Dork Divers Manifesto

[diverdan214]

Don't feel bad because you're not a NADD you get to be ADHA (Advanced Dork-Highlands Diver)

There's nothing quite like diving in Scotland, wearing a Drysuit underwater and a Kilt abovewater...in July!

 

[fisherdvm]

Why can't you be a dork diver if you care about trimix?

If you dive trimix with a snorkel, tank banger, and split fins, you can apply for an exception to the Dork Diver society. Send a $30 processing fee and photographic proof of your gears to me, the official treasurer.

 

[J.R.]

One of the best things I've heard in years... two questions though:

1: on the 'no flaming thing'... I'm kinda' good with this... but how about just "crispy browning" as a result of properly placed indignation??? "Golden Glow"???

2: SAC really is important... its helpful when ya' pack your Slim Jim's and other post-dive snacky treats...

Other than that... I'll take 2 XL shirts and a magnetic bumper sticker that I can smack on my steel tanks...

I'm shining up my old Scubapro dive knife of many, many years ago... you know the ones... leg sheath, 3/8 of an inch thick back on the blade... 7 inches of glowing stainless (... and ya' KNOW it's seven inches because it has a ruler etched into the blade!!!)

Rock on...

 

[MBH]

SAC rate is VERY important. Every diver needs to know their surface alcohol consumption rate.

 

[shellim123]

I think the tshirt should incorporate a snorkle and plaid split fins

Hey, I need plaid split fins! But there has to be some purple in them to match my beer bong...er..I mean....snorkel

 

[shellim123]

SAC rate is VERY important. Every diver needs to know their surface alcohol consumption rate.

Good point!

 

[J.R.]

Uh... got a question... so, like... ummm... I wuzn't anticipating the development of DD.. I wuz' in my LDS yesterday and bought a set of twin jet max fins... now, in all honesty, I didn't buy them because they are *cool*... or because they'll prevent me from dying... I needed new fins and they fit and they were black and blue (which matchs the rest of my ensamble...)... so, like, is it "Un-Dorkish" to have these? Do I need to take them back and break out my OLD rubber jets of years gone past? Do I need to get a SECOND tank bannger to compensate?

I mean... I don't want to be un-dorkish or to tarnish the image of fellow dorks everywhere...

... please advise...

 

[under water]

bought a set of twin jet max fins... ... so, like, is it "Un-Dorkish" to have these?
I mean... I don't want to be un-dorkish or to tarnish the image of fellow dorks everywhere...

... please advise...

They're splits.. your safe! Totally dorkish.

 

[wreckedinri]

If one becomes an official Dork Diver, are they allowed to dive with non-Dork Divers? Cuz right now I dive with some people that are not Dorks, but they are good divers and are fun to be with!

On another note; can I get a can Koozy (very important for SAC) instead of a license plate frame once I pass the Dork Diver Introductory Class?

 

[fisherdvm]

If one becomes an official Dork Diver, are they allowed to dive with non-Dork Divers? Cuz right now I dive with some people that are not Dorks, but they are good divers and are fun to be with!

On another note; can I get a can Koozy (very important for SAC) instead of a license plate frame once I pass the Dork Diver Introductory Class?

The key thing about being a Dork Diver is you must evangelize. Why dive with dorks when you can stand out diving with DIR.

Your pink split fin, yellow snorkel, and flourescent gears with stand out against the black suit and gears of DIR divers.

It is imperative for dorks to NOT dive with other dorks.