Non-diving spouses

[Calle Roo]

Trade her in.

I dive, and don't mind Carribean vacations for the holidays. -wink wink nudge nudge-

 

[diver 85]

sounds like you missed out on a good one a couple back----

 

[Big Toes]

Thanks for the great feedback boys and girls. Sounds like most of you have been able to work compromises, which is awesome. I think that i'm pretty flexible and more than willing to do different types of trips at different times of year, so this is really baffling me. maybe i'll post a follow-up here, especially if it turns out to be a dramatic saga

 

[miked]

I have a non diving SO, for going on 30 years.
She is not really a beach person,(she'll go to the beach at most 1 or 2 days -for a few hoursin the week when we travel) but she likes the pool-if it is in the shade
Unlike your described GF, she does enjoy the warmer places-as long as there are shops with AC to cool off-she doesn't do well in the heat.

She, thank God, knows how I love diving, and that local diving is no longer an option. As such, we go to places like Bermuda, Nassau, Aruba, Cozumel, where I can dive, she can do her thing, (shopping, sight seeing safely, a little pool sitting/relaxing,etc.) and WE can be together for most evenings/ nights.
If you can find places that have the warm water you need, and the sights she wants to see, then you' have a solution. if not?????

good luck!
Mike

 

[Hockeynut]

Tag yourselves on to another friend/relatives's trip.

"Oh, your sister is going to Cozumel for a week to bake her leathery skin some more? Why don't we go with her? You two need to spend more time together."

Or plan a group trip from the ground up. Invite the friend of hers that you hate. They'll have fun while you can go dive. Invite lots of her friends and she won't even know how often you disappear. You look like a hero for putting it all together.

Don't invite Hockeynut.

I still think my idea was better.

 

[lifes an ocean]

Okay stupid question, you are dating a girl who holds no interest in an activity you are really into. At least enough into that you can't bare to be away for a few weeks to take a trip to europe with her. What do you like about this girl enough that you are still with her if she has absolutely no interest in a hobby that holds so much of yours? A relationship is about comprimise, so figure a way to comprimise. If everytime she brings up an idea to get away on a non-diving trip and you want to find a way to get out of it...I say find a new girl who shares your interests.

 

[DiverLS]

I'm lucky - I have a BF that really supports me in my diving. He's proud that I'm going to Egypt in THREE DAYS. And I'm happy he enjoys hunting with a "I'll be back when I get it (the deer, the elk, the antelope, the turkey). I also drive all by myself to S. Calif to go out on the liveaboards. He is happy that I'm happy, I'm happy that he is happy. Wonderful life.

I sure hope Big Toes can find someone like that, or his current GF understands him.

But - when I don't work 40 hrs a week, I can be the cook when he goes hunting and he is OW certified, maybe?

 

[trucker girl]

no good can come from it if there is zero compromise so if diving is really important to you and unless you can agree to seperate holidays i say put a fork in it now and end the relationship

tough words i know but my PC mode is turned off today

goodluck

Ditto. My husband doesn't dive (I found diving 7 years after we got married) and we often take separate vacations. I also have a whole group of dive buddy friends that he doesn't know- he met Notso_Ken and his wife once but that's it. It would be better if we both dove, but he won't do it and has no interest. Sometimes he has to deal with the fact that I'm going diving. Sometimes I have to deal with the fact that I will have to give up some diving I'd hoped to do. C'est la vie.

 

[bbianchi]

Just remember, there are plenty of fish in the sea!

You have to be able to compromise to a point where everyone is happy MOST of the time.

 

[White Knight]

My wife doesn't dive and is afraid of the water. I use the SCUBA time as my time away. She has her time away too. We try to find common ground. But it can be a deal breaker if a happy medium can't be found. All I can say, if the woman doesn't dive, she better "really" be good at "other" things....I mean "really" good.