Question for the experienced diver

[matt_unique]

Phew..."experienced diver" is a very relative term. I can say I have experienced the same dilemma in the past trying to find like minded/acting dive buddies. I would suggest you check with insructors that you know. They would often be able to refer good divers especially if you explain what you are looking for specifically. I would also suggest you dive with groups then go chat with those you notice are good divers. Many dive shops sponsor group dives on a weekly basis. Once you meet a good buddy - stick with them. Having to worry about your buddy detracts from a dive and adds stress as you know.

You will find them.

--Matt

 

[rcain1]

I would recommend a few things sbdbrz. First is to really focus on what your past buddies have been lacking. Take a look at yourself and see if you are being to demanding. I don’t mean to simplify the issue but a dive buddy is sort of like friend (normal land friend). There is a bunch of give and take and everybody has a different way of doing things. Yes, in diving there are some set rules and ways of going about things but to people who like to dive can usually find some middle ground.

For example: My wife and I are buddies and we know each other better than any one else. In our diving I take the dominant role. Not because I have been diving 15years more than her, have more certifications and so on but because she trusts me. Some times I make stupid mistakes and she is quick to correct me. I don’t take her input in a negative manor but more as her trying to help me. I think this is where most dive buddies start butting heads and things go aria.

I have one other story/analogy.
In the military there is a defined rank structure. Someone is in charge and calls the shots. But, when you go to a rifle range they always say, “everybody is a safety officer and anybody can call a cease fire if they see an unsafe act”. The lowest ranking person can tell the highest ranking person they are doing some thing unsafe. Also, there is always an AAR(after action report) where they go over what was done and how it could be made better.

This is just my input and I hope it can help.

Good luck!

 

[diverbrian]

It has turned into somewhat an issue for me. I have two buddies who are really great to dive with and that I would trust to end of the earth, but they both live out of state (and on nearly opposite sides of the East Coast, I might add. Also, neither of them are into the deep stuff that I like to do.

The buddies that got me into diving 135 ft. routinely, etc. became instructors. Most of their local dive time is spent in pools and doing classes now. Unless I assist in their courses, that is out as well. I still have trouble finding buddies for this kind of diving as most of these types already have their own buddies for good reason. So, I just do it a lot less. My instructor buddies will be around for the Monrovia dives and a couple of Toby wrecks that I would like to extend my bottom time on with these tactics.

My normal buddies for recreational diving (local) have gotten busy with life and don't have time anymore.

But, I still still dive with good buddies and not solo. I found several when I discovered the NDI clubs here. We have even "adopted" some divers from surrounding areas.

You are on the right track. I bet that you will find buddies in your classes (with sheer number of divers coming in and out of the shop/ quarries) and local dives. Check out local dive groups and don't ignore the Scuba Board NDI group that covers the area closest to you! Most of us are pretty obssessed with diving or we wouldn't be here.

 

[LenC]

I would talk to my local dive shop to see if they know of anyone looking for a buddy who might compatible. I don't know where in MD you are but Lake Millbrook in Haymarket, VA runs fun dives almost every Sunday during the summer and you can find people there. Ultimately, you may want to look into getting solo certified, which pretty much takes care of the question for you in local diving. You dive when you have a buddy and solo when you don't.

 

[Uncle Pug]

I guess it's a bit like driving - everyone else is a bad driver 'cept us!

... attitude is what counts.

A good buddy team is more than one person and involves more than individual skills.

It isn't enough that I am a good buddy... or that I find someone who is a good buddy.

Finding someone that I can be a good buddy with is every bit as important as finding someone who will be a good buddy with me.

Without the teamwork mentality ~ attitude ~ it just won't happen. You can train for it in a class that super emphasizes teamwork diving, as with GUE's classes... but the underlying attitude has to be present for it to work.

A good buddy team can communicate with out communicating. They think alike, plan alike and perform alike.

How rare is that?

 

[Uncle Pug]

I have two buddies who are really great to dive with and that I would trust to end of the earth, but they both live out of state

The buddies that got me into diving 135 ft. routinely, etc. became instructors. Most of their local dive time is spent in pools and doing classes now.

My normal buddies for recreational diving (local) have gotten busy with life and don't have time anymore.

...and something we must all face:

They are perishable as well... no set expiration date but you can't always count on them being their for the rest of your diving career. So always be on the look out.

 

[Snowbear]

How rare is that?

I'm still relatively new at this diving stuff and even newer at the team diving stuff, but so far have only found 2 divers I would do any dive with, anywhere. One lives over 5000 miles away and unfortunately I'll probably never see or dive with him again. The other lives over 2000 miles away and hopefully I get to dive with him a couple trips a year.

I have, however, found several buddies I will do most dives with. Again unfortunately, only a couple of these are local to me. I'm working on it, though - I've contacted a few local divers through this board and every once in a while I stop by the LDS in Anchorage and "network." I've found a couple buddies this way. Hopefully one will turn out to be one of the rare ones?

 

[MyDiveLog]

Your message echoes exactly where I was at a few years back: a relatively competent and experienced AOW diver that was struggling to find competent dive buddies who were interested and able to dive as often as I wanted to.

The good news: A lot of things started happening within 6 months of my AOW certifications that solved the problem. Perhaps some will be of help to you:

1) I scanned the "buddy wanted" section of a local dive magazine that comes out monthly, contacting a buddy that sounded like he had similar interests and abilities. He ended up being a bit annoying 'above water' but, because of the ad, introduced me to two other divers that also joined us on a group dive trip to a local spot. These two divers had the same opinion of the guy ... and ended up becoming regular dive buddies of mine.

2) I took an extended warm water trip organized by a local dive shop ... it's amazing how a week straight of diving with a group can help you get to know folks (I knew no one other than my buddy before the trip) and their dive habits. A couple of divers from the trip also became regular dive buddies of mine, although I had to make the first few invitations.

3) I kept taking classes ... it seemed the more advanced they were (Rescue, Nitrox, and Master) the more the divers that took them with me were similar to my abilities, interests, and focus on safety. I've done over a hundred dives in the past year with three folks I met this way.

4) Join a dive club affiliated with your LDS, and attend meetings and local 'fun dives' regularly. Aside from helping me stay connected with other divers, it led me to become an officer of the club, which has given me more opportunities to dive with buddies than I can accomodate.

Common to these 4 was that I usually had to be the initiator of the first few dives with folks...and then they began seeking me out on a regular basis. I think this happened because I took buddying & safety very seriously, and it showed in my diving. It didn't hurt that I occasionally brought enough coffee and donuts to share ....

Finally: 5) I'm not sure if you are contemplating solo diving or not. For me, it was part of solving the dilemma of "great conditions / I have the time / no dive buddy." Solo diving is not for everyone, but I found that it really increased my focus and, ultimately, confidence. I researched it thoroughly, bought the redundant gear, and 'eased' into it at my own pace. While I prefer diving with a buddy, about 20% of my dives are solo these days.

Good luck

 

[sdbdrz]

GReat feedback guys, I really posted just to see if I was the only one that felt this way and to hopefully get some suggestions.

I am going to take some of you suggestions and continue with my original path. I am going to join the local dive club affiliate with my local dive shop and will probably sign up for a dive trip through the local shop. I am also fairly personable so I am sure I will talk to other locals of the summer at the quarries. Thanks again.

As for solo diving, not really interested in that at hte moment. I definately see the value in a good dive buddy and do not feel that I am experienced enough to undertake solo diving at this time.

Thanks foor the feedback

 

[sdbdrz]

Snowbear,

I have a large client in Anchorage and will be there the first week in August and for a couple weeks in November. Shoot me an email if you get a chance, I have a few questions I would like to ask you.