i'm losing my other baby girl (dog) right now

[divemistress]

this is my cry for help, for connection.

i've run upstairs to type this note, but i've got to get back down. my girl, thirteen-year-old astro, is there in the sun room sleeping. dying.

advanced liver failure, and possibly an inoperable stomach tumor. my best friends told me the news tonight, when i got home. to virginia from l.a., where i was visiting my father who is dying of cancer.

my friends had replaced my dead flowers with fresh ones, dimmed the lights to hide the vomit and diarrhea stains on the carpet, and lit candles to mask the odor. they handed me a glass of white wine and told me the news. which was a surprise only in the specifics.

i knew astro was dying, i just didn't know when or why. for weeks now, she'd barely eaten, barely moved, only slept, face to the wall. i thought she was pining after her sister, 14-year-old kona, who died in december, on my birthday.

http://www.scubaboard.com/showthread.php?s=&threadid=19506&highlight=the+wonder+dog

kona couldn't wait for me to return from l.a., but astro managed. my love, my sweet white baby, who looks more like a bunny than the white german shepherd she is. she with her huge white and pink ears, white whiskers and pink nose.

but this isn't the time to write her obituary. this is the time to snuggle with her, to kiss her, to tempt her with bits of beef and cheese. this is the time to care for her the way i couldn't care for kona during her last night. i want to spoil astro any and every way i can before we go to the vet tomorrow.

i'm sorry to unload here again. i feel like a user, so needy. but scuba just doesn't seem important right now. though i know it will someday.

astro needs me now. and i need support, cyberfriends. i'll try to visit again tonight. but now i've got to go.

judy

 

[The Chairman]

our thoughts and prayers are with you. Have a special night with Astro... parting is never easy when you love so deeply.

 

[wreckchick]

Judy,

Losing a pet is harder than non-pet people understand. I feel your pain and wish every day that my dog lives a long a happy life like yours surely have.

My thoughts are with you and Astro.

Rachel

 

[Kayla]

and prayers are with you, its a terrible time to go through, but it will all get better. Were always here for you.


Kayla

 

[chiara]

Judy,

I never met you, and never might, but tears are streaming down my eyes, I'm just glad I have an office to myself.

Do her a favour, a last one, in thankful love for what she gave you all these years: let her go peacefully before it becomes too painful to her and to you.

I know this might sound too harsh, perhaps one day, in due time, you will understand, I sincerely hope you will.

In the last few years, and barely twelve months apart, we had to put an end to the sufferings of Tom and Zanclo, our beloved big boys, a Riesenschnauzer and a German sheperd.

I went out to work knowing I wouldn't find them when I came back, it was very hard but I knew they would be happier and that one day I would see them again, yes, I firmly believe that the loved ones we met during our lives and who departed before us will be there waiting for us when our time comes, be them furry, scaled (I have tortoises) or human.

I know what it means to wait the end beside a sick, old, beloved animal: my very first dog, Tilla, who lived with us for almost fifteen years, was very sick when one night I went out to my local gym.

When I came back two hours later she was even worse, she saw me, she even tried to get up a last time to greet me, never managed to; we sat on the cold kitchen floor beside her basket for a very long time, she was in a coma and her heart might have stopped at some time while we were there, it was a very sad vigil, but I'm glad I waited till the end.

If you have the chance to, bury her somewhere you'll be able to visit, or just even know where she is.

Tilla has been dead for sixteen years, I was there saying a prayer at Easter time a few weeks ago, and in no way am I ashamed of that, never will.

Feel free to PM me if you need a shoulder to cry on.

 

[ScubaBaby]

Judy

I know how horrid it is to loose a pet - my lost mine that I'd had since birth and I was away on holiday and my parents put her down.

I'm glad you get to say goodbye - thats one small comfort. I am soo sorry for what your going through. Prayers are with you and Astro.

 

[chiara]

Another thought just crossed my mind: a good therapy will be to go to one of the shelters and find someone to love again.

Take your time, but not too much: the new dog, be it a puppy or even better an unlucky young adult dog (or cat) will never replace Astro or Kona, but they will need your love and will repay it in the most extraordinary of ways, especially if they went through the trauma of being abandoned.

Tilla and Tom came from a shelter, Zanclo was simply given away when his former "parents" didn't want him anymore, and he was a purebreed with pedigree and all.

Our current dog, Tobia, was unlucky right from the beginning: his brother got all the attention and was closely resembling an elephant before he was two months old, Tobia remained small (and black) and has been suffering various health problems and special food requirements ever since.

 

[canuckdiver]

Judy, I know how hard it is to lose a pet.

A lot of people look at me funny when I say that my pets are as important to me as their children are to them.
Your'e saying goodbye to a loved companion, and that hurts.
My thoughts are with you, anything I can do, please feel free to ask.

:cuddle:

 

[Diversauras]

My shepard, Malibu, was killed 7 years ago and the thought often still brings a tear. In some ways the feeling is stronger than for my dad who died 5 years ago. I don't know why and I am not sure I even care why, it just is so.

My thoughts are with you...

 

[Rick Murchison]

As much as it hurts to lose a beloved pet, I try to "keep score" on the positive side, to think about what the animal has brought to me, has added to my life's quality and quantity - to rejoice at having them as a part of my life for awhile. It still hurts to let one go, but it does help me a little.
As for getting another pet soon, you do know that all the time you're playing with a puppy or kitten your "age" clock runs backward, right?
I will keep you in my prayers, Judy; hugs from afar.
Rick