Funniest Diving quotes you have heard

[nsp09]

What did the sea say to the sand?


-nothing, it just waved!

 

[Dockmaster]

I was teaching a snorkeling class at a Boy Scout camp and one student was having a hard time keeping up with us on the way out to the deep swim float, so I went back to swim with him. On the way to the float he said "I've never been in water over my head before". I told him that would have been nice to know before we left shore since we were now in 12 feet of water! Once the panic passed, he made it through the class without drowning.

After class, he said he was going to work on snokeling at free swim all week and he would show me that he had it mastered by Friday. True to his word, Friday afternoon we went out and he completed all of the requirements. When I gave him with his card at the closing campfire, you would have thought that I had given him a solid brick of gold.

 

[fisheater]

I was teaching a snorkeling class at a Boy Scout camp and one student was having a hard time keeping up with us on the way out to the deep swim float, so I went back to swim with him. On the way to the float he said "I've never been in water over my head before". I told him that would have been nice to know before we left shore since we were now in 12 feet of water! Once the panic passed, he made it through the class without drowning.

After class, he said he was going to work on snokeling at free swim all week and he would show me that he had it mastered by Friday. True to his word, Friday afternoon we went out and he completed all of the requirements. When I gave him with his card at the closing campfire, you would have thought that I had given him a solid brick of gold.

You gave him something far more valuable than gold, self assurance and confidence that he can face and achieve seemingly insurmountable goals. Well done and, from this old Scoutmaster, thanks.


Posted via Mobile Device

 

[wrybosome]

On a boat dive, before the dive. Diver is looking at a Frigatebird hovering over a rock off the bow.

Diver: "What's that bird called?"
DM, shading eyes and pausing for identification: "...Jim"

 

[jmorriss]

From Another Student in my friends OW Class:

“ I think the RDP tables are just a big waste of time. Someone who really likes numbers and had a lot of time on their hands must have come up with this. I don’t use it as a planner. Just more of a suggestion.”

This is also a lady who tried to play off that she got certified awhile ago and just needed a refresher.

Also a lady who couldn't descend in the lake b/c she was flopping around on the surface trying to pull herself down with her BC fully inflated.

 

[jrc]

I was in a lds one day and a employee had a reg attached to a tank. He said to me try this reg it beaths great.

 

[ScubaSteve]

I was in a lds one day and a employee had a reg attached to a tank. He said to me try this reg it beaths great.

There must be a second part to this right?

 

[snowflake4727]

"the boat was heading out with 3 instructors (one NAUI one PADI one SSI) with their students to do their first boat dive upon reaching the site and settling in the captain realized the boat was sinking and the pump was broken and would be on the bottom in ~15 minutes. there was an island about 100 yards off they could swim too. he took the instructors aside(to not frighten the students) and informed them of this problem. each instructor then proceeded to take his class aside and tell them of this. the PADI instructor said, " ok class, the boat is going down, i want you to take a 240 deg. heading towards this island, inflate your bc and make way to the island for the rescue boat." the NAUI instructor said, "ok class, the boat is sinking, i want you to jump in, drop down about 10' , make way to the island and wait for rescue." the SSI instructor said, " ok class, the plan has changed some. it's going to cost an extra 25$ today." the class asked why. he says "because were doing a wreck dive in about 30 minutes."


I have heard this before, however it was the PADI guy charging the extra money.

 

[jrc]

are you serious

 

[jrc]

there must be a second part to this right?

yes, they all beath great on the surface :d