Wife will not let me dive without a dive master..

[Scubagolf]

Double your life insurance and hire a pool boy....

 

[diver 85]

Man, you're your own person. I realize that there will be fallout afterwards, but sometimes you just gotta do what makes you happy. I think she'll probably get over it in time and a few months down the road it won't be a big deal at all.

& if worse comes to worst------get a new wife????..............

 

[scagrotto]

marriage is a partnership, not a dictatorship where one spouse holds absolute veto power and the other begs for permission.

That's absolutely true, but it's apparent that a lot of posters don't realize that it cuts both ways.

 

[ccx2]

I can't give you any advice on this one.
Im lucky i quess, my wife encourages me to go and usually while I'm gone she gets some guy down the street to help out around the house with weekend chores that i should be doing instead of diving/fishing, she is so sweet.

 

[Diver0001]

At this point I just want to get wet.

A friend of mine recently said this to me.

In his case he has a wife and 3 children. Both he and his wife are professors at a prestigious university.

But at home.... SHE has the pants on.

She's.... er ... a little controlling. To the point, for example, that putting "dirty" dishes into the dishwasher is an issue. She insists that dishes are basically washed first and THEN put into the dishwasher.

He doesn't agree. Neither would I. But whether or not dirty dishes get put into the dishwasher or not can lead to discussions about divorce.

For me it's easy to have an opinion from the side-lines. He wants to get wet and she utterly refuses to give him the room to dive..... In her case it's not about safety, but about him not being there when she snaps her fingers. For the life of me I can't understand why he puts up with her. He's not stupid.... I mean he has a PhD in physics engineering--which is one of the most difficult things in the human condition to understand, let alone teach-- and he works at a university .... but I think he should divorce her. When they met I told him to run and not look back... and yet he ignored me, he married her, he stays, and he procreated with her. I think if I had married her that either she or I would have committed murder by now. I'm so glad that she's a friend and when she goes all OCD that I can leave and come back another day. I love her like a sister but I wouldn't marry my sister and I wouldn't marry her either.

But I digress.

Something similar is happening on this thread. Everyone had an opinion about how the OP should deal with his wife. Several people have said, "grow a pair" or "lay down the law" or something to that effect.... but not everyone is in a relationship where doing so is wise, let alone possible. Politics is not just for politicians. It's a theme in relationships as well. And I would go a step further. Those who cannot apply diplomacy in a relationship probably can't hold one. Someone dared me to predict who had been divorced and not. Obviously I can't do that with any accuracy. But I will say that a number of people posting on this thread, if they are not divorced, are married to very passive women (or women who have been bullied into being passive).

As for the OP, don't judge him. He's obviously married to a woman with a strong personality. If he could show more balls or not is an interesting debate but it's not the main point here. The main point is how he can deal with the situation he's in.

R..

 

[Mscdex]

OP,
There are a few clubs in the area.
Atlantis Rangers Visitors Menu Page
They currently meet in Calverton. I am part of this club, but don't get to a lot of meetings due to distance. Most of us keep in contact through email and dive locally.

I will probably be diving again in the next few weeks. I plan to go to Lake Millbrook in Haymarket, and Lake Rawlings down here in VA. A few members also go to Hydes Quarry fairly regularly. Feel free to contact me if you would like to join us diving sometime.

Ocean Rovers Scuba Club in Frederick
Ocean Rovers Scuba Club

Northern Virginia Dive Club
Virginia Dive Club NOVA ? Virginia Scuba - Northern Virginia's and Metro DC most sought after Recreational and Technical Dive Shop

The Dive Shop in Fairfax hosts Fun Dives at the quarry where they pair you up with another diver. You might be able to arrange a divemaster through the shop for little or no charge for one of these days.
The Dive Shop - Northern Virginia

I hope that helps.

Thanks. I might take you up on that. At the end of the day I showed her the danger statistics compared to other activities and just said that I'm going on my dives. My slight compromise is to bring a friend who has been an active diver for the past 5 years. She is going to be in her quiet mood for a few days but that really isn't the worst thing.

 

[Diver0001]

I forgot to add it to my previous post.... but I have recently received the book "a short introduction into the female psyche". (see photo)

 

[miked]

I forgot to add it to my previous post.... but I have recently received the book "a short introduction into the female psyche". (see photo)

View attachment 185007

IIRC, That is a picture of the table of contents. (sorry ladies, I had to say it!!)

 

[oldschoolto]

A friend of mine recently said this to me.

In his case he has a wife and 3 children. Both he and his wife are professors at a prestigious university.

But at home.... SHE has the pants on.

She's.... er ... a little controlling. To the point, for example, that putting "dirty" dishes into the dishwasher is an issue. She insists that dishes are basically washed first and THEN put into the dishwasher.

He doesn't agree. Neither would I. But whether or not dirty dishes get put into the dishwasher or not can lead to discussions about divorce.

For me it's easy to have an opinion from the side-lines. He wants to get wet and she utterly refuses to give him the room to dive..... In her case it's not about safety, but about him not being there when she snaps her fingers. For the life of me I can't understand why he puts up with her. He's not stupid.... I mean he has a PhD in physics engineering--which is one of the most difficult things in the human condition to understand, let alone teach-- and he works at a university .... but I think he should divorce her. When they met I told him to run and not look back... and yet he ignored me, he married her, he stays, and he procreated with her. I think if I had married her that either she or I would have committed murder by now. I'm so glad that she's a friend and when she goes all OCD that I can leave and come back another day. I love her like a sister but I wouldn't marry my sister and I wouldn't marry her either.

But I digress.

Something similar is happening on this thread. Everyone had an opinion about how the OP should deal with his wife. Several people have said, "grow a pair" or "lay down the law" or something to that effect.... but not everyone is in a relationship where doing so is wise, let alone possible. Politics is not just for politicians. It's a theme in relationships as well. And I would go a step further. Those who cannot apply diplomacy in a relationship probably can't hold one. Someone dared me to predict who had been divorced and not. Obviously I can't do that with any accuracy. But I will say that a number of people posting on this thread, if they are not divorced, are married to very passive women (or women who have been bullied into being passive).

As for the OP, don't judge him. He's obviously married to a woman with a strong personality. If he could show more balls or not is an interesting debate but it's not the main point here. The main point is how he can deal with the situation he's in.

R..

AGAIN... Why do you and others think that " ONE " must or is the Domineering and the other passive ? Where does it say you should not be happy in a marriage ???? Where does it say you need to fight for your right to do something ??? Where does it say you need to neglect your own wants and needs???

LOVE is about " WANTING THE BEST FOR YOUR SPOUSE " it's about wanting your spouse to be happy... it's about giving ... NOT taking...

I have friends that are like the poster.... BITCH, BITCH and BITCH about their wives.... NO sex, NO skydiving, NO guys night, NO drag racing.... NO MONEY... The wife takes the pay checks and they have to ask for money like a 10 year old... I would never live like that... LIFES TO SHORT....

Jim...

 

[lamarpaulski]

Dude..if she didnt worry about you then you would have worse problems...work it out...teach her more...go someplace with clear warm water where she can snorkel.


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