Hello all! I'd like to reflect upon my journey to Roatan, Honduras as a vacation/fact finding tour as part of our dive shop's services to promote and organize trips. I have now traveled so far to Grenada, West Indies about 6 times, Puerto Rico, and Bocas del Toro, Panama. I like to mention where I've been because I'd like those reading this to know I do have experience in different places in the world.
Arrival: Three of us arrived around 1pm. Our itinerary was Albuquerque, NM to Houston, TX, to Roatan. Flights were smooth. A few months before flying out Continental changed the flights from a one day trip to two. They put us up with vouchers in Houston at a very nice Holiday Inn.
Be aware that the airport in Roatan is an instant mess. Going through customs is a breeze but then everyone must get their luggage off the carousel and place it on a single giant xray machine that no airport staff is actually looking at. It backs up into a giant pile of luggage on the other end and it's a race to get your bags and get away from it. All the while, it's in a tiny room with a 3/4 compliment of a Boeing 737...
Once out we went to the Avis desk and rented a vehicle. We were given a diesel Mitsubishi truck, 4 door, 4 wheel drive. Leaving the airport is a nightmare. There are 4 lines of vehicles that all siphon into ONE exit. It took 15 minutes just to get out and the exit was only a few hundred feet away. Worse yet, at the exit they demand something like 25 Lempira (something like $1.10). Be prepared.
Getting around: Having a rental vehicle I never used a taxi. There are many taxis on the West End area but very few on the East End. One of the most odd things I found is that unlike every other country I have visited, there is a serious lack of public transportation for locals. A couple of buses drive around, but not nearly in the magnitude of other places. I stopped for a LOT of people hitchhiking on the side of the road. That's how most locals get around, I didn't mind doing it, and they were appreciative. Be aware that there are many ex-pats living here so locals may think you are local as well. I once came to a stop somewhere and found a local guy in the back of my truck out of nowhere. Just keep going and stop when they bang on the roof
The main road is paved, the majority of all other roads are not. They are also not well maintained and are a huge pain. I never found the need to use the 4WD but the truck had NO suspension. The other amazing thing I have never seen is such an incredible number of speed bumps. Even on horrible roads where a person running on foot could beat you to your destination because you are going so slow to try to avoid a herniated disc in your spine. They LOVE speed bumps here and at times you can find them every 30 to 50 feet. Take aspirin or your preferred prescription painkiller, you'll need it.
Take note that while the speed bump is adored here, signage is not. Finding most things can be difficult to impossible most times. If you speak no Spanish be sure to learn the phrase 'Donde esta....' which means 'where is....'. You will use it a lot if you are driving around yourself. Large resorts are marked when you get to them but there are no indicators along the way to ANYthing.
West End: I'm bound to get criticism for this but I only went to West End really once. It is the most built up location on the island. It is a mostly one lane, unpaved road along the shore with many little stores and stuff like that. There is an abundance of dive shops, maybe 6 in the about 1/2 to 3/4 mile stretch. I prefer little local places that reflect the culture so I didn't spend a ton of time there. In addition, the water crashing up onto shore is a murky, almost black color. I wouldn't get into it because the way it looked.
Accomodations: We stayed at Turquoise Bay Resort. See your separate review of it Here. Long story short, we don't recommend it.
We visited Fantasy Island to utilize their dive shop. It was a really cool looking place. Their dive shop was incredible. I mean, this was the Wal-Mart of diving. Operating a dive shop and having been to many in the past, my jaw is still bruised from when it hit the floor at the size of this operation. Several compressors, 9 boats, over 350 tanks. It...was...incredible.
We had heard about going over to CocoView and decided to visit it one day. To get there you must take the first right immediately after you find Fantasy Island when traveling east. There is NO SIGNAGE to indicate this location. Worse yet, it leads to what appears to be some sort of warehouse/mining operation or something. The last thing you expect to be there is a water taxi. I went down there and started asking in Spanish one of the guys about Cocoview. He told me he spoke English and to speak to him in English only. That was enough of a turnoff I wasn't going to bother going to see this place.
Culture: Really, there is a huge lack of culture here. I mean, it's nonexistent. This island is so Americanized it's almost sickening. Everywhere else I have been you find cars and buses blaring local music, people with grills making chicken on the side of the road where you can stop anywhere if you are hungry and want to get amazing food, vendors that cruise around selling local trinkets and stuff. That is the kind of thing I love and that is in full abundance everywhere I've been but here. It's quiet, no one plays music, when you hear music it's from the U.S., sometimes some Reggaeton but nothing locally made, no roadside vendors, nothing. There is even an Applebee's. I had no idea that franchise existed outside of the U.S....
I enjoy practicing Spanish when I go to Spanish speaking countries and I try to use it exclusively. I was surprised when everyone replies back to you in English. More locals speak English to each other than I expected as well.
Hole in the Wall in Jonesville: I heard great reviews about this place before going. Once again, there is no signage to get there. The only way we found it was the fact we found the water taxi dropping people off. If not for that I don't think I would have found it. Go into Jonesville and take the last right. After a minute you'll find a shipyard looking place. Look to your left around the water and hope to find the water taxi.
We took the taxi over with three Canadian women who had asked us as we parked if they were in the right spot. We said we thought we were but weren't sure. Come to find out they had lived here for a few months and THEY didn't even know where it was.
The boat ride takes just a few minutes. We were greeted by a bearded man wearing a semi-tattered short sleeved button up shirt. He appeared as though he had been shipwrecked somewhere for a while. He greeted us with "Welcome to the Hole". I don't think he understands just how accurate that name is. The place has about 15 or 20 tables and a bar. His greeting was the extent of his help. We took a table near the bird in the back but there is no service. Maybe I offended them because the first thing I did was take the scarlet macaw on my arm and play with it (I own two large macaws and 8 smaller ones at home, I'm very familiar with them). This happened much to the surprise of everyone in the room and it was quite entertaining, I think I even heard someone drop a fork...
While waiting for non-existent service another man came out from the back to bus a table that two people had left from. This man was fascinating. He is the full embodiment of what you would expect from someone who has been shipwrecked somewhere for 30 years. Far more than the man who greeted us. He was unkempt and didn't appear as though he was capable of speaking any language at all after not having anyone to talk to for so long. He came out in a hunchback way and began picking up napkins. He took the lightly used napkin an attractive American girl in her 20s had been using, looked around, and snuck it into his pocket. That was about it for me. Immediately thereafter one of the people in our party returned from the bar to inform us that there was a 'waiting list' 15 people long in front of us. Back to the water taxi....
I have no idea what people see in this place but I would only trick people I don't like into going there.
The Asylum at Camp Bay run by Serena: This is BY FAR the BEST place on the entire island to go for food and drink. It is a beautiful little building over the water run by one of the most friendly people I've ever met, Serena (a local who has lived here her entire life) and her husband Jimmy, a Colombian-American guy who was really cool.
Serena offers DELICIOUS lobster tails done up in garlic and they are fresh within the past few hours. She also offers whatever fish she gets from fisherman on any given day. She can COOK! She also knows how to pour a real drink unlike anywhere else on the island. Her rum punch is delicious and when asked for one she actually went and obtained a fresh pineapple from her yard to use in making it.
She also has a small turtle refuge right there where she takes care of sea turtles that have been injured by local poachers. When asked if we could touch them she immediately jumped into the water and grabbed one for us to play with. She couldn't have been more accommodating and was certainly the coolest person we met on the trip.
The Asylum is the ONLY place on the island where there are some signs indicating where it is, but they are small and you happen to see them by chance. The Asylum is in Camp Bay, about 30 mins from the main road. The road is in extremely poor condition and I won't lie, it's hell getting there and back. But it is definitely worth going, even if you go just once.
McNabb in Jonesville: This place is close to Hole in the Wall which is where we decided to eat after discovering the three old salts there. The food is so salty I felt like a slug, slowly dehydrating to death BUT it is worth going there for the monkey. I'm not talking about eating monkey but their actual pet monkey on a little leash. It's a little year and a half old brown spider monkey that is really friendly. It'll give little love bites but wont hurt you. Loves to climb all over and be swung around. I never liked monkeys but after messing with one they're pretty cool now. They also have an Amazon parrot which is pretty nice, and for some reason, an enclosure with three crocodiles and a few turtles. The monkey was so cool we actually went back a second time just to see it. The house next door also has a monkey on their dock as well as several macaws in their trees. Very cool stuff and a friendly couple who talked to us about their pet birds.
Jenny's Lusty Lizard (heading west past or before the airport, I think past, don't quite remember): Really cool place! It is run by Jenny, a friendly local who has a bar and small restaurant. She gives everyone who shows up a magic marker to write on the wall. The walls are covered with all sorts of names, sayings, and all of that. Grouper was delicious, beer was cold, atmosphere was friendly. We definitely suggest it!
Gio's in French Harbor: This place was sort of mediocre. Staff was nice and service was good but the food was...well...meh. Not bad, not great, but average. Seating outside on the patio above the water was nice and provided a nice view. It was also conveniently setup to provide a nice, comfortable breeze. I have no particular complaints. If you are driving a rental car be aware that parking in front of Gio's is able to take about 5 vehicles. When we were there a taxi was sideways taking up two spaces. We parked across the street in an abandoned lot next to a church. Don't hesitate to park wherever you want! French Harbor is a one lane street. If you can cram a car somewhere, do it! To get to Gio's, take the turn into French Harbor at the gas station and main taxi stop. Continue down the road until you hit a point where it is right or left. Turn right, continue until the road begins to wrap back around to the right. This will give you the best opportunity to utilize parking at Gio's or the abandoned lot.
BJ's Backyard in Oak Ridge: A more easily found location, continue down the road at the turnoff at Oak Ridge. Again, ask people where it is. I happened to run into Serena from Camp Bay who was in the back seat of a truck. Just so happened we were right in front of the turn to the place. When we arrived it was around 330 or 4pm. It was occupied by about 15 to 20 ex-pats. Three were doing a little live show, one playing lead guitar, one playing rhythm, and another guy playing a variety of harmonica, tambourine, etc. The music played was, of course, very American. I really can't stand Sweet Home Alabama, regardless of who plays it. The woman who appeared to be running things, I suspect was BJ, was pretty far out there. I mean...wayyyy far out there. I've only met a few people that cooked from LSD in the 1960's...
After a while EVERYONE cleared out. Ex-pats here apparently travel in packs, talking about themselves and their 'life stories'. Thanks, but no thanks. The worst was when one woman who told me she lived here for 6 years and said this was the least Americanized place she has been after having been to most of the islands in the Caribbean.
Arrival: Three of us arrived around 1pm. Our itinerary was Albuquerque, NM to Houston, TX, to Roatan. Flights were smooth. A few months before flying out Continental changed the flights from a one day trip to two. They put us up with vouchers in Houston at a very nice Holiday Inn.
Be aware that the airport in Roatan is an instant mess. Going through customs is a breeze but then everyone must get their luggage off the carousel and place it on a single giant xray machine that no airport staff is actually looking at. It backs up into a giant pile of luggage on the other end and it's a race to get your bags and get away from it. All the while, it's in a tiny room with a 3/4 compliment of a Boeing 737...
Once out we went to the Avis desk and rented a vehicle. We were given a diesel Mitsubishi truck, 4 door, 4 wheel drive. Leaving the airport is a nightmare. There are 4 lines of vehicles that all siphon into ONE exit. It took 15 minutes just to get out and the exit was only a few hundred feet away. Worse yet, at the exit they demand something like 25 Lempira (something like $1.10). Be prepared.
Getting around: Having a rental vehicle I never used a taxi. There are many taxis on the West End area but very few on the East End. One of the most odd things I found is that unlike every other country I have visited, there is a serious lack of public transportation for locals. A couple of buses drive around, but not nearly in the magnitude of other places. I stopped for a LOT of people hitchhiking on the side of the road. That's how most locals get around, I didn't mind doing it, and they were appreciative. Be aware that there are many ex-pats living here so locals may think you are local as well. I once came to a stop somewhere and found a local guy in the back of my truck out of nowhere. Just keep going and stop when they bang on the roof
The main road is paved, the majority of all other roads are not. They are also not well maintained and are a huge pain. I never found the need to use the 4WD but the truck had NO suspension. The other amazing thing I have never seen is such an incredible number of speed bumps. Even on horrible roads where a person running on foot could beat you to your destination because you are going so slow to try to avoid a herniated disc in your spine. They LOVE speed bumps here and at times you can find them every 30 to 50 feet. Take aspirin or your preferred prescription painkiller, you'll need it.
Take note that while the speed bump is adored here, signage is not. Finding most things can be difficult to impossible most times. If you speak no Spanish be sure to learn the phrase 'Donde esta....' which means 'where is....'. You will use it a lot if you are driving around yourself. Large resorts are marked when you get to them but there are no indicators along the way to ANYthing.
West End: I'm bound to get criticism for this but I only went to West End really once. It is the most built up location on the island. It is a mostly one lane, unpaved road along the shore with many little stores and stuff like that. There is an abundance of dive shops, maybe 6 in the about 1/2 to 3/4 mile stretch. I prefer little local places that reflect the culture so I didn't spend a ton of time there. In addition, the water crashing up onto shore is a murky, almost black color. I wouldn't get into it because the way it looked.
Accomodations: We stayed at Turquoise Bay Resort. See your separate review of it Here. Long story short, we don't recommend it.
We visited Fantasy Island to utilize their dive shop. It was a really cool looking place. Their dive shop was incredible. I mean, this was the Wal-Mart of diving. Operating a dive shop and having been to many in the past, my jaw is still bruised from when it hit the floor at the size of this operation. Several compressors, 9 boats, over 350 tanks. It...was...incredible.
We had heard about going over to CocoView and decided to visit it one day. To get there you must take the first right immediately after you find Fantasy Island when traveling east. There is NO SIGNAGE to indicate this location. Worse yet, it leads to what appears to be some sort of warehouse/mining operation or something. The last thing you expect to be there is a water taxi. I went down there and started asking in Spanish one of the guys about Cocoview. He told me he spoke English and to speak to him in English only. That was enough of a turnoff I wasn't going to bother going to see this place.
Culture: Really, there is a huge lack of culture here. I mean, it's nonexistent. This island is so Americanized it's almost sickening. Everywhere else I have been you find cars and buses blaring local music, people with grills making chicken on the side of the road where you can stop anywhere if you are hungry and want to get amazing food, vendors that cruise around selling local trinkets and stuff. That is the kind of thing I love and that is in full abundance everywhere I've been but here. It's quiet, no one plays music, when you hear music it's from the U.S., sometimes some Reggaeton but nothing locally made, no roadside vendors, nothing. There is even an Applebee's. I had no idea that franchise existed outside of the U.S....
I enjoy practicing Spanish when I go to Spanish speaking countries and I try to use it exclusively. I was surprised when everyone replies back to you in English. More locals speak English to each other than I expected as well.
Hole in the Wall in Jonesville: I heard great reviews about this place before going. Once again, there is no signage to get there. The only way we found it was the fact we found the water taxi dropping people off. If not for that I don't think I would have found it. Go into Jonesville and take the last right. After a minute you'll find a shipyard looking place. Look to your left around the water and hope to find the water taxi.
We took the taxi over with three Canadian women who had asked us as we parked if they were in the right spot. We said we thought we were but weren't sure. Come to find out they had lived here for a few months and THEY didn't even know where it was.
The boat ride takes just a few minutes. We were greeted by a bearded man wearing a semi-tattered short sleeved button up shirt. He appeared as though he had been shipwrecked somewhere for a while. He greeted us with "Welcome to the Hole". I don't think he understands just how accurate that name is. The place has about 15 or 20 tables and a bar. His greeting was the extent of his help. We took a table near the bird in the back but there is no service. Maybe I offended them because the first thing I did was take the scarlet macaw on my arm and play with it (I own two large macaws and 8 smaller ones at home, I'm very familiar with them). This happened much to the surprise of everyone in the room and it was quite entertaining, I think I even heard someone drop a fork...
While waiting for non-existent service another man came out from the back to bus a table that two people had left from. This man was fascinating. He is the full embodiment of what you would expect from someone who has been shipwrecked somewhere for 30 years. Far more than the man who greeted us. He was unkempt and didn't appear as though he was capable of speaking any language at all after not having anyone to talk to for so long. He came out in a hunchback way and began picking up napkins. He took the lightly used napkin an attractive American girl in her 20s had been using, looked around, and snuck it into his pocket. That was about it for me. Immediately thereafter one of the people in our party returned from the bar to inform us that there was a 'waiting list' 15 people long in front of us. Back to the water taxi....
I have no idea what people see in this place but I would only trick people I don't like into going there.
The Asylum at Camp Bay run by Serena: This is BY FAR the BEST place on the entire island to go for food and drink. It is a beautiful little building over the water run by one of the most friendly people I've ever met, Serena (a local who has lived here her entire life) and her husband Jimmy, a Colombian-American guy who was really cool.
Serena offers DELICIOUS lobster tails done up in garlic and they are fresh within the past few hours. She also offers whatever fish she gets from fisherman on any given day. She can COOK! She also knows how to pour a real drink unlike anywhere else on the island. Her rum punch is delicious and when asked for one she actually went and obtained a fresh pineapple from her yard to use in making it.
She also has a small turtle refuge right there where she takes care of sea turtles that have been injured by local poachers. When asked if we could touch them she immediately jumped into the water and grabbed one for us to play with. She couldn't have been more accommodating and was certainly the coolest person we met on the trip.
The Asylum is the ONLY place on the island where there are some signs indicating where it is, but they are small and you happen to see them by chance. The Asylum is in Camp Bay, about 30 mins from the main road. The road is in extremely poor condition and I won't lie, it's hell getting there and back. But it is definitely worth going, even if you go just once.
McNabb in Jonesville: This place is close to Hole in the Wall which is where we decided to eat after discovering the three old salts there. The food is so salty I felt like a slug, slowly dehydrating to death BUT it is worth going there for the monkey. I'm not talking about eating monkey but their actual pet monkey on a little leash. It's a little year and a half old brown spider monkey that is really friendly. It'll give little love bites but wont hurt you. Loves to climb all over and be swung around. I never liked monkeys but after messing with one they're pretty cool now. They also have an Amazon parrot which is pretty nice, and for some reason, an enclosure with three crocodiles and a few turtles. The monkey was so cool we actually went back a second time just to see it. The house next door also has a monkey on their dock as well as several macaws in their trees. Very cool stuff and a friendly couple who talked to us about their pet birds.
Jenny's Lusty Lizard (heading west past or before the airport, I think past, don't quite remember): Really cool place! It is run by Jenny, a friendly local who has a bar and small restaurant. She gives everyone who shows up a magic marker to write on the wall. The walls are covered with all sorts of names, sayings, and all of that. Grouper was delicious, beer was cold, atmosphere was friendly. We definitely suggest it!
Gio's in French Harbor: This place was sort of mediocre. Staff was nice and service was good but the food was...well...meh. Not bad, not great, but average. Seating outside on the patio above the water was nice and provided a nice view. It was also conveniently setup to provide a nice, comfortable breeze. I have no particular complaints. If you are driving a rental car be aware that parking in front of Gio's is able to take about 5 vehicles. When we were there a taxi was sideways taking up two spaces. We parked across the street in an abandoned lot next to a church. Don't hesitate to park wherever you want! French Harbor is a one lane street. If you can cram a car somewhere, do it! To get to Gio's, take the turn into French Harbor at the gas station and main taxi stop. Continue down the road until you hit a point where it is right or left. Turn right, continue until the road begins to wrap back around to the right. This will give you the best opportunity to utilize parking at Gio's or the abandoned lot.
BJ's Backyard in Oak Ridge: A more easily found location, continue down the road at the turnoff at Oak Ridge. Again, ask people where it is. I happened to run into Serena from Camp Bay who was in the back seat of a truck. Just so happened we were right in front of the turn to the place. When we arrived it was around 330 or 4pm. It was occupied by about 15 to 20 ex-pats. Three were doing a little live show, one playing lead guitar, one playing rhythm, and another guy playing a variety of harmonica, tambourine, etc. The music played was, of course, very American. I really can't stand Sweet Home Alabama, regardless of who plays it. The woman who appeared to be running things, I suspect was BJ, was pretty far out there. I mean...wayyyy far out there. I've only met a few people that cooked from LSD in the 1960's...
After a while EVERYONE cleared out. Ex-pats here apparently travel in packs, talking about themselves and their 'life stories'. Thanks, but no thanks. The worst was when one woman who told me she lived here for 6 years and said this was the least Americanized place she has been after having been to most of the islands in the Caribbean.
)
Further confusion over his choice of resorts- Subway runs a nice operation- likely the single best DM on the island is working there for Subway- but Turquoise Bay (TB) has never ever yet been regarded as a dive resort. It has always come off as a resort with some diving, and the resort part- well, most of the comments have paralleled those of TTC.
