Worst Movie Ever?

[GrierHPharmD]

I was just musing over Winona Ryder playing Mary in Godfather III. Maybe she'd use that unbelievably sucky English accent she used in Bram Stoker's Dracula - my vote for Worst Movie Ever, even below Plan 9 From Outer Space (which was, if you'll recall, first released as Vampires from Outer Space). Those are followed shortly by Stallone movies (c'mon - Judge Dredd!!!) and anything that has the word "dog" in the title (And I'll throw in "Good Boy", about dogs from outer space, in that category.) Legends of the Fall is pretty high on the list - Brad Pitt making an Anthony Hopkins film into something amazingly stupid. Same with Meet Joe Black. (True story - my kids used to fast forward and rewind it to the part where Brad Pitt gets hit by a car, making him bounce back and forth across the top of the vehicle while they laughed like idiots...) and who could forget Blackula, Fritz the Cat ("He's animated! He's X-Rated!) and Flesh Gordon from the 70's.

And how 'bout Vampire Hookers, Vampyros Lesbos, or, for that matter, Hollywood Chainsaw Hookers. And speaking of sluttiness, how 'bout Crossroads with Britney Spears? What a classic, as were the hundreds or did it just seem like hundreds of movies starring the Olsen twins. And having finally gotten my kids into the wasteland of adolescence, I don't think I'll ever watch another Disney/Pixar movie, even when they are about sharks, clownfish, etc.

Also high on my list is Liquid Sky - a film about aliens who inhabit the body of a punk-rock nympho and use her to help them harvest endorphins from the brains of people she has sex with. I think it held the record for the most uses of the F word until Southpark: Bigger, Longer and Uncut was released. Absolutely great first date film. (Funny story - it was the first film I ever took my later-to-be-wife to. Our running joke for years was that she liked me enough to go out with me after that...)

As for Tarrantino flicks - you either get them or you don't. Same with Wes Anderson (Royal Tenenbaums and Life Aquatic) and David Lynch (Eraserhead, Twin Peaks, Blue Velvet, and recently, Big Fish.) Personally, I like those guys. I mean, how can you not love Samuel L. Jackson's description of his wallet, "It's the one that says 'Bad Mother ******!" or, my favorite:

"Ezekiel 25:17. "The path of the righteous man is beset on all sides by the inequities of the selfish and the tyranny of evil men. Blessed is he who, in the name of charity and good will, shepherds the weak through the valley of the darkness. For he is truly his brother's keeper and the finder of lost children. And I will strike down upon thee with great vengeance and furious anger those who attempt to poison and destroy my brothers. And you will know I am the Lord when I lay my vengeance upon you." <Blam><Blam><Blam><Blam><Blam><Blam><Blam><Blam><Blam><Blam><Blam><Blam>​

Kinda makes me all misty-eyed...

 

[GrierHPharmD]

I can't get sweet little shopliftin' Wynona out of my head. If she had been in G3, her accent would probaly have been a female version of Kevin Kline's in "I Love You To Death"...

 

[WileEDiver]

How about a movie called "National Lampoon's Last Resort" also released under the name "National Lampoon's Scuba School"?

What it lacks in redeeming socal value is equally marched in what it has an overabundance of: Two, count 'em two. Coreys (Corey Feldman and Corey Haim). The plot can't support one of the Coreys let alone both!

 

[Rick Inman]

The first Star Trek Movie, because I am a Star Trek fan.

I would never watch Pulp Fiction, because it is too foul for my tastes. But if I had, I would say that it is one of the best movies made, because of it's changing time frame (future to past to future), it's changing plots and protagonists within the same plot which tie neatly together at the end, a look at how moral-less people deal with moral values, the cast, the acting, the directing, the cutting, the humor, the spiritual message, and the uniqueness of the writing.

I would say all that if I had seen it, but like I said, I'd never watch that filth.

 

[GrierHPharmD]

The first Star Trek Movie, because I am a Star Trek fan.

I would never watch Pulp Fiction, because it is too foul for my tastes. But if I had, I would say that it is one of the best movies made, because of it's changing time frame (future to past to future), it's changing plots and protagonists within the same plot which tie neatly together at the end, a look at how moral-less people deal with moral values, the cast, the acting, the directing, the cutting, the humor, the spiritual message, and the uniqueness of the writing.

I would say all that if I had seen it, but like I said, I'd never watch that filth.

Of course. And I never have either. And I never inhaled. And I never had sexual relations with that woman...

 

[H2Andy]

has anybody mentioned any of the Cheech and Chong movies?

they have got to suck something serious

i remember thinking at the time (i was like, 14, 15) "there has to be some people
who find this funny, otherwise they wouldn't make them"

no

now i know

 

[GrierHPharmD]

has anybody mentioned any of the Cheech and Chong movies?

they have got to suck something serious

i remember thinking at the time (i was like, 14, 15) "there has to be some people
who find this funny, otherwise they wouldn't make them"

no

now i know

I think you had to be stoned. Or at least getting laid afterward...

But I remember thinking that they were so much lamer than the albums that had the same jokes on them. You'll have to admit that Up In Smoke and Next Movie were pretty cool. Okay, I'll confess - I was a bit Cheech and Chong fan in high school. And a Rocky Horror afficianado...

Admit it, Andy - you danced the Time Warp, didn't you?

 

[H2Andy]

Admit it, Andy - you danced the Time Warp, didn't you?

not sober

 

[GrierHPharmD]

Hey, who said anything about sober. I seem to remember that it was either smoke, drink or the promise of sweet companionship that made those midnight movies so great...

 

[mk57nato]

yea it was freddy got fingered.... i was suicidal after watching that crap....

Lol i liked hudson hawk and yes it was stupid, but it was meant to be that was the twist of it...