What to do?

[Charlie59]

Hmmm, I'm not sure but I bet this is not the only habit of this friend you find annoying. maybe some couple conseling.

 

[DiveMaven]

This works with some people but others are only interested in their part of a conversation and don't want to listen to what others say. Some people ask a lot of questions of their conversation partner and pay attention to the responses others just ramble on not caring what the other person's input might be. They ask your opinion but it's just their way of being polite. Kind of like someone saying "How's it going?" most of the time they don't want a description of your day they expect you to reply with a one or two word answer and move on to what they want to talk about. DiveMe shouldn't be bothered by this and I'm not so sure she would change even if she knew how DM felt. It would be nice if she would but I wouldn't bet on it.

Thanks, you definitely nailed how it seems she is. Its funny that we've been friends for a lot longer than we've both been diving, but apparently I've never had this type of behavior directed at me before. The only thing I can think is that it's the first time we're equals in something that we have in common (we only have 2 big things in common, and I came into the first thing much later than she), and she doesn't know how to be equals with people. Thus far I've felt that the history of our friendship made working through this a priority, but lately I've been backing off of the friendship and making other choices. Fortunately, she isn't my dive buddy nor my partner/husband, only a friend who doesn't live close by who I only get together with a few times a year (we mostly talk on the phone and IMs).

Thanks to everyone for your replies, it really helps to feel like I'm on the right track.

 

[Walter]

Walter knows I love him dearly....
Ber :lilbunny:

And you know it's mutual.

 

[carldarl]

If you are interested, get a camera. Then, when you decide to take the plunge (so-to-speak) and dive with her, suggest she rent or barrow a camera as well. Showing her your fantastic pictures from previous dives will give you something to talk about. It is also an easy way to help her realize speed isn't the idea. Maybe she will learn to like underwater photography. Maybe not.

One thing I have found is there is no way to take good pictures and be in a hurry. Especialy if you get into macro shots. If she doesn't like it or can't slow herself down, it gives you a good reason to not buddy up with her. You simply can't shoot well and speed at the same time. That will help you opt out without ruining a friendship over a difference in diving priorities. Life is too short to let little things get to you...

 

[rlwalker]

Give her a light and tell her to look CLOSER!

 

[PaulChristenson]

This year is Tobermory again, it's the first vacation site I've been to a second time. I enjoyed it so much last year I had to go back again. That's a first for me!
Ber :lilbunny:

This guy's video isn't bad...

http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dl...sPageName=MERC_VIC_RSCC_Pr4_PcY_BID_Stores_IT

 

[grazie42]

I´m also one of those people who get bored on reefs.
I think it´s because I like to have a specific objective for my dives.

I do go slow, actually, on the last liveaboard me and my buddy were usually passed even by the second group to be dropped by zodiac (the zodiac went back and picked up the 2nd group from the boat)...

I have found that having a camera really helps against the boredom because I can focus on getting the "perfect" shot of a nudibranch, clownfish or whatever. Still by the end of the week the dives I enjoyed were the coral caves and the few wrecks we did dive...

Just accept that people are different and enjoy different things...

 

[Ber Rabbit]

This guy's video isn't bad...

http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dl...sPageName=MERC_VIC_RSCC_Pr4_PcY_BID_Stores_IT

Wish he had a "Buy Now" option, I'm not versed enough in ebay to be bidding.
Ber :lilbunny:

 

[Diver Dennis]

Now, now. I said I enjoy NICE reefs, a lush reef reef is one thing, one that's been beaten to a pile of rubble and dead coral is another and unfortunately those are the easiest to find. What's wrong with enjoying a quarry anyway? Oh wait, its "boring"


Glad to see you know me well enough to say that I do see but it's like a television program, the little critters defend their territory, they eat, they nest and some clean bigger critters. My husband can sit and watch the same movie time and time again, once I've seen it I'm usually done with it unless it's something I really enjoyed and then it's worth a second look but rarely a third. Now if I have a camera with me and am hunting for critters to take pictures of that's something for me to "do" and I can spend all day on the reef.

Why is it that I'm not allowed to enjoy cold water and wrecks? Everyone is different that's what makes us special.
Ber :lilbunny:

Sorry Ber, I meant the woman in the original post...

 

[PaulChristenson]

Wish he had a "Buy Now" option, I'm not versed enough in ebay to be bidding.
Ber :lilbunny:

Bid the minimum...with him its like a buy now option...if someone outbids the minimum...let it go because he is always posting these for sale...

That's how I got mine...