Bullied under water

[CT-Rich]

Don't worry Rich it's not about being pisssed-off it's about being bullied. Besides those suggestions were of the non-violent type for a female. When I've have been confronted by a bully my reaction has always been quick and intense violence.

Errrrr, okay Jordan.... that makes me feel much... better.....

 

[AfterDark]

Errrrr, okay Jordan.... that makes me feel much... better.....

It should make you feel better, because at least since I've known you, you haven't been a bully. So what's to worry about? You planning on changing? I hope not, you're a very big man!

I sent you a unrelated PM.

 

[captain]

Diving4ever, my response was really just a long winded version of saying, bullies bully because they get away with it. Don't allow yourself to be a victim, and you won't be bullied. Bully's prey on the weak and timid, not on the strong and spunky. It's not rhetoric when it's a proven fact. And I don't believe it is at all unhelpful

There is your answer. As a new freshman in high school the school bully came up to me wanting to fight. I said OK let's go, he turned and walked away.

 

[dalaimama]

One reason to place this discussion on the women's forum, is to increase the likelihood that it will get thoughtful and helpful responses.

This is my thoughtful, helpful, female response. Don't run away, don't be passive agressive, don't rely on your husband to come to your rescue, and don't stab him (although the urge is sometimes undeniable).

Sit him down, look him in the eye and say, "Look, if you've got a problem with the way I'm diving, talk to me about it. But the next time you touch me underwater, you and I? We're going to have a serious @#$% issue. Capice?"

 

[AfterDark]

This is my thoughtful, helpful, female response. Don't run away, don't be passive agressive, don't rely on your husband to come to your rescue, and don't stab him (although the urge is sometimes undeniable).

Sit him down, look him in the eye and say, "Look, if you've got a problem with the way I'm diving, talk to me about it. But the next time you touch me underwater, you and I? We're going to have a serious @#$% issue. Capice?"

That may work but it's the next time. What's he allowed one freebie? Someone manhandles another person especially underwater that action needs to be dealt with there on the spot. I was bullied when I was a kid I stopped it, know what works. Chatting may work up front before action is taken, once it is the time for talking has passed.

 

[DaleC]

Why is everyone trying to correct the other persons behavior?
This might be appropriate if two people have to co-exist in the same environment (school, work, organization) but this is a parking lot meet up with others to dive. It's a big ocean - go find some nice people to dive with. Problem solved.

Or.. You could break both your hands trying to beat sense into every fool you come across to prove that you can't be fooled with. It's been my experience that the fools keep on coming and all you end up with is sore hands. If you keep it up, people begin to think you're a fool for acting that way.

Here's the script for that
He: I'm going to change your behavior.
She: Oh no you aren't. I'm going to change yours.
He: No you're not. Me change you.
She: No. Me change you.
He: No. You change.
She: You.
He: You.
......................

 

[dalaimama]

Why is everyone trying to correct the other persons behavior?

Only his behaviour as it affects her. It's always worth a shot. I don't think it's unreasonable to have a chat with the @$$ and see where it goes. If it doesn't change his behaviour then find a new group, but retreat doesn't tend to be my opening move.

 

[DandyDon]

Only his behaviour as it affects her. It's always worth a shot. I don't think it's unreasonable to have a chat with the @$$ and see where it goes. If it doesn't change his behaviour then find a new group, but retreat doesn't tend to be my opening move.

Some people fight all of the fights presented to them, but some select the fights worth fighting. Your statement is fine in itself, but some posters here have been more interested in escalating the problem than resloving it. Sometimes the best effect you can hope for is "I've had enough for this ass - bye!"

 

[Rich Keller]

One good piece of advice my father gave me was to never argue with an idiot. He did not want someone watching that exchange to confuse him with the idiot. Given what the op had to say about this idiot it is not likely that she will be able to reason with him either. I would just stop diving with him.

 

[maderadiver]

One good piece of advice my father gave me was to never argue with an idiot. He did not want someone watching that exchange to confuse him with the idiot. Given what the op had to say about this idiot it is not likely that she will be able to reason with him either. I would just stop diving with him.

I belive the old saying is never argue with a idiot they'll drag you down to there level and beat you with experience