I'm such an idiot!

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It’s a good policy but you can do this because you are staff.

You cannot just touch other people equipment in a random place, some will get angry at you, whether it makes sense or not, and … it’s not yours …
I disagree - it’s a potential safety hazard, so I would have no issue laying someone’s rig down if they left it in an unsafe position in a public area near other people. I highly doubt anyone would get angry at that kind of intervention but, if they did, screw them - I really wouldn't care!
 
Where I do most of my technical diving, we have one of those benches set up for double tanks, too. When it was first built, it was pretty sturdy, but it has loosened up over the years. Consequently, we have had more than one incident like the one you describe. That has led to a standard policy of using bungee cord to lash the manifold to the top crossbar. That has then led to the common problem of the diver getting fully kitted up and then trying to stand, at which point they have to ask someone to come over and undo the bungee.

I have grown wary of all of that, and I now do it all from the back of my van.
 
You'd be surprised how many times in my career a customer sent in a 'defective' valve or first stage that wouldn't seal properly. Generally, they look ok, but when you remove the yoke from the first stage and stand in on its inlet orifice, you notice it doesn't stand completely straight up. A yoke valve might look ok until you put a straight edge across the outlet and detect a slight warp. On DIN valves, instead of perfectly round outlet orifice, you can detect a slight football shape.

A passing look seems like everything is normal but once I ask a few questions, we do get a story just like yours. Then the direction of the subtle deformation lines up with a corresponding ding on top of the valve and it's obvious what happened.

It's happened to me and others I know but it only happens once. It's an expensive lesson.
 
Was on a boat when a SM diver failed to secure his tanks to the rail at their station, back underway boat rocked a little bit and tanks (and valves) came off the dive bench, rolled between the twin dive ladders and splashed. We circled back but tanks + air + valves were negative enough they were still negative, so were donated to the davy jones sidemount dive club.
 
Don't they object to you driving your van on the boat?
I was speaking of the dive site where I do most of my diving, and, as I indicated, it is shore based and has the structure I described for double tanks.
 
I'd be pretty pissed if a random diver that just happened to be there started laying tanks down🤣.. could you imagine a guy (or gal) walking around the quarry just laying everyone's tanks down, lol.. wouldn't happen very long before he touched the wrong guys stuff!!
I once left my gear assembled and standing upright in the middle of a large, absolutely flat, gravel-covered area -- I wanted it to dry in the breeze and sun -- but some guy kept persisting in laying down my gear every time I turned my back. I was soooooo mad...
 
On DIN valves, instead of perfectly round outlet orifice, you can detect a slight football shape.
I have seen that happen on DIN valves. I have even seen it happen to DIN valves in cases where people slid a tink into the valve of another tank on the floor of a truck. A DIN valve can go out of round surprisingly easily.

In every case I have seen, we were able to fix it by using a stainless steel DIN plug and a big wrench to retap the opening. Sometimes it takes 4-5 times to get it back to normal.
 
I once left my gear assembled and standing upright in the middle of a large, absolutely flat, gravel-covered area -- I wanted it to dry in the breeze and sun -- but some guy kept persisting in laying down my gear every time I turned my back. I was soooooo mad...
Pssshh I found him

Pshhh @Joneill
 

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