Did I take too big a risk?

[Jersey]

Sounds like you did exctly what I would have. After finding your potential buddy lacked some recent experience, you both agreed it would be prudent to seek other buddies. You were buddied with someone who had credentials. Great. Except he broke the rules - you specifically told him no wreck penetrations & he agreed to be there for situations - a little hard to do if he was in the wreck!

The only thing I would suggest is learning to be confrontational in a non-confrontational manner. How about - "I thought we had a plan & I explained that based on my lack of experience here, I would prefer not to penetrate the wreck, but then I looked & away you went leaving me very much alone & I was not very happy about that & will not dive with you again." You could take him aside privately to discuss. I used to have problems confronting people. Got over that!!

But - great job, keep diving! Sounds like it was a tough day - first a green diver, then a bad buddy...

Jersey

 

[GQMedic]

You're not *****ing needlessly. You were GREAT about it! A total sweetie. Personally, had he been MY buddy, this scene would have been VERY sad for my "buddy".

I would probably have just been like "Hey! be my guest, moron"! As soon as Diver Dummy went in the wreck, I would have made my normal ascent. After I surfaced alone with the DM asking where Diver Dummy was, I would have shrugged and told him "Dunno! He took off, I waited a minute, he never showed back up, he went off in the direction of the wreck, so, I surfaced." and let the Divemaster EAT this moron while I laugh having ratted this guy off and making him look like a total weenie to everyone.

But, hey, you're nice, (I'm not) and you handled it well.

 

[tssplash]

If you'll read my post again, you should easily be able to see that I never suggested that JessicaDodge go solo. On the contrary I stated more than once that a diver should be experience, properly skilled, and certified before doing so.

I said that this situation that JessicaDodge went through is a perfect example of why Solo Certification should be recognized world-wide. Noone wants to be responsible for a moron buddy like that. At least with Solo Certification though she would have an alternative down the road if she felt confident enough in her own abilities to take on solo-diving. She wouldn't be stuck with some of these divers who are accidents looking for a place to happen.

I'm a true believer that solo-diving for those who are qualified to do it is much safer than buddy diving. I've had too many buddies pull stunts like the one mentioned in this discussion, and also things like trying to jerk the primary regulator out of my mouth, straying off during a dive, and many, many other dangerous things such as this. Some of them where even dive professionals.

The Liability issues alone that are associated with buddy diving are enough reason for me to avoid it. If I loose my life while diving, I don't want it to be because of some "CLOWN" who I was forced to dive with by a dive operator. And I certainly don't want to be sued by the family of a forced-on-me dive buddy who might be on a suicide mission, or thinks their ten feet tall, and bullet proof.

The fact is, some folks simply act the same when their heads go underwater, as they do when they get behind the wheel of a vehicle, (all logical thinking seems to just go right out the window) and I've found from my own experience that how intelligent, or qualified they appear on the surface doesn't always give a true indication of how they'll perform when they get underwater.



"Splash"

 

[bm9]

I completely agree that you did the right thing. It sounds like you found a bad buddy, considering he lied about his experience and didn't stay with the dive plan.
Glad to hear that everything ended up safe. You should never be pushed by a dive partner to go beyond your comfort level during the dive. Hopefully with better luck at getting to know your next potential dive partner and their motives you will find one that will lead to some enjoyable diving.

 

[Scuba_Vixen]

You have nothing to beat yourself up over at all, you made a good decision in a short timeframe, you limitted your personal risk, (by not going in), and limitted his risk by being able to summon help if he didn't come out in reasonable time. There may have been some tense moments, but you handled it well. It's a lot different here and now with unlimitted time to rethink, and 20/20 hindsight to guide us. It's about making the good call at the time it needs to be made, you did it. Some buddies are gonna be princes, some are gonna be frogs, ..... That's just how things are......

Just keep diving for yourself and don't bother kissing either...


Darlene

 

[Falconer]

Jessica, you did the right thing staying outside the wreck,
you dove your plan, your macho buddy was an idiot.
One thing you need to develop though in this sport is a
slightly thick skin. Dont be afraid to tell someone " I really
dont want to dive with you " and after having said that dont feel bad about it and let it ruin your day. I learned that early on as
I tend to let things bother me too much. I agree with another poster in that you cant always tell topside about a person,
there true colors usually come out down below. After the first dive
I would have ask the captain to get with another buddy, dont be
embarrased, it's your money and your time. These situations
always come up and you can learn to handle them without
letting them ruin your day, dont be rude but dont be timid either.

Kevin Falconer Fort Myers, FL

 

[nitroxbabe]

I agree with most everything posted here except one thing...

I feel STRONGLY that you should have notified the DM.

Recently I was buddied with someone I didn't know well for a deep wreck dive. He had dove the first dive with another very experienced diver who I DO know well. On the second dive, this experienced diver and another experienced diver wanted to go to some deeper penetration. I agreed to take the other diver as my buddy.

We discussed our dive plan and everything seemed fine. Little did I know that this guy was a complete air hog, about to go on a 120'+ dive with me.

To make a long story short, the guy did NOT keep an eye on his air (and here is my whole point: NO ONE TOLD ME ABOUT HIM - I DID NOT KNOW THERE WAS A PROBLEM!!!!). He made it back to the boat in rough seas with about 50 psi in his tank, and an empty pony.

I guess what I'm saying here is that by not letting anyone know what was up, you set up the idiot's next buddy to be a "victim".

There are a lot of reasons why I was angry about that. First, I was worried about this guy. Second, I could have been endangered if things went south. Third, my expensive wreck dive was cut short. Then, on the boat, the guy who stuck me with the air hog said, "Oh, sorry about that, I probably should have told you." Yea, I guess you should have.

If you EVER have a problem with a buddy, PLEASE LET SOMEONE KNOW. The life/dive you save may be someone elses.

 

[Falconer]

To make a long story short, the guy did NOT keep an eye on his air (and here is my whole point: NO ONE TOLD ME ABOUT HIM - I DID NOT KNOW THERE WAS A PROBLEM!!!!). He made it back to the boat in rough seas with about 50 psi in his tank, and an empty pony.

Yeah, it can be real crap shoot with a random buddy,
I've been with new divers that I felt were very good buddys
and experienced divers that seemed quite reckless. That
does seem to be the problem with those deeper dives though, by the time you get down the achor line and orient yourself you dont really have much time left, of course your bud was probably at
under 1500 by the time you got to bottom. I dont know if I'd
dive with a unfamiliar buddy on this kind of a dive but I suppose you do what you must to get some diving in.

Kevin Falconer Fort Myers, FL