Diving with Spouse/SO – Benefits/Issues?

[Teamcasa]

In a another thread (First time with equipment problems) it’s ending with a question about diving with your spouse/significant other.

The question came up about safety and readiness to dive with people who dive exclusively with one other person, generally a s/so. So, do you depend on your s/so to do more than the regular buddy check? Are they your personal dive Sherpa, set up your gear and lead all of the dives?

If you are asked to dive with someone else, say your s/so did not want to make the third dive and you were paired up with an instant buddy, would you be a good dive partner or have you become so dependant that you have forgotten your responsibilities as a buddy?

I know for me, I always know where my buddy (my lovely bride) is, how she reacts to a given situation and what to expect from her as my buddy and she knows what to expect from me. For us, it is a perfect partnership.

 

[JahJahwarrior]

I dive almost exclusively with a good friend of mine---we are both guys, and we are both VERY straight. We both dream of the day we'll find the perfect girl to go diving wth each of us....

Do we check or set up each other's gear? Heck no! We dive together, but we don't babysit each other. We are each responsible for our gear. Infact, if anything, we'll each test the other by turning off their air or unhooking the power inflator hose or stuff like that. Keeps you on your toes.

If I was diving with a girl whom I was attracted to, I think I would find it hard to not be overly critical of her gear setup, I would nitpick about every little thing that wasn't done similarly to my setup. It'd just about kill me if she didn't dive with a long hose, for example.... I am not sure about setting up her gear, I'm really not. I'd try to move her heavy stuff for her, like tanks, but I'd probably let her set it up. It's her life support, not mine, and I don't want to be put in a position of responsibility for that. What if I forgot to turn her air on? If she got injured because of that, I'd never forgive myself. If she got injured because she forgot to turn her air on, I could live with that. (however, if it was someone I was attracted to, I'd probably make sure to do buddy checks....)

 

[Debbie O]

Precisely the reason I took the rescue diver course. Knowing my buddy/hubby was always in control and then being asked to buddy up with a stranger, I felt more education, experience was necessary. Glad I did, never had an emergency, but am much more confident in myself.

 

[cinder4320]

I dive with my husband exclusively. Yeah he now hauls the tanks (doubles are heavy!) in and out of the car but I set up my own equipment. We've dove with us as a pair and one other person (3 man teams) and had instructors during classes. Our skills are usually evenly match but when we begin something new (i.e. cavern, then cave) we don't complain if one is better than the other at first.

My husband doesn't get mad if I call a dive and vice versa.

Miranda

 

[sharkattack]

Wife and I do all our diving together as well as teach together. I wouldn't have it any other way. Only thing that sucks is when we get gear we have to buy 2 of everything. 2 sets of doubles, several sling bottles, several drysuits as well as wet suits. 18 sets of regulators, lights, masks, fins, spools, smb's, knives, back up cutting devices, hoods, wet gloves, dry gloves, glove inserts, undergarments, back plates, bladders, the list goes on and on and on.

 

[adurso]

My family dives together, all 4 of use, which requires 4 of everything of course. My wife and son, and my daughter and I generally team up as 2 buddy pairs. If one of us cannot make it, we dive as a team of 3. The wife and kids have been setting up and humping their own gear since day one, though I do check everything....I have started to carry some of my wife's gear as her knees are getting really bad, but she still does her own set up and checks.

Every now and then we have buddied with others with no problem

 

[EastEndDiver]

I dive exclusivly with my S/O and have been for 25 years.We have dove from the Deep Northeast wrecks ,which is where we both learned to dive,with drysuits doubles etc. etc. etc. to the warm tropics.We are both situationally aware and are comfortable that we can communicate with each other just using head nods or eye movements.We are both heavy into photography so at times we are almost solo diving.I consider her a better diver than me and she uses a lot less air.

 

[Rick Murchison]

Any questions...???

Rick

 

[Teamcasa]

Any questions...???

Rick

That taking team diving to perfection!
You are one lucky guy Rick.

As a father of only one daughter let me say this - wisper "elpoe" in thier ear everynight after they fall asleep!

 

[TSandM]

Almost all of my travel diving is done with my husband, although I dive quite a bit with other people at home. Peter does not set up my gear, although he helps me move it sometimes, particularly when we're talking doubles. We go through the exact same pre-dive sequence with one another that I do with anybody else. We take turns leading dives, although if Peter is carrying the camera, I usually have him lead, because it just works better that way (easier for the non-camera person to key off the guy who's stopping frequently and unpredictably, than the other way around).

The big difference for me about diving with my spouse as compared with my other buddies is that, if anything doesn't go well with my other buddies, there's no ensuing argument, and if there's any exchange about it, it doesn't carry 20 years of history with it