insta buddy nightmares

[cloudflint]

I remember being asked to lead a couple of divers on a dive who came out with my dive club as guests. I took them in and the water was pitch black and only about half a meter vis. I instructed them to stay off my left shoulder and not to get more than an arms length apart from me or each other. So we go down and they immediately start bobbing up and down like yoyo's then one unbeknownst to me dropped his torch and when he realised this decided to suddenly turn 90 degrees and swim away. So I swim after him dragging the other guy along with me then grab both of them and lift them to the surface. On the surface I again told them that in these conditions we had to stay close and keep and eye on each other.

So we go back down and carry on and this time their buoyancy is better but one of them keeps sticking his head into holes in the rock to see what's in there so I keep having to turn around and tap him on the shoulder to get him to keep following us. The outher guy stays true to my word and stays within about an arms length. unfotunatley he spends most of his time hanging upside own directly above me so l look round and he is gone. I do a full 360 turn and cant see him anywhere so I start thinking of swimming search patterns then I suddenly hear a noise and look up and there he is however upsideown above me finning like mad to stay down so I grab him and pull him down and get him neutral only to discover of course that while I was doing this the outher guy has swam away and has his head in a hole so I swim over and grab him and carried on with the dive basically with me physically dragging them along to stop them running off . When I eventually finished the dive they complained that they never got a "good swim".

On the outher side I went on to a dive site in a group of 5 and only one of us had dived there before so we agreed that they should lead since they where a dive leader (SSAC equivelant of DM) and had dived the site before. So we go in as 2 pairs with us all following the dive leader up front. the moment we hit the water the dive leader shoots away at full tilt. they continued in this vein for 40 minutes not looking around or paying any attention to what was happening around them.

Eventually my buddy started running low on air so I gave it my all and managed to swim fast enough to catch the dive leader and indicated that my buddy was low on air and that we should ascend. So we all ascend and the shore is a distant ribbon in the distance. It took me and my buddy 45 minutes to swim back with me eventually having to tow my buddy for the last 10 minutes or so. The rest of my group swam at 45 degrees to the shore to get back to the entry point but i figured my buddy would never make it so just headed straight for land, dumped the gear then had to climb over some cliffs to get back once I had my buddy back i then swam our gear round the coast back to our entry point.

The main thing I learnt on these dives is to never trust anyone i haven't dived with before. Its served me well on similar occasions that have happened since.

 

[jnorris]

This is the main thing that concerns me with diving now that I have my c-card. My wife does not dive, so when we go on our vacations I will be in insta-buddy land. I am pretty conservative and careful, and I would love to be paired with someone who feels the same way. But as illustrated in this thread it's a crap-shoot as to what kind of buddy you might get paired with. I'm still learning, and I want to learn. I really don't want to end up chasing someone around in the water just for the sake of staying with my "buddy". That doesn't seem to be the proper application of the "buddy system".

What do you experienced divers suggest as a way to mitigate this situation?

 

[DevonDiver]

If I am not happy with my allocated buddy, I won't dive with them again. It's the DM's job to pair divers, so I'd let them sort it out, once I had politely communicated my concerns and requirements to them.

If the available buddies are so bad that I won't enjoy the dive, then I'll expect the DM to do something about that - it is what I pay them for. If they cannot, or will not, then I will be clear to them that I will expect a refund.

I know the dive industry well....and I know what my money is supposed to buy. If I don't get that, then I'll go elsewhere.

Of course, it's easy to avoid that disappointment if you make your expectations very clear to the DM in advance. They may run a cattle-boat, but I am not prepared to suffer in silence like just another member of the herd.

 

[Abidon]

We go into the drift dives of Cozumel...

On my first trip to Cozumel in Mar 09...

Went diving in the Mayan...

In Cozumel...

Remind me to never go diving in Mexico. :grinbandit:

 

[Aaron528]

This is the main thing that concerns me with diving now that I have my c-card. My wife does not dive, so when we go on our vacations I will be in insta-buddy land. I am pretty conservative and careful, and I would love to be paired with someone who feels the same way. But as illustrated in this thread it's a crap-shoot as to what kind of buddy you might get paired with. I'm still learning, and I want to learn. I really don't want to end up chasing someone around in the water just for the sake of staying with my "buddy". That doesn't seem to be the proper application of the "buddy system".

What do you experienced divers suggest as a way to mitigate this situation?

After a few really bad experiences, I learned to approach the DM right away to discuss a buddy assignment (often before the boat has even left the dock), because sometimes they want to pick and other times they prefer you pair yourself. Either way, I like to sit down with the prospective person and I begin by making small talk, asking about their previous experience and asking what kind of a dive they have in mind (if the dive isn't led). If I get an answer that even hints at a lack of teamwork, I may give a brief story illustrating a previous negative experience and suggesting it would be great for us to work together to have a good dive. This has to be done very tactfully, or the person may feel they are being accused of something. There were 2 occasions (out of 50+ dives) where I requested a change because the talk didn't seem to go well. I haven't had any serious buddy mishaps since I began this approach.

 

[jnorris]

Of course, it's easy to avoid disappointment if you make your expectations very clear to the DM in advance.

This is something I definitely plan to do. Makes good sense! Thanks for your input.

I learned to approach the DM right away to discuss a buddy assignment (often before the boat has even left the dock)....I like to sit down with the prospective person and I begin by making small talk, asking about their previous experience and asking what kind of a dive they have in mind (if the dive isn't led).

All good advice. I definitely plan to take this approach. Thanks for taking time to comment.

 

[drbill]

I dive mostly solo for a number of reasons including the fact that most other regular divers here are professionals and don't have time to do fun dives. Another reason is the experience I've had with insta-buddies.

1. A lovely Japanese woman asked me to be her dive buddy. I couldn't pass this up. She took hold of my hand the minute we began walking down the steps at the dive park and didn't release it until we started to walk back up after the dive. Since I was carrying my camera in my other hand, this made it very difficult to adjust my BC as we dove. And she released her grip as soon as we were back on dry land.

2. An insta-buddy was doing fairly well at the beginning of our dive. I stopped to take some video, watching her in the reflection in my rear port. She moved out of sight but I kept filming since it was a rare opportunity. When I looked up she was nowhere to be seen. I searched the bottom for a few minutes and ascended, but couldn't see her anywhere. We were in a more remote area of the dive park so I descended again to look some more. When I got back to the stairs to call for help, I found her standing in street clothes with a group of guys heading out to get some drinks. I asked why she left without telling me. She said "I knew you'd be OK" to which I replied "Yes, but I didn't know you would be... I've been searching for your body."

 

[Rythmmaker]

I usually am with someone I know and trust, but have been paired up randomly a few few times. Most of the time it went very well, and I have on several occasions been paired up with someone much more experienced, and had the opportunity to learn from it.

I remember doing a shark dive in Honduras where my insta-buddy seemed surprised that on the way to the dive site I wanted to review communication skills, separation procedures and to take a close look at his rig so I knew how to release his weights and to make sure I knew how his inflator and dump valves worked. His comment, "wow, you must be a pretty serious and advanced diver..." Um, no, (I had only about 30 dives at the time) I just want to make sure we both get back on the boat safely. The dive went well, and there were no issues, but it still surprised me to realize that a lot of folks either never learned some common sense safety skills or have gotten so complacent that they just don't bother. Even though we were told that there would be significant current at the dive site, he had no SMB or signalling device and was diving without any exposure protection. (Yes, the water was warm, but in the event of being separated from the boat, 3 miles offshore, it seemed like a smart idea to be wearing a 1.5mm full suit to me...) The current WAS very strong - pennant diving for sure - and it would have been pretty easy to get swept away if you lost your grip on the anchor or tag line.

 

[SelkieDVM]

I've not had any instabuddy nightmares, but I feel such anxiety and a sense of responsibility about it that I got a solo diving cert. Now I'm pursuing GUE training, in order to be able dive with folks with much less stress, even if I've never actually meet them.

 

[James R]

I am fortunate enough to be able to work as a DM on a local charter (Lake Travis Scuba). Of course I have been paired up with some "interesting" divers. I had to rescue one diver twice in one charter, in fact. That day was full of lessons on how we can improve as an operation, that's for sure.

Sometimes experienced divers put their nose up in the air and act as if they are too cool for school and way too good to go dive with someone with less experience. I guess they forget that once upon a time, they were that person. Now, all that being said, a diver that is just reckless, careless, or selfish for no good reason is a completely different story.