How to piss off a Divemaster?

[Tigerman]

a CLASS?? You think guided dives is a CLASS? I can see why people wont listen to you

 

[SeaHawk12]

Sorry, actually did mean while working as a certified assistant for courses. On one of the OW courses I recently DMed we had a diver who, when they got to the bottom of the lake on their first checkout dive, literally just sat there staring at his buddy. The buddy, in turn, starred back at him. They were either having one heck of a heart to heart, or had just become a bit overwhelmed by the new underwater world, or even possibly had just started to zone out. Either way, since they weren't particularly paying attention to me or the instructor, who had already begun to swim out into the murk, and when signaled to follow him, just gave me an ok....and then sat there. Being the fact that they were both friends of mine, I decided to remedy the situation my physically I picking the first diver up, and turning him to point at the instructor. As he watched his fins move out of our range of vis, he, unsurprisingly, decided now was a good time to go.

 

[flots am]

I'm am an easy going guy, and unless what you are doing will directly result in death or injury to you or another diver, it's rather difficult to piss me off. However, there are certain things which will internally annoy me, but not necessarily make me treat you like a problem child.

. . .

Apparently everybody who thinks they're better than you, or doesn't appreciate you bothering them, annoys you.

-100 dive divers. These folks annoy me to know end because they've usually done enough dives to be decent divers, but suddenly seem to decided they have mastered all there is to learn. They always know everything about anything in diving, and are dead sure what they learned at location A applies completely and utterly to location B. After all, how can my diving be anything but perfect after 100 dives?

Air is on the top and the water is on the bottom. Don't forget to breathe and don't come up too fast. Everything else is optional.

If everything else isn't optional, it's not an Open Water dive.

 

[James R]

I agree with the others, I never say anything about instructor, divemaster, or anything else like that on a trip. I don't carry those cards, either. One card gets me all I need on a trip, so that's all I bring.

 

[SeaHawk12]

Sorry, my wording was less than ideal, and conveys a condescending attitude which isn't intended. That what I get for writing this at 3:00am

In general, so long as you dive safely and don't endanger yourself and other, you're a pleasure to have on board! I realize there are many, many, MANY divers who are better than me, and I appreciate these peoples ability and give them all the leeway they need and attempt to learn from them.

(BTW, the scientific diver thing is actually more of a gripe with one particular scientific diver, not really scientific divers in general. Just threw that on there because it was late and I was being irked by the memory of them...)

 

[jadairiii]

Getting puked on or having the divers puke on your gear bag. If you are going to puke, do it over the side and down wind!

 

[djtimmy77]

I really don't see what the big crisis is if a DM on a boat checks the tank right before I jump off. It's their job and it's automatic. I see them doing it to every diver before me so it's not a surprise. I'm sure they know which way to turn the knob.
A DM that doesn't know which way to turn a valve? Oh, come on!
Absolutely rediculous.

Not all valves are standard. One of my dive buddies had their air turned OFF by the DM right as she was getting in the water. The valve was a non-standard valve from a set of doubles taken apart. Quick thinking by another buddy who noticed this resolved the situation but could have been bad.

 

[Aguablanco1]

Not all valves are standard. One of my dive buddies had their air turned OFF by the DM right as she was getting in the water. The valve was a non-standard valve from a set of doubles taken apart. Quick thinking by another buddy who noticed this resolved the situation but could have been bad.

If I were wearing non-standard equipment, and I saw that the DM was checking valves, I like to think I would tell the DM what I had and how to check it. At the least I would have my buddy near by so they could explain and possibly double check. Not pointing fingers, just saying.
RichH

 

[djtimmy77]

Point away, I wasn't there on that dive. I have heard the story many times though. Just an illustration to the DM's about making assumptions!

Fortunately the tanks I usually use on boats have H-Valves and the DM's almost never touch them. haha

 

[Dr. Lecter]

If I were wearing non-standard equipment, and I saw that the DM was checking valves, I like to think I would tell the DM what I had and how to check it. At the least I would have my buddy near by so they could explain and possibly double check. Not pointing fingers, just saying.
RichH

Outhinking the help is not a paying customer's job.