Take the test:
Ask yourself the following questions and answer them as honestly as you can.
1. Do you lose time from work due to going to Cozumel?
Of course not. That's what all the overtime is for.
2. Is your constant talking about diving Cozumel making your home life unhappy?
Of course not my wife and I have the same problem. So we're happy.
3. Do you go to Cozumel because you are shy with other people?
No that's why we bought a house in Cozumel so we could make new friends and visit with the neighbors
4. Are trips to Cozumel affecting your reputation?
Absolutely not. That's why I became a scuba instructor.
5. Have you ever felt remorse after returning from Cozumel?
Of course. Not being able to wear shorts to work. It's boots, dress shirt and tie.
6. Have you gotten into financial difficulties as a result of trips to Cozumel?
No, that why I took a second job teaching scuba.
7. Do you turn to lower companions and an inferior environment when vacatoning in Cozumel? No, do that at home. Diving Lake DeGray in Arkansas with 2 to 6 foot of vis and no marine life.
8. Does your fixation on Cozumel make you careless of your family's welfare?
No. Thanks to my wife being down in Cozumel all summer she does up keep on the house and this allows me to teach more scuba classes while she dives.
9. Has your ambition decreased since going to Cozumel?
No. I'm up at 4:30 this morning in Cozumel typing this questionaire waiting for daylight so I can get started working on the house.
10. Do you crave a dive in Cozumel at a definite time of day?
Yes. Preferably while I'm driving the 45 miles to work each morning.
11. Do you want a dive in Cozumel the next morning?
Yes. But have to dive in the university or shop pool twice a week instead.
12. Does thinking about your next trip to Cozumel cause you to have difficulty in sleeping?
Not at all. Have my checklist memorized.
13. Has your efficiency decreased since returning from Cozumel?
No. Come back to work so I can rest, relax and focus on the job.
14. Are trips to Cozumel jeopardizing your job or business?
No. There are always plenty of criminals to put in jail. I just have a better attitude after a week or two in Cozumel.
15. Do you go to Cozumel to escape from worries or trouble?
No. I put the bad guys in jail before I leave.
16. Do you dive Cozumel alone?
Absolutely. Night dives and being a camera buff make for same day same ocean syndrome.
17. Have you ever had a complete loss of memory as a result of diving Cozumel?
How many dives did we do today? Do you remember where I left the car keys?
18. Has your physician ever treated you for diving Cozumel?
Yes. Just had a physical so I can teach the new Public Safety Diver Course.
19. Do you brag about your trips to Cozumel to build up your self-confidence?
No need to everyone already knows that air is optional in my tank.
20. Have you ever been to a hospital or institution on account of diving Cozumel?
Had tours of the dive chambers on Cozumel. Visited with Dr. Piccolo on decompression studies and have his numbers on speed dial.
If you have answered YES to any one of the questions, there is a definite warning that you may be a Cozumelholic.
If you have answered YES to any two, the chances are that you are a Cozumelholic.
If you have answered YES to three or more, you are definitely a Cozumelholic.
(Apologies to Robert V. Seliger, MD, Johns Hopkins University Hospital.)
