So to get back on topic... and hopefully to the core of this issue... in my and
@Zef 's posts which were removed from this discussion we brought up people/threads in which the OPs got argumentative with other users and mashed on the report button, prompting moderator intervention leading to lots of deleted posts. Zef without naming names, and in my case without even mentioning a specific thread.
I suppose invoking these OPs was enough to count as "being mean to other members". This doesn't seem overly mean to me.
So my question is where's the line? What's the bar? Is it really that low? How should we handle posting criticism when it's warranted? Criticism is a necessary part of learning, betterment, analysis, and open democratic discourse. I understand and accept not being allowed to call someone an a-hole here (even though I think we should be able to) but not being allowed to say anything negative at all seems a bit tough to navigate.
As for threads going off-topic, yeah, I get that. But threads going off-topic can be fun, funny, or fascinating. At that point it seems better to lock the thread, warn, or temporarily ban users rather than delete posts. At least preserve what was said. Deleting messages from the record is the kind of drastic measure that (in my opinion) should be reserved for illegal stuff or spam.