Advice for traveling without dive buddy

[Kharon]

My solution is to go to places where there is lot's of shore diving and dive solo. It's a bit harder to get reasonable accomodations because most places are double occupancy, but it can be done.

 

[Teamcasa]

My assumption: You plan on spending big money to go and dive some exotic site and want some assurance that you get your money's worth by diving with a competent diver right?
As a diver that has also spent real money on trips with my diver wife, we also want the same but as a videographer/photographer my dive plan varies greatly from the norm. At those exotic sites where having a DM was mandatory (I try to avoid them as much as possible) I simply budget a few extra dollars for a private DM to accompany us on the dives. The DM is given very clear instructions to allow me to set the pace (as I stop frequently and for long periods) and not to go zooming around trying to show me the places and critters he/she believes I'd like.

Bottom line, hire a buddy and hope the vis is outstanding! You will rarely be disappointed.

 

[lv2dive]

First of all... the insta-buddy issue is near and dear to my own heart. I have had great experiences and - as others have mentioned - not so great experiences. I met one of my (now) very best dive friends/buddies completely randomly as an instabuddy on a NC charter. And I've had other good experiences, as well.

OTOH - the last time I went out on a NC charter without a buddy, although I had a great experience the first dive, the second dive, my buddy and I were just coming from two very different places. Neither one was right or wrong, but they were very different, and, frankly, not compatible. I'm going to have a hard time going out in NC again without a known buddy. My family is from Morehead City and I've been home several times and not gone out bc I haven't had a known buddy... this last time I went bc it had been a year, and well, I missed my wrecks! But, the risk is just not worth it to me. Another example... went to the Bahamas this spring for a family vacation, got there a day early (before family) and planned on diving a couple days in the middle of the trip... but after watching people with "years" of experience and "hundreds" or "thousands" of dives (not to mention five figure camera equipment) kick the crap out the reef, including obliterating barrel sponges and knocking over huge fans - I had to hang up my fins after the first day. ANYHOO...

...I totally get what you are saying - and so that I am not misunderstood - Let me just repeat that I have no problem diving with a buddy that is less experienced, or even fresh out of their OW cert. I am happy to help a fellow diver. I have very often assisted others on the boat with getting their gear set up correctly, given advice on proper weighting, explained to them how to check their buoyancy, discussed dive plans, kept an extra-watchful eye on them if I think they needed it, taken some of their weight off them on the bottom if they were still over-weighted, even once had to grab a guys leg to keep him down as he began to uncontrollably ascend. I am sure that many of the fellow SB members do the same on their dive trips.

Nice to hear you are happy to dive with an inexperienced diver - I, too, am happy to dive with "inexperienced" divers. In some of the environments I dive in, *I* am the inexperienced diver, and I appreciate patience shown me <G>. In general, I just like to dive with people who have good situational awareness and buddy skills, who know where their skill level actually is, overall, and are out to have a safe fun dive. One question your post made me think of, though... are these divers *asking* you for your help with weighting, gear setup, buoyancy, etc? I only ask, bc with 25-50 dives, *most* divers level of expertise might not be quite at the mentoring level, and advice - no matter how well-meant - might not be well-received. In general, I try to refrain from giving advice - unless it's specifically asked for, or there is a significant safety concern. Which meant, I needed to just stop diving, on the above-referenced Bahamas trip. I *wanted* to give a lot of advice but refrained. First of all, it wasn't any of my business, and even if everyone that day suddenly became perfect divers it wasn't going to make a difference long-term... more importantly, any advice I would have given would have either irritated/confused/embarrassed/fallen on deaf ears. Luckily, I had alternate plans that trip so I could just stop diving. Anyway, I guess I would just note that it has worked well for me, to consider the bigger picture before dispensing advice.

The point of my original post is that there have been times when there are maybe 8 people on the boat (including myself), and 6 are already partnered up. There is only 1 other person (plus myself) that have no buddy. So naturally that lone diver is the one I am most probably going to be partnered up with, unless I want to tag along as a threesome. There have been times where that lone diver is a fantastic buddy! But there have also been just as many times when he really doesn't belong in the water. We are certified so that we have the basic skills needed for good / safe diving. I am sometimes shocked that some divers got their C-card and yet lack or are unfamiliar with these skills.

Yep, been there done that. And I've had much better success, when I asked a competent buddy pair if I could dive with them Always an option.

Best of luck finding buddies/teammates. I have to admit, it is very relaxing/enjoyable to dive with regular buddies!

 

[sixt3denied]

My assumption: You plan on spending big money to go and dive some exotic site and want some assurance that you get your money's worth by diving with a competent diver right?
As a diver that has also spent real money on trips with my diver wife, we also want the same but as a videographer/photographer my dive plan varies greatly from the norm. At those exotic sites where having a DM was mandatory (I try to avoid them as much as possible) I simply budget a few extra dollars for a private DM to accompany us on the dives. The DM is given very clear instructions to allow me to set the pace (as I stop frequently and for long periods) and not to go zooming around trying to show me the places and critters he/she believes I'd like.

Bottom line, hire a buddy and hope the vis is outstanding! You will rarely be disappointed.

Yeah, good point. Maybe it's worth spending the extra cash on a private DM after all. There have been times when i want to explore a spot more thoroughly but the dive guide seems to be in a race to cover as much ground as possible - LOL. I will look into it on my next dive trip.

---------- Post Merged at 01:07 PM ---------- Previous Post was at 12:34 PM ----------

One question your post made me think of, though... are these divers *asking* you for your help with weighting, gear setup, buoyancy, etc? I only ask, bc with 25-50 dives, *most* divers level of expertise might not be quite at the mentoring level, and advice - no matter how well-meant - might not be well-received. In general, I try to refrain from giving advice - unless it's specifically asked for, or there is a significant safety concern. Which meant, I needed to just stop diving, on the above-referenced Bahamas trip. I *wanted* to give a lot of advice but refrained. First of all, it wasn't any of my business, and even if everyone that day suddenly became perfect divers it wasn't going to make a difference long-term... more importantly, any advice I would have given would have either irritated/confused/embarrassed/fallen on deaf ears.

katepnatl - Let me first thank you for a great reply to my post! As far as other divers asking me for help.... In the past I generally see that someone is having a hard time with something. Whether it be that they can't get their gear set up, or they stand over the weight box and look completely lost as to how much weight they should grab, or I notice that their gauge console is not attached to their BCD, and its hose is stuck under their BCD strap etc etc etc. I will try and help that person out if I see that they are having a problem. I got certified when I was 20. I am 43. I stopped diving for a number of years so i have begun a new log book and have reset my dive-counter to my recent # of dives. Not going to count dives I did back when i was in my early twenties - LOL. I do not claim to be an expert by any means. But i pay attention to detail, am careful, cautious, try to plan ahead, always work on my buoyancy and air consumption, and overall hold my own. I too have seen people crash into the reef, stir up silt and sand - crash into a swim through with their tanks, stand on the reef without a second thought about it. It is shocking! But I am not one of those people. I consider myself a responsible diver. But i have no doubt there is much I can learn from more experienced divers. One of the reasons why I love this forum, and love hearing opinions from divers such as yourself!

---------- Post Merged at 01:12 PM ---------- Previous Post was at 12:34 PM ----------

I have a blog on "instabuddies" and include a few exerpts here for your further review:

When I have to dive with a "stranger," I pair up as early as possible, and talk to them. I ask about their last trip, their last dive, how long they have been diving. I look at their gear (brand new, rental, seasoned but well maintained, crappy, etc.) I tell them a little about me in the same areas. I ask if they have any objective for the dive ( want to go 100 feet, see a shark, find an eel, take pictures, etc.) It can all be a very friendly conversation. Within a few minutes we are not strangers. I then... work the conversation into a meaningful planned dive, with buddy check, orientation to each other's equipment, air use expectation and etc..... I have never had anyone object to the talk, and it leads to good planning, and good buddy habits in the water. Just be postitive, be nice, and be interested in learning about the other person. If there is a repetitive dive, let them know any changes you'd like, again in a positive manner- such as the roaming buddy issue. Say "that was a great dive, but I was a little tense when you took off after that ray. I'm more comfortable if we stay closer together as a buddy team. Is that ok with you? Just be pleasant and positive. ....

I really think if you take a positive approach you will have a better time. And you might find that your instabuddy can be alright if you communicate plan, and have a decent attitude.
DivemasterDennis

DivemasterDennis - I always look forward to reading your posts! Always informative! Thank You!!!!!

 

[Tigerman]

Yeah, good point. Maybe it's worth spending the extra cash on a private DM after all. There have been times when i want to explore a spot more thoroughly but the dive guide seems to be in a race to cover as much ground as possible - LOL. I will look into it on my next dive trip.
...

Thats where scouting out the boat and finding the guy travelling alone with his UW camera and making sure you buddy up with him before the DM assign you a buddy is a great thing to do

 

[DandyDon]

Most of my dive trips have been alone. No biggie. Insta-buddies are what got me to get my pony bottle, but it's a good idea anyway. Rental car & hotel costs can be more, but sometimes not so much. Even when my home bud goes with me, we like private rooms each, no snoring to listen to other than my own, and - likeable guy, but I wouldn't want to depend on him still. There is always a risk of getting assigned a buddy who should have hired his own DM to help him learn, but usually not so bad.

 

[DevonDiver]

Seems to do that (assumptions) quite a lot.

Please let me know what you feel my assumptions are.

As a working dive pro, I've accompanied 0000's of divers in the water. All of them insta-buddies, by definition - the majority of whom had relatively little scuba experience. That experience tends to give dive pros a fair indication of the scope and composition of problems that can, and will, be encountered.

Dive pros don't have the luxury of 'being picky' about their dive buddies. They have to keep themselves, and their buddies, safe on every occasion - day-in, day-out. Do you hear dive pros whinging about insta-buddies? No. They ensure their own safety and determine the conduct and parameters of their dives (and divers) for a satisfactory outcome.

My opinion is, there is no 'unsolvable' issue with regards to insta-buddies. It's a common scape-goat for personal failure. Where divers experience such issues, their first point of reflection should be upon their own approach to the dive; how they prepared and conducted dives with an unknown diver, how they instituted measures to ensure safety, team-work and mutually understood parameters.

In giving my advice, I try not to perpetuate this 'victim culture' of insta-buddy blame. Yes, problems exist ("I feel your pain"), but solutions also exist. Where possible, I try and focus on positive solutions beyond the ubiquitous advice to "avoid them" or "dive solo". Such advice only serves to avoid the symptoms, not the cure the cause.

With regards to 'assumptions'...if you take any field of work, in which you have little/no experience, and talk to someone who's been employed in that field for decades, would you dismiss their experience and input as 'assumptions' or 'arrogance'? I doubt it, unless you truly have ego problems.

The fact is, myself and others, have presented the OP with answers to his questions. He didn't like those answers. He didn't want those answers. Thus, they are dismissed as irrelevant assumptions etc. I find that rude and disrespectful.. especially when those people are contributing good-heartedly for nobody's benefit except the OP. Such an attitude wouldn't be shown in real-life...they (you) wouldn't have the courage or confidence to talk like that to a dive pro in a dive center,... but it seems easy to be noxious and disrespectful via the internet.

 

[sixt3denied]

Come down off your soap-box. Many of your answers to my question were irrelevant and inaccurate because you actually didn't answer my question.

So i guess the next time you get buddied up with an incompetent diver, make sure you blame yourself for their incompetence- not them. It is obviously your fault. You are obviously a poor buddy. That's the summary of your ridiculous response to my post. I'll keep that in mind the next time i have a buddy that cant maintain buoyancy and tags along 25 feet above me on my next dive. Maybe i should tie a string to him like he is a kite? This way i can reel him in when he begins drifting to the surface. Maybe i should discuss proper weighting in detail before we descend? Then hold on to his power inflator and deflate/inflate his BCD for him? Blow air into his mask to equalize it? Signal him as to when he should equalize his ears? Check his console for him? Tie rope to his fins so i can maneuver him like a puppet - so i can make sure he doesn't land on the reef or stir up silt?

No- i'm pretty sure that is HIS job. He is a CERTIFIED diver. He is supposed to he competent on his own. You dive with a buddy for safety purposes. Not to have your hand held.


Enough said......



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[DevonDiver]

Come down off your soap-box. Many of your answers to my question were irrelevant and inaccurate because you actually didn't answer my question.

Yes, I did. It just wasn't the answer you had hoped for... which begs the question why you asked in the first place...

I get the feeling you just wanted to be told how great a diver you were, how bad luck for you that your insta-buddies sucked...and that you should ditch them, maybe go solo... or find some elite clique of divers who'd be prepared to hang with you...

So i guess the next time you get buddied up with an incompetent diver, make sure you blame yourself for their incompetence- not them. It is obviously your fault. You are obviously a poor buddy. That's the summary of your ridiculous response to my post.

Yes, that's a good summary. It's exactly what I described when I mentioned what dive pros encounter...and succeed with.. every working day.

If you find that ridiculous, then perhaps you should ask yourself how you ever became a diver? Obviously 'someone' had the capacity to endure your noobie incompetence and get you safely through sufficient dives to the point was reached where you were no longer a liability..

If the idea of being a buddy to a developing diver seems like a 'drama' to you... then, as I suggested, the reason for that state of mind is probably due to your own need to develop further capacity.

I make a living out of developing divers. I don't care how good, or how bad they are - I will keep them safe and make the dives enjoyable. If I can do that...and most experienced divers/pros can do that.... and you cannot... then perhaps it's not so 'ridiculous'. Perhaps, you just need to see a bigger picture?

I'll keep that in mind the next time i have a buddy that cant maintain buoyancy and tags along 25 feet above me on my next dive. Maybe i should tie a string to him like he is a kite? This way i can reel him in when he begins drifting to the surface. Maybe i should discuss proper weighting in detail before we descend? Then hold on to his power inflator and deflate/inflate his BCD for him? Blow air into his mask to equalize it? Signal him as to when he should equalize his ears? Check his console for him? Tie rope to his fins so i can maneuver him like a puppet - so i can make sure he doesn't land on the reef or stir up silt?

As mentioned. Plenty of divers achieve this every day. If it's a drama for you...and you don't know how to answer the questions you just posed... then, again, some necessity for self-reflection is evidently required.

No- i'm pretty sure that is HIS job. He is a CERTIFIED diver. He is supposed to he competent on his own. You dive with a buddy for safety purposes. Not to have your hand held.

You still don't grasp the concept of the 'buddy system' do you?

Enough said......

It's you that's desperate to find people to dive with. Enough said...

 

[sixt3denied]

Yes - you are 100 percent right. Thank you for your valuable input. Dive safe


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