Ways to freak out a new dive buddy onboard

[HBDiveGirl]

Won't I sink to the bottom with 3000 pounds in my tank?

How does this dive computer read your nitrogen content through your wetsuit? (I've actually heard that one)

Spit in your wetsuit and pee in your mask.

Let's go get narced.

I'm laughing out loud in the cubicle!!!! STop-stop....they're going to come in and wonder what's going on......
"....through your wetsuit....." *gasp-ack-giggle*

 

[SoCalAngel]

Tell them your name is Fred and have been looking for a dive buddy for quite some time now.

I was dying on Sunday and now I just almost wet myself laughing.... :lol2:

 

[dlndavid]

I guess you had to be there to get that one, made it home safe did you?

 

[underwaterangel]

I guess you had to be there to get that one, made it home safe did you?

Ok this just BEGS for an explaination.....

 

[diverrick]

Hey!! Fred is just a lonely man looking for some company.... Right?.... Right?..... well..... maybe not. If nothing else I really want to meet this guy now, he seems to be such an interesting person from what I gather. Maybe I should lurk down at breakwater more often.

 

[dlndavid]

Ok this just BEGS for an explaination.....

Read these these threads;

This one first. You don't have to read the whole thing.
Fred

Then this one, the last page (pg 4 post #39).
We met Fred

 

[SoCalAngel]

I guess you had to be there to get that one, made it home safe did you?

*warning....THREAD HIJACK IN PROGRESS*
Shame on you for trying to get DEAD thread resurectted. Didn't we talk about this on Sunday? Do you need more therapy.... :06:

Still in San Jose. Still dying and rolling regarding Fred. Diving tomorrow (wednesday night) at Butterfly reef in Carmel. Can't Wait!!!!"

*end of hijack, thank you for your patience in this matter*

Ok, I thought of one more...

Tell them to he** with the environment. You are out for the thrill of the kill!


oh, wait.... I forgot about this...I sometimes do say this in jest, but newbies think I am very, very serious...

The most dangerous thing in the water? Oh, that would definately be the ever vicious, super aggresive, attacking sea urchins. They are everywhere and attack in packs. They have hideous spines that NEVER come out of your body. The spines work their way into your blood stream and stop your heart. That is when they move in for the final blow. To your brain!

 

[zor]

I'm waiting to try this one out, but on a more experienced diver, possibly my instructor.

put alkaseltzer in their bc pockets, then watch them look really worried as tiny bubbles start rushing out of their equipment!

 

[BabyDuck]

put alkaseltzer in their bc pockets, then watch them look really worried as tiny bubbles start rushing out of their equipment!

that's hilarious!

 

[FreeFloat]

I'm waiting to try this one out, but on a more experienced diver, possibly my instructor.

put alkaseltzer in their bc pockets, then watch them look really worried as tiny bubbles start rushing out of their equipment!

I know some divers that need to have that done to them!

Better yet, I can put the Alka-Seltzer in my pockets, and look innocent when I start foaming from every seam!