Both of you dropped the ball on this. Just regurgitating others' comments, but let's recap:
1) no thorough communication pre-dive. "she put her bc and everything on sitting down, then couldnt stand up.. well, we got her to the water," first clue: if she is having trouble getting in, she very well could have trouble getting out, when she is more tired, etc. Should have discussed on the surface swim out at the very least.
2) on exit, didn't bother to turn back and look? I could never just walk back without at least keeping an eye on the buddy. Even if you were a little away, you could have shirked off your gear, tossed your fins to the side and headed back in to at least assist a crawl.
3) but she isn't innocent: go back to (1). She should have communicated that the gear was heavy for her, and that she would "appreciate a little help if needed." At least a closer proximity would have helped here.
4) and then she lashed out, blaming you for the fin loss. She ultimately could have crawled out, and to blame someone for losing your gear is almost always just a sign of stress/lashing out. Unless of course you were holding on to it and let go...
I hope you learned something from this though. Not every diver will perform as you would expect. If you choose to dive with a new buddy (or a rent-a-buddy), you need to communicate with them prior and go over things... expectations, needs, etc. The dive is never all about you. It is always about you and your buddy.
Hopefully a lesson learned and good luck with the wedding!!
1) no thorough communication pre-dive. "she put her bc and everything on sitting down, then couldnt stand up.. well, we got her to the water," first clue: if she is having trouble getting in, she very well could have trouble getting out, when she is more tired, etc. Should have discussed on the surface swim out at the very least.
2) on exit, didn't bother to turn back and look? I could never just walk back without at least keeping an eye on the buddy. Even if you were a little away, you could have shirked off your gear, tossed your fins to the side and headed back in to at least assist a crawl.
3) but she isn't innocent: go back to (1). She should have communicated that the gear was heavy for her, and that she would "appreciate a little help if needed." At least a closer proximity would have helped here.
4) and then she lashed out, blaming you for the fin loss. She ultimately could have crawled out, and to blame someone for losing your gear is almost always just a sign of stress/lashing out. Unless of course you were holding on to it and let go...
I hope you learned something from this though. Not every diver will perform as you would expect. If you choose to dive with a new buddy (or a rent-a-buddy), you need to communicate with them prior and go over things... expectations, needs, etc. The dive is never all about you. It is always about you and your buddy.
Hopefully a lesson learned and good luck with the wedding!!