You do the Valsalva maneuver in an elevator.
The words "crotch strap" don't make you cringe.
You proudly display items that would normally be found in a junkyard.
You talk about peeing on yourself and aren't embarrassed.
Most of the books on your shelf are in Latin.
You get excited when you can see for twenty feet.
Your favorite color is black.
You get that same feeling when you receive a Performance Diver catalogue as you did when you were a kid looking in a toy store.
You think nothing of strapping a hundred pounds of gear on your back and hiking to the water, yet wouldn't think of backpacking with a pack heavier than 35 pounds.
You found another use for KY Jelly.
You use terms like zipper lube.
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