Yesterday was a bad day, Sorry and thank you guys for letting me get that out. Today started off worse. At 9AM I got a call from her mom. The hospital called and said her breathing was bad, O2 Sat dropping, and we better get up there. It is normally a 15 minute drive from work. I made it in 8. Not good considering the water in my eyes made it hard to see good except for the squiggly lines and stars floating in my peripheral vision. My BP was way up I knew it. When I got here she was in a very deep sleep and did not look very good. But her breathing had stabilized. Her nurse came in and told me he looked in and she did not look good and got worried. And called us. I started trying to wake her. Don't know if it was the shaking or the tears falling on her that woke her up.
But within about 15 minutes she was fully awake and focusing on me, her brother, and her mom. The doc came in and was talking about the attentiveness issues and calling in a neurologist. Was also ordering another CT scan of the brain to rule out a mini stroke or other anomaly. He also mentioned stopping her psych meds again. That is when it hit me. She was on a fairly heavy dose of antidepressants when she went in. they stopped em cold turkey before the surgery. Then started them up again. Then stopped em again. Then started em up again at very low dose. I have been through all of her issues with this and know that doing that is not good. I convinced him to not only keep them going but to bring them up closer to her original levels. They do not have a shrink on staff for consult and they are having trouble getting ahold of hers. He ordered the increase which she got at noon. By 3 PM she was still tired but woke up easier and was even more alert. I also talked to him today and I guess it really hit me how close she was to not being here. The Gall bladder, pnuemonia, feeding tube, and antibiotics she is getting now was pretty aggressive treatment as he explained. He also said that if we were not so aggressive it was very likely that we would not be having the conversation we were. By the time I left to go back to work I was a basket case.
Oh and hearing that 8 US Service members were killed today in Afghanistan on the radio on the way to the hospital didn't help either. My son is over there now.
I didn't get much work done and was pretty much left alone. I would do a little bit. go in the back bay, do what I had to do, get a hold of myself, do a little more. I was in such a dark place that I was expecting to be spending tonite at the hospital. Instead when I got here after work she was as I said doing even better! Talk about a world lifting from my shoulders. A solar system is still there but minus a planet.
Finally I got to do the feeding this evening. It made me feel better. The nurse supervised and we were done in 5 minutes. And I made an observation. 10 minutes or so after the feeding she was dozing and laying at about 35 degrees. Recommended is 30 min. So she was theoretically ok as as far as chance of choking. Well she began to have difficulty exactly like what scared the nurse. I raised the bed as I talked to her and she was fine. It makes sense. Even though she has been getting fed via the tube it was on a pump over a long time. We just started the BOLUS yesterday. A very good chance that filling her stomach faster may make breathing difficult until she gets used to it and we need to be more upright. And her stomach was small to begin with thanks to the enlarged gall bladder pressing on it and her not being able to eat much. So many issues and it does take everyone helping and perhaps even more important observing and taking note of what is going on. I'm in a better place tonite. Thanks to everyone. Ph and she'd kill me if she knew I revealed it but I am staying at the hospital tomorrow night and every night this weekend. They have an extra bed in the room for me. When the neurologist came in with her night nurse I told them what she said about me staying. That she'd like that and maybe we could fool around being that it is New Years eve! They gave her a look at that I'll tell ya. Thanks again for all your support. It is not over yet by a long shot. But maybe we have just won another small battle.
I wanted to let you all know this new stuff. You have been a big part of keeping us going. Good night I need to try and get some sleep. Didn't do so good last night. I'm exhausted. Jim
