Certainly don't give up diving...
Stuff happens. Recognizing where something went wrong and taking steps to ensure it doesn't happen again is part of building self confidence. Thanksgiving weekend, I got the unique opportunity of not paying enough attention to changing conditions while submerged, ascended in a (long) surf zone accidentally and promptly experienced what it was like to get thrown on rocks and pounded into them by waves until your buddy rescues you. I screwed up, learned some lessons, and got lucky. No chamber ride in the world cures a broken neck. But I'll still dive. Next weekend, to be exact.
Onto your issues, I'm not a doctor, so take anything I say with a grain of salt. I've done various things related to diving that have caused muscle aches. Determining whether something is worrisome is a judgment call, and it's best to err on the side of caution, as has been pointed out.
Now my ears pose a problem for me, not really with diving, but with being extraordinarily sensitive to equilibrium. As a result, when anything goes wrong with my ears, or if my equilibrium is screwed up, say by being on a boat, I am instantly miserable. Pressure changes seem to be absolutely fine so long as they are bilateral.
I haven't had dive-related barotrauma, but I have had an untreated ear infection. I realized it when I was watching Dark City in the theater, tried to run to the bathroom to throw up, and literally could not walk in a straight line. My head was spinning, I was listing badly to one side and I felt like I was going to pass out. I also know that the pain in my ear and head and the nausea the feeling was inducing was sufficient that if I'd had a gunshot wound to the leg, I wouldn't have felt it.
It sounds like you had some really hideous stuff going on with your ear. With a slightly iffy dive profile, again, caution is best, but from personal experience, I can tell you that nasty ear problems can cause a real downward spiral. If the pain had subsided or disappeared (and the sudden popping could easily cause an equilibrium shift), it might have made you more aware of a pain in your arm.
Relax. People screw up and accidents happen. If you quit or beat yourself over something, what have you accomplished? If you learn from things that happen and use the gained knowledge to improve future situations, it makes you a better person.