Bear in mind that many brand new divers immediately go out and buy full gear packages only to find that they replace much of the gear as they get more experience in diving and realize that they bought stuff they don't really want to dive with for the long haul. Also, as lots of people get excited about diving at first, buying the whole gear set up is part of the newness and excitement, then they don't actually end up diving much. These two things are part of why there is so much used dive gear available.
So, probably the most useful advice I could offer at this point would be for you to go slowly and really investigate different options for each part of the gear puzzle. There's a huge amount of hype in dive gear purchasing. Just a few short decades ago divers did lots of very demanding dives with gear that's considered very modest by today's "standards."
I'd start by first deciding where you're going to dive in the conceivable future, and buy exposure suits for that environment. If that's the caribbean, get 3 mil suits for each of you; fit is everything in a wetsuit, so visit some dive shops and make sure they fit you perfectly. The snazziest hi-tech titanium super stretch high end wetsuit in the world will make you miserable if it doesn't fit, while a regular no frills neoprene suit with no bells and whistles that fits great will make your diving experience much nicer.
Buying a reg is easy; any decent entry level reg by a major manufacturer like aqualung, scubapro, oceanic, zeagle, and mares will work just fine....don;t let anyone talk you into a high performance reg with the B.S. "it's your life, so spend more." The safest regs around are the simple downstream workhorses like the SP MK2, aqualung titan, zeagle envoy. One thing you want to consider is parts and service availability in the locations you will be diving.
BC purchase is much more involved as there are various styles which do act differently in the water and the only way to know what's best for you is to dive with them. I'd rent for a while, and don't spend alot of money until you have tried several.
You could buy almost any wrist computer and be fine with it...there are big differences in the way different computers calculate nitrogen loading and off gassing, with the most conservative of those touting extra safety. But, there are absolutely no statistics that support this claim. It's certainly not a bad thing to dive with a very conservative computer, but best and most important is to dive conservatively regardless of your computer's calculations, especially watching ascent rates and overall dive profiles, as well as the many contributors to DCS that computers know nothing about; hydration, physical fitness, abstaining from strenuous excercise after diving, etc. You're going to find out that on single tank rec dives (especially with the typical AL80) you'll almost never get into deco situations provided you're sensible about depth, profile shape, and surface intervals. Consequently, I end up paying attention to hard dive data like depth and dive time, and of course ascent rate, that the computer provides rather than NDL, which is any computer's "best guess." Since ALL the computers give you that data, it doesn't make too much difference what you dive with in those scenarios. Once you get into double tanks or much larger tanks with longer and deeper dives, it's a completely different story; those situations are best done with much more training and computers (or software) designed for those specific dives.