Saying any of these nowadays will probably get you canned, but somedays it just might be worth it...
1. I can see your point, but I still think you're full of crap.
2. I don't know what your problem is, but I'll bet it's hard to pronounce.
3. How about never? Is never good for you?
4. I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
5. I'm really easy to get along with once you people learn to worship me.
6. I'll try being nicer if you'll try being smarter.
7. I'm out of my mind, but feel free to leave a message...
8. I don't work here. I'm a consultant.
9. It sounds like English, but I can't understand a word you're saying.
10. Ahhh...I see the f..k-up fairy has visited us again...
11. I like you. You remind me of when I was young and stupid.
12. You are validating my inherent mistrust of strangers.
13. I have plenty of talent and vision. I just don't give a damn.
14. Sorry, what was that - I was busy visualizing the duct tape over your mouth.
15. I will always cherish the initial misconceptions I had about you.
16. Thank you. We're all refreshed and challenged by your unique point of view.
17. The fact that no one understands you doesn't mean you're an artist.
18. Any connection between your reality and mine is purely coincidental.
19. What am I? Flypaper for freaks!?
20. I'm not being rude. You're just insignificant.
21. It's a thankless job, but I've got a lot of Karma to burn off.
22. Yes, I am an agent of Satan, but my duties are largely ceremonial.
23. And your cry-baby whiny opinion would be...?
24. Do I look like a people person?
25. I started out with nothing & still have most of it left.
26. If I throw a stick, will you leave?
27. Whatever kind of look you were going for, you missed.
28. I'm trying to imagine you with a personality.
29. Too many freaks, not enough circuses.
30. How do I set a laser printer to stun?
31. I thought I wanted a career, turns out I just wanted pay cheques.
32. This isn't an office, it's Hell with fluorescent lighting.
If anyone knows any more, feel free to add to this list.
1. I can see your point, but I still think you're full of crap.
2. I don't know what your problem is, but I'll bet it's hard to pronounce.
3. How about never? Is never good for you?
4. I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
5. I'm really easy to get along with once you people learn to worship me.
6. I'll try being nicer if you'll try being smarter.
7. I'm out of my mind, but feel free to leave a message...
8. I don't work here. I'm a consultant.
9. It sounds like English, but I can't understand a word you're saying.
10. Ahhh...I see the f..k-up fairy has visited us again...
11. I like you. You remind me of when I was young and stupid.
12. You are validating my inherent mistrust of strangers.
13. I have plenty of talent and vision. I just don't give a damn.
14. Sorry, what was that - I was busy visualizing the duct tape over your mouth.
15. I will always cherish the initial misconceptions I had about you.
16. Thank you. We're all refreshed and challenged by your unique point of view.
17. The fact that no one understands you doesn't mean you're an artist.
18. Any connection between your reality and mine is purely coincidental.
19. What am I? Flypaper for freaks!?
20. I'm not being rude. You're just insignificant.
21. It's a thankless job, but I've got a lot of Karma to burn off.
22. Yes, I am an agent of Satan, but my duties are largely ceremonial.
23. And your cry-baby whiny opinion would be...?
24. Do I look like a people person?
25. I started out with nothing & still have most of it left.
26. If I throw a stick, will you leave?
27. Whatever kind of look you were going for, you missed.
28. I'm trying to imagine you with a personality.
29. Too many freaks, not enough circuses.
30. How do I set a laser printer to stun?
31. I thought I wanted a career, turns out I just wanted pay cheques.
32. This isn't an office, it's Hell with fluorescent lighting.
If anyone knows any more, feel free to add to this list.
