Laughing Under Water....
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erparamedic
Vampire Girl......er Dork
Here's a silly little joke that I heard from a doc at work yesterday. (Beware... it's cheezy!)
What did the fish say when it hit a wall?
DAM!!!
(Hahaha! I told you it was cheezy!)
What did the fish say when it hit a wall?
DAM!!!
(Hahaha! I told you it was cheezy!)
OP
DiveMom1927
Contributor
these are all good.... keep them coming... with all these divers this thread should be pouring...
norine62
Registered
Three groups - one SSI, one PADI, and one NAUI- are out on a rig dive when their boat sinks. They all surface amid the debris, and huddle together within their groups.
The SSI leader looks to his group and states: "Well, we're going to swim to shore. It'll be good for us." They take off, and soon dissapear over the horizon.
The NAUI leader looks at his group and says: "OK, everyone take off their BC and inflate them. We'll tie them together and raft our way to shore." THey do this and float off on their way.
After a long pause, the PADI leader looks at his group. He looks left, looks right, then looks down in the water - then he says: "OK, its going to cost y'all a little extra, but I am now offering a wreck survey course."
(Please don't flame - its just how I heard it
)
The SSI leader looks to his group and states: "Well, we're going to swim to shore. It'll be good for us." They take off, and soon dissapear over the horizon.
The NAUI leader looks at his group and says: "OK, everyone take off their BC and inflate them. We'll tie them together and raft our way to shore." THey do this and float off on their way.
After a long pause, the PADI leader looks at his group. He looks left, looks right, then looks down in the water - then he says: "OK, its going to cost y'all a little extra, but I am now offering a wreck survey course."
(Please don't flame - its just how I heard it
)
Mthelming
Contributor
A diver begins his descent into the water. When he hits15 feet he encounters another man without any gear. Wow, thats amazing he thinks as he continues down to 25 feet and again the man joins him. Determined not to have his $2000.00 gear setup undermind he goes down to 35 feet and again the man catches up to him. Frustrated, the diver takes out his slate and writes "thats amazing, how do you do that?" Th e man takes the slate and writes back "I'm drowning you idiot!"
OP
DiveMom1927
Contributor
A man is stranded on a desert island, all alone for ten years. One day, he sees a speck in the horizon. He thinks to himself, "It's not a ship." The speck gets a little closer and he thinks, "It's not a boat." The speck gets even closer and he thinks, "It's not a raft." Then, out of the surf comes this gorgeous blonde woman, wearing a wet suit and scuba gear.She comes up to the man and she says, "How long has it been since you've had a cigarette?""Ten years!" he says.She reaches over, unzips this waterproof pocket on her left sleeve and pulls out a pack of fresh cigarettes. He takes one, lights it, takes a long drag and says, "Man, oh man! Is that good!"Then she asked, "How long has it been since you had a drink of whiskey?He replies, "Ten years!"She reaches over, unzips the waterproof pocket on her right sleeve, pulls out a flask and gives it to him. He takes a long swig and says, "Wow, that's fantastic!"Then she starts unzipping the long zipper that runs down the front of her wet suit and she says to him, "And how long has it been since you had some REAL fun?"And the man cries out, "My God! Don't tell me you've got a set of golf clubs in there, too!"
OP
DiveMom1927
Contributor
and here is the best one ive seen so far...
There was a bar by a lake used by scuba divers was and a man walked in carrying a cardboard box. He put the box on the bar and ordered a drink. It was quiet, and the bartender was a talkative fellow. He naturally asked what was in the box. The man didn't answer, but opened the box and took out a miniature grand piano, then a miniature piano stool, and finally, a little man less than a foot tall, who sat at the piano and started to play the most incredible music you had ever heard.
"He's fantastic!" said the barman, "Where did you get him?"
"Well," said the customer, "I had been diving in the lake when I saw this frog swimming in the middle of lake, at about 15 feet, and looking very tired. I took hold of the frog and carried him to the surface. The frog seemed very relieved, so I carried him to the shore.
"When I put him down the frog started to talk! He said he wasn't really a frog, but was a handsome prince turned into a frog by a wicked fairy. And because he had never learned to swim, he wasn't making a very good job of being a frog. And as I had just saved his life, he was going to grant me a wish.
"Now, the frog did seem to have difficulty equalizing as we surfaced, and it must have affected his hearing, because I told him my wish – and that was how I got a 10" pianist!"
There was a bar by a lake used by scuba divers was and a man walked in carrying a cardboard box. He put the box on the bar and ordered a drink. It was quiet, and the bartender was a talkative fellow. He naturally asked what was in the box. The man didn't answer, but opened the box and took out a miniature grand piano, then a miniature piano stool, and finally, a little man less than a foot tall, who sat at the piano and started to play the most incredible music you had ever heard.
"He's fantastic!" said the barman, "Where did you get him?"
"Well," said the customer, "I had been diving in the lake when I saw this frog swimming in the middle of lake, at about 15 feet, and looking very tired. I took hold of the frog and carried him to the surface. The frog seemed very relieved, so I carried him to the shore.
"When I put him down the frog started to talk! He said he wasn't really a frog, but was a handsome prince turned into a frog by a wicked fairy. And because he had never learned to swim, he wasn't making a very good job of being a frog. And as I had just saved his life, he was going to grant me a wish.
"Now, the frog did seem to have difficulty equalizing as we surfaced, and it must have affected his hearing, because I told him my wish – and that was how I got a 10" pianist!"
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