Corrupt-a-Wish

[SeaHorse81]

Granted, and it even comes with a convenient flat rate of $50/minute to anywhere in the world, at any time.


I wish my kitties would stop waking me up three hours before I need to get up in the morning.

 

[cdolphin]

Granted, they wake you at four hours before you need to get up. And you can't go back to sleep.

Wish I could eat real ice cream every day without gaining weight.

 

[apadua]

Granted, but the only allowed flavor is Garlic.

Wish I finished everything i start.

 

[SeaHorse81]

Granted, but unfortunately, you don't enjoy anything you start.

I wish I could spend a whole week doing blue-water dives; don't care if any critters even come by.

 

[cdolphin]

Granted, you now have a week pass to the YMCA pool - grab your gear.

Wish I could find a way to make money that was fun.

 

[SeaHorse81]

Granted, you love your job running a printing press for the U.S. Treasury. The creative humor in the Treasury Department never ceases to amaze you, which helps to compensate for the low salary.


I wish I could afford good health insurance.

 

[cdolphin]

Granted. The day it becomes effective, you die. (I know, harsh.)

Wish I had a clean house already.

 

[SeaHorse81]

Back from the dead and surprisingly free of resentment, I grant your wish. Someone came in to clean your house as a surprise while you were away today. Unfortunately, one of the crew tripped on a throw rug and is now suing you.

I wish I didn't need a 7mm (yes, you read that right) suit to dive in the Caribbean. I wish I didn't need the 5mm hood either.

 

[cdolphin]

Granted. Since the Caribbean is chilly, I think it is time to invest in the drysuit. White's Fusion. Only $3800 + extras . Enjoy.

Wish I knew a lawyer. Wait. I don't have any throw rugs. Insurance Scam!!

 

[SeaHorse81]

Nonetheless, you've been contacted by the scamming house-cleaning person's attorney. Now you know a lawyer.

I wish my Honda would last forever.