Instructor dating DM, would I tell students?

[sphyrnidus]

Ah when I was young.. my father in law was the instructor and I was working as his DM. We did classes together for 10 years. It was always obvious what our relationship was, but it never was an issue.


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[gcarter]

I understood the OP's question to be about an unsolicited disclosure, and I can't really think of any circumstances under which that would be relevant/appropriate. In response to a direct question, I suppose it would depend on whether it's any of the student's business. Lying about it certainly doesn't seem appropriate.

The direct question is the appropriate circumstance to me. Unsolicited not so much.

Badly worded poll IMO.

 

[TSandM]

I DM for my husband. He introduces me as his wife. It isn't weird. But it really isn't relevant, except to explain to the students why I interrupt and correct him all the time

 

[DevonDiver]

... it really isn't relevant, except to explain to the students why I interrupt and correct him all the time

For some, it might explain certain 'intimate' chemistry; actions or remarks. Without that explanation, students could easily start to make negative assumptions about the character of those involved.

i.e. "Isn't he awfully 'grab-ass' with his poor assistant!!!... the poor girl should make a formal complaint for harassment"

 

[AfterDark]

No, your personal life is none of their business. Why would anyone care? I guess if one of the students were coming on too her.......or someone in the class that's attractive to you..... Just kidding

---------- Post added October 18th, 2013 at 05:18 AM ----------

I DM for my husband. He introduces me as his wife. It isn't weird. But it really isn't relevant, except to explain to the students why I interrupt and correct him all the time

That would be the giveaway anyway. Did I just violate the TOS!!!!!!

 

[RJP]

I read the "if appropriate" as "if it sort of naturally works it's way into the conversation." I generally become friendly with all the students I work with, and the conversation often works it's way around to "so, does your wife dive?" The real answer is "no way, no how" but if my wife (or girlfriend, as the case may be) were my assistant I would answer with "yes she does dive, as a matter of fact... she's sitting right there."

Don't see the issue with revealing it "if appropriate" but wold feel like I was hiding it if it would have been appropriate to reveal the relationship and I didn't do so.

 

[MXGratefulDiver]

My initial instructor was dating his DM. Neither one of them ever mentioned it, but it didn't take long to figure out. Wasn't weird in the least ... they made a good team, and were very effective.

Nowadays they're married with three kids ...

... Bob (Grateful Diver)

 

[Rhone Man]

The only time I think you need to tell them is if you break up or have a really bad fight before a training session. That way they know not to over-react when one of you draws your knife.

 

[koozemani]

The direct question is the appropriate circumstance to me. Unsolicited not so much.

Badly worded poll IMO.

I agree.

 

[supergaijin]

Why would you think they even care?

Narcissistic much?