us there (it worked for me). It may never be "easy" or "fun" (I hate having my mask off in the water with a passion!), but will be something you can do.

Best,

James

 

[humanuma]

I haven't seen it mentioned here yet, so I'd recommend going to a tub/pool/shallow beach -- anywhere you can stand -- and breathing off your snorkel with no mask on.

When the water hits our nose and in that split second it goes from being dry to being submerged, we feel a jump in our chests. It was mentioned above, but it has to do with our mammalian diving reflex and more specifically, stimulation of the anterior ethmoidal nerve. I find it reassuring to know that that jump in my chest and split second tightness in my throat is a natural physiological reaction, and is actually not my anxiety.

The key for those of us prone to anxiety is this: get comfortable with that natural chest jump feeling, without letting it trigger your anxiety response. That takes practice. Get comfy breathing off your snorkel with your face exposed (no mask) to trigger the response. You've got this!

 

[jcyran]

I had similar thoughts as @Gone for diving. You described your scuba class experience but what is your general water experience? Have you done snorkeling? How much? settings (shore/boat/different location). I think being very comfortable in a water helps scuba training.

Other than scuba class, I love to swim in pools and oceans. In May I was in DR just swimming around underwater looking at fish with my mask on, of course. I never had an issue come up where I had to clear it underwater, I just surface and do whatever I need to do. I’ve been snorkeling before as well, it’s pretty easy for me since my nose is covered and still get to breathe while I’m floating. Being right at the top of the water diminishes any anxiety because I know how to swim and I can quickly get access to air if an issue comes up

 

[sheeper]

So no. Diving is NOT for everyone. But if you want it to be for you there are some things you can do.
I have found that some students just need a different instructor. Sometimes, going more slowly, with less stress works wonders. It can also help to switch to a far more experienced instructor. Someone who is a Course Director/Instructor Trainer usually has more experience in helping new divers overcome these issues.
For example, I have a couple of pool "tricks" i teach my instructors to use with students to avoid panic and make these initial skills less stressful.