The second dive I explicitly told my instructor that I had to go real slow, so I just followed the line behind them and took my time to get to the bottom, and it was way easier.
Sounds like you're a fast learner, even if the first lesson was rather painful.
Some people will always have problems being able to equalize rapidly. Slow down, take your time, and go at a pace that works for you. Make sure your buddy is aware of the issue pre-dive to avoid seperation.
The last thing you want to do is force yourself and wind up hurt.