Advantages/Disadvantages to your buddy being a family member

[irishsquid]

My dive buddy quite often is my younger brother. I tend to treat him as I would any dive buddy; maybe a tad more attentive. Not as in less attentive if you weren't my brother but more so to him, but not overbearing. The only difference would be: in a dire emergency/rescue, with my brother, there could possibly be 2 victims versus 1, as I could NOT bail on him if all else failed.
We plan our dives so that scenario doesn't creep up on us.

 

[Madcows]

I have done all my courses with my son and nearly all my dives. I admit a great deal of distraction with being preoccupied with his health and safety. It is quite hard for me to relax. When we got deep water certified I nearly couldnt sleep the night before due to worry about the class and the potential of him getting narc'ed. I think it all is about me needing to trust that he has an equivalent amount of training and experience as me and that he can handle the situation. He is 16 and we have only been diving a year so I trust that soon I will chill.

 

[Kiwi303]

sounds like a reason for wife swapping to me

 

[windapp]

If your dive buddy is somebody you know and like, you stay closer not just because you have to, but because you like to. It is so much easier to maintain buddy contact when you are pointing out cool stuff to each other rather than just babysitting one another.

 

[blackvans1234]

During my OW dives, my sister was my buddy. Her and I are 2 years apart, and I know that I would easily risk my own life to save hers. It really let us have a great time during the surface intervals, as the other students werent as comfortable talking with each other, and being able to joke/laugh about stupid stuff. Maybe that's just because they're new divers, idk

All in all, it's a good thing if you ask me. I'm not trying to impress her, and she's not going to try to do something im not comfortable with, like some aggressive random dive buddy might (theres always a few, right?)

 

[Searcaigh]

I have been diving a lot with my daughter recently while she is home from university and upgrading her skills and training underwater by taking a few more courses.

I let her lead last week on a dive site that she had dived and I had not, just to help build her confidence, although she swam right past a seahorse that we were planning to find, so she still needs more experience in critter finding, but a good diver.

I probably am more concerned about her than if I was with another non-related buddy.

 

[Pauly854]

I dive primarily with my 16 year old son. He certified last summer, at age 15. I find that I do keep closer tabs on him than I would someone else. I'm not exactly tense or nervous...but very "aware", if that makes sense. I did pose a question to him recently that gave me a little concern. I asked him what he would do if he saw me ditch my weights and make an emergency ascent. He said he would come after me, and try to help. We had a long talk about that response. I let him know, in NO uncertain terms, that he was NEVER to put himself in harms way for me. If he can safely help...then do so. But never risk getting bent for me. Of course, he turns it around on me. "What would YOU do if I made an uncontrolled ascent?".....DON'T CHANGE THE SUBJECT! Little brat.

 

[Bubbletrubble]

I dive primarily with my 16 year old son. He certified last summer, at age 15. I find that I do keep closer tabs on him than I would someone else. I'm not exactly tense or nervous...but very "aware", if that makes sense. I did pose a question to him recently that gave me a little concern. I asked him what he would do if he saw me ditch my weights and make an emergency ascent. He said he would come after me, and try to help. We had a long talk about that response. I let him know, in NO uncertain terms, that he was NEVER to put himself in harms way for me. If he can safely help...then do so. But never risk getting bent for me. Of course, he turns it around on me. "What would YOU do if I made an uncontrolled ascent?".....DON'T CHANGE THE SUBJECT! Little brat.

@Pauly854: I think it's wonderful that you had that talk with your son. All parents who dive with their sons/daughters should discuss the exact scenario you described.

FWIW, I don't see anything wrong with your son's initial response, so long as he follows you to the surface at a controlled rate (< 60 ft/min). A prompt ascent would put him in good position to help you at the surface. If the two of you are conducting recreational dives, direct ascent to the surface is permitted. Safety stops are optional.

I do hope that your son understands that the two of you are different people...with different diving skills...and different emergency training. If he hasn't taken a rescue dive course yet, then I'd encourage him to take one. In a rescue class, he'll learn that every rescue entails risk. The key is identifying that risk, minimizing it if possible, and then deciding how best to proceed for everyone involved.

In October 2008, we had a scuba fatality here at La Jolla Shores in the San Diego, CA, area. The father of a father-son buddy team died.
Here's a link to the initial News 10 story about the incident.
A more detailed report is included in this write-up by Colleen Mensching at the North County Times.
Several months later, Michael Steitz of the Union-Tribune interviewed the son for the first time since the incident.
Sad story...and entirely preventable.

 

[ferris213]

I started diving with my wife and have done most subsequent dives with her, due to her health reasons, recently I have been diving with instabuddies. When diving with her, I find that I worry less, because I know that when I turn around I'll see her. With instabuddies I never seem to relax. I ask their air pressure more often etc. I have had to show someone their console and point out they were 3 mins from NDL.

I just feel I can rely on her more which makes me more comfortable in the water. (and hopefully vice versa)

Similar to what others have said, I think I would definitely risk more in an emergency with her than with an instabuddy.

 

[Pauly854]

@Bubbletrubble: Thanks for the link. I will be reading it shortly. Your suggestion about him ascending at a controlled rate is exactly what we talked about. By all means help me...but do not blow the surface and risk getting bent. I was just disturbed about his response because it seemed like he would be ready to ditch weights too, and scream to the surface after me. That is NOT what I would want. In our normal diving habitat...not a big issue. 30'-ish max. But I was trying to instill the old (and true) adage..."Dead heroes save no one". Thanks again