I f*** up and I am ashamed

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I dive with 4kg of lead. I struggle a bit to go down but once I reach 2m with a full tank, it is fine. I hold my 5 m safety stop at the end of the dive with no issue however if I reach 2 meters at the end of the dive, I will surface and will not be able to go down after. Some tell me that I should dive with 5 kg but I refuse.

You found yourself in a bad situation, and you did well to get yourself out. Yes, the DM played a big role in that he should have briefed you about the cavern, made sure you were comfortable with it, and made sure that you had lights.

But as we all know, serious diving accidents are made up of a string of contributing, seemingly inconsequential actions.

For me, the bigger issue issue is your stubborness not to carry extra weight, when you know you need it, and have been told by others that you need it.

Things will go wrong in diving - someone else causing it, the environment causing it, you causing it. But by starting out with a less than ideal situation and attitude, you are always diving one error closer to a serious accident.
 
I may be a heretic on the subject of being perfectly weighted at the safety stop with 500psi, but I have always thought that was a bit of an impractical goal. I have never had a problem with being 2# overweighted, but have had a problem with not enough weight. Also, consider this: Unless you are diving with your own weights, and weigh them with some degree of regularity, you likely have no idea of exactly how much lead you actually have on your rig. You may be using the dive op's weights, which probably have been banging around on the boat, in the weight bin, dropped on the concrete, etc., for decades, resulting in some loss of lead over the years. Also, I'll bet the manufacturing process of casting weights has fluctuation in tolerances. Using my own weights as example, I have a bunch of commercially manufactured two and three pound weights, none of which weigh what is stamped. None weigh more than stamped, but the 3# weights show the most variation, in some cases 4-6 ounces light. So if you wind up with less than expected actual lead on your gear, and you are trying to achieve that "perfectly weighted" safety stop, you might be screwing yourself, especially if you wind up at the safety stop with less than 500#. Yes, of course we are all such superlative divers that such a situation could never occur, and the safety stop could be blown off, but why aggravate yourself trying to achieve weight perfection when your weights are not perfect.
 
So you scared the crap out of yourself and survived. You are making progress toward being a real diver.

Going into dark places that you can not see and without a light is unwise but that might have been a sort of spur of the moment decision.

But why did you knowingly dive with improper ballast?

Having too little to completely stop your ascent at any depth is critical. What if a boat does not see you and is in gear and you float up into the props? Isn't this something you thought about before and considered?

Is the reason you carry too little lead some sort of pride or competitive attitude or a mind set that good divers need less lead? I am really curious why you chose to dive like that?
 
I am always over weighted as I find instabuddies who are underweighted for end of dive and cannot do the safety stop without having to swim down. I pass them a 2kg weight. I always dive with my dive torch as in low vis on day dives ( or in dark caverns or caves ) it comes in handy for signaling as well as its primary use as a torch. Then again I also have my camera big blue lights as well.

Thanks for sharing your adventure Dody. If you struggle to go down from the surface then you are clearly under weighted. Yourself being a DM now should know better than to dive underweighted.
If you are underweighted at the beginning of the dive then that is not a good thing.

Take more weights and use your BCD for it's primary purpose. One thing about my DC the Perdix is that I can see it without needing a dive torch in low visibility. Maybe you should get one, or a Peregrine. We have all made mistakes with our diving. We survive and learn from them as you will from this dive.
 
Your a relatively new diver maybe consider taking another course to broaden your situational awareness or ask a mature instructor to give you a 'tune up'

He is now a DM. DM's should know when to abort a dive before anything nasty happens. One of the things I believe is that people go through and do courses and still do not have the experience required. Courses are sold off on the fastest possible basis with no real experience required.
 
I was 10 meters away from my wife. Too far to stop her. I would not have entered the cave if it was not for this stupid macho thing of wanting to protect the wife. But I would have done the same things for my kids.
The best way to protect your wife, in this instance, would have been to stop her from entering the cave. I know you were 10 metres away, but could you not have used something metallic to bang on your tank and draw her attention? Do you dive with a small dive knife?
 
The best way to protect your wife, in this instance, would have been to stop her from entering the cave. I know you were 10 metres away, but could you not have used something metallic to bang on your tank and draw her attention? Do you dive with a small dive knife?

His wife should also know when not to continue a dive herself. After all she is well qualified. She should not be relying on her husband for all her diving decisions.
 
His wife should also know when not to continue a dive herself. After all she is well qualified. She should not be relying on her husband for all her diving decisions
Of course. I was simly saying what would have been the best way of stopping her from entering the cave (which was a big no-no) from a 10m distance.
The O.P. stated that he was against her entering, but pointed out that he was 10m away, so it would appear that it didn't occur to him how to get her attention.
 
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