insta buddy nightmares

[Jim Lapenta]

One thing I make sure of is that if I don;t like who I am diving with I can dive alone. You do not have to risk your safety or enjoyment on a buddy who is less than competent. If asked to buddy up with a new diver I usually will. If told I have to then they need to sign a release I keep in my logbook, and the op is going to comp me the trip of I'm not going and they will refund my money. As Andy said make sure this clear up front. If you don't plan the boat trip itself I hope you plan the dive and do not depend on a DM to do it.

 

[k ellis]

I thought you were starting a post about buddies that you were assigned but it appears as though your post is stories about others that you observed. Were any of these people assigned to you as a buddy or are were they just on the same boat as you? Just asking because I like to hear stories that we can learn from.

Well in all honesty they were not assigned to me no but being the senior non professional diver on the boat I spent quiet a lot of time fishing out the divers mentioned above and having to first off calm them down after reaching them and then having to deal with their buddies who were very much new divers as well so they were kind of freaked also.

They were on the same boat with me and I was blessed with a more experienced diver for a dive buddy who was able to be a great assistance in these situations.

 

[W8less]

Here's a sleazy little "ice breaking" trick that I have had pretty good success with that eliminates getting paired up with an unknown quantity on a trip. While in the booking process, I let the owner know that I will be writing a destination travel article for a local dive rag. When I get to the shop I interview the owner/skipper/crew and ask questions about the shop/dive boat. Take a few land promo pictures. By now you have developed a good rapport with the crew/pros and they have a vested interest in seeing that you have a positive experience. In most cases I've been given greater elbow room and have had DM's go out of their way to show me the "good stuff".

 

[DevonDiver]

btw.... Do customers count as insta-buddies? I have a list as long as my arm, but that's what I get paid for!

 

[Crush]

btw.... Do customers count as insta-buddies? I have a list as long as my arm, but that's what I get paid for!

Yes, they count, but because of bandwidth issues you can only give us a "top ten."

 

[aquaregia]

Instabuddy flops around, loses weight belt, handswims excessively (a problem because instabuddy's enormous arms were almost as long as vis). Doesn't watch air or respond when asked, I call the dive twice because instabuddy gives an OK and keeps swimming the first time. When we reach the surface instabuddy panics and I have to talk instabuddy down and tow instabuddy into Monastery.

Another instabuddy had a previous dive, I did not. Instabuddy blows planned depth (barely) and does not adjust maximum exposure time. I was fine on both my computers and my tables, but I did not know instabuddy's residuals. Due to highly profiled dives, no symptoms occurred, but tables indicated 7 minutes of omitted deco.

However:

Instabuddy is a perfect gas match, and has similar risk tolerances. We do two dives and surface with >1000psi (AL80) for each dive. Lovely dives.

Instabuddy is experienced and extremely light on air. Kept off coral, didn't bother marine life, kept close but didn't hit me in the face.

Instabuddy and I meet in a parking lot and we do his 8th lifetime dive. Keeps close, controls buoyancy and trim well, uses less than half the air I do.


I'm always worried that I'm the bad buddy. A lot of my buddies seem really excited underwater, and I feel that I just sorta float around and don't really pass that sort of energy along. Also, sometimes they look like they're pissed at me the whole time, but I think the hood has a lot to do with it. They usually laugh and joke at the surface afterwards, and call me back for more diving.

I'm also self conscious about my hoovering abilities. If there were points for being able to drain a tank quickly, I think I'd be able to get them.

 

[The Chairman]

If you have never had a bad experience with a instant buddy than you are the bad buddy.

I kinda disagree with this sentiment.

Quite often, you are your own worst dive buddy! In fact, I would suggest that if you have multiple bad experiences with your buddy(ies), than you might very well be in a category I call a "High Maintenance Buddy". Now high maintenance buddies are a peculiar breed. They see every one else's faults but not their own. Every separation is the other buddy's fault. They are critical of any and all imperfections in others, and while they will rarely discuss what they see with their buddy, they have no problems telling the rest of the world about the trauma they have been subjected to. Shudder the thought, that they actually tried to help them overcome the difficulty!

If you want to have a good buddy, you must BE one. Don't expect your insta-buddy to read your mind and dive the way you do. Before the dive, you should:

• Express your expectations (proximity, focus of the dive, level of interaction, etc.)
• Discuss and agree on limits (time, depth and air).
• Agree on signals you might use.
• Assign a leader. Swap for the next dive.
• Agree on appropriate actions. (Do you need to go up together, what to do with separations, etc)
• Assist your buddy whenever possible.
• Use Situational Awareness to be able to correct issues before they become problems.

It takes TWO divers to form a buddy pair. Be sure that you are doing your part before you start assigning blame. Just think how badly your insta-buddy might be talking about you!!!

 

[Buoyant1]

Last year, I was in the Keys and wanted to knock a few wrecks off of the list (as usual) since when we normally go, the weather is questionable, and I usually can only get half of the dives I really want. For once, the weather cooperated, and I was able to get on a few of the planned trips. One such trip was on the Adolphus Busch off of Big Pine. I hooked up with an operator the year prior, and they screwed up the reservation, so I found one that did the wreck (and two reefs) every Wednesday!

So as we were departing, the DM asked if anyone needed a buddy, two of us raised out hands, I was diving alone, and the other gentleman that raised his hand was diving the wreck alone, but doing the two reefs with his wife, who wasn't interested in the deeper dive. So they put us together. He was an older gentleman of Italian origin, and spoke very broken English, but wasn't too hard to understand. Between his wife and me, we got the dive plan decided. He had a VERY nice camera set up, and wanted to get pictures of the wreck, so he deferred to me as far as navigating the wreck. Not a problem! My thoughts were that if this guy has a rig THAT expensive, he MUST know what he's doing, and possibly, I'll end up as a model in some obscure Italian dive magazine!

When it was time to splash, we were the last two ready (he took his time) I jumped in and went to the mooring ball, there was a slight surface current, so we were advised to hang on to the line that lead to the ball. He jumped in, and looked up to the boat to get his camera. They handed it to him, and he immediately started fiddling with the camera, The DM yelled down and said "HOLD ON TO THE LINE" and his wife yelled the same thing in Italian. He nodded, and started messing with his camera again, and started floating around the side of the boat away from me! The DM yelled to the mate to toss him a line, then looked at me and said "are there still bubbles on the downline?!" I looked and said yes, he said "go follow someone!" So I did! But as I got about 20 feet down, another person that held up the trip was with her (I guess) husband HANGING ON to the rope for dear life, with the fear of GOD in her eyes! (the source of the bubbles) I looked past, and saw a trio just getting off the line on the wreck, so I went past them, and followed the trio... the rest of the dive was fine, and I hooked up with another couple that I was chatting with before boarding for the two reef dives.

Oh well! At least I got to see the wreck!

 

[MXGratefulDiver]

It takes TWO divers to form a buddy pair.

Well, it takes two divers and a mutual commitment to diving as a team. Being a dive buddy involves more than just getting in the water with another diver. It involves ... at a minimum ... a basic understanding of how to dive with someone else, the ability and willingness to communicate with each other during the dive, a mutual buy-in of the dive plan BEFORE getting in the water, and a commitment to involve your buddy in any decisions you make during the dive that might alter the plan.

Without those things, you aren't a buddy pair at all ... you're just two divers who happen to be in roughly the same place at roughly the same time.

Be sure that you are doing your part before you start assigning blame. Just think how badly your insta-buddy might be talking about you!!!

As I've said in a previous iteration of this topic ... if you aren't having a good dive, perhaps it's not your buddy's fault ...

... Bob (Grateful Diver)

 

[diver 85]

OP, no wonder I've never had a bad experience, you've made up for me.....