Anyone boat crew, DM or other person that touches my gear will get one, and only one, warning that they are to leave my gear alone until and unless they are cutting me out of it. After that, they should be prepared for two things.
First, the sudden feeling of flight as they loft gently through the air into the water. Second, the sight of me leaving their boat as soon as it docks so that I can find another operator.
The only people I trust enough to touch my gear are my dive buddies. And they are usually busy setting up their rigs.
I let the crew hand me deco bottles that I secure to my rig. All other assemblies, particularly including valve manipulation, are my responsibility.
After hearing all the bad DM stories, particularly in the Carribean and overseas, I cannot understand why anyone would be so lazy that they can't deal with their own rig. In fact, given the fact that Carribean divers use AL80's and almost no weight, I can't see why anyone competant enough to get in the water would even need the help.
Which part of your life support are you going to trust to someone else? And why?
As for one of them watching me, they are welcome to do so. However, I don't talk during my setups and will not change anything on my rig regardless of their opinion, so the only point would be to find a setup error.
Finally, let's be clear that Bug didn't do anything wrong. Bug was not obligated to buddy up with this walking disaster. She did it to herself and got precisely what she deserved.