My dive buddy startles me.

[Jim Lapenta]

From the time I was certed I did not have a regular dive buddy. Now that I have someone who is a diver, and a good one at that, I like the little touches and glances she gives me and I give her. What exactly is she trying to do when she grabs you? Slow you down, get your attention, or just looking for a little reassurance? In any case it would not hurt you to do as the others have said and talk to her. Why do you not want her grabbing you? Is it really endangering your safety or is it simply annoying? I would advise you touching her once in awhile in a reassuring or affectionate manner. What kind of plans are you diving? Who is making them? You both should be.

I have a little bit more experience than my girlfriend and a few more certs. So when the vis gets low I expect her to take my hand or arm and stay close. I do lead the dives so far but she is always no more than a 1/4 turn of the head for me to see. Where is your wife? Do you know at all times? You should. I have a few exercises I do that work very well with couples and communicating underwater. They even have, so I'm told, improve surface communication in general. One even uncovered a strength that they did not realize was there and gave the husband a new appreciation for his wife's abilities and his own limitations. I'd bet if I did a couple dives with you both, I could reproduce similar results if both of you had open minds.

 

[LeadTurn_SD]

Well my dive buddy AKA " My Wife" keeps grabbing my BC, hands, tank ect. while underwater. I have pushed her away a time or two because she startles me & I can't move or keep us both neutrally buoyant. I can't tell if she just doesn't want to get lost or if she is having a problem or maybe she just wants to be with her hubby, I don't know. That has been her reasoning in the past. Is it rude of me to not want to be hung on while trying not to drown? Has anyone ever had this problem?

1. Hold hands. No pushing and no shoving please

2. Swim side by side. Did I mention holding hands? This is a good way to get used to swimming close together. My wife and I often link arms as we cruise along the reef.

3. Work on your own comfort level. Unless your wife is grabbing your regulator hose and mask, or otherwise mauling you, you should not be "trying not to drown".

4. Both of you should work on buoyancy control. If you are both neutral, having her "grab" you should have no effect on your buoyancy. If she is grabbing you because she is sinking or floating away, that needs to be fixed.

5. This really should have been number one: Talk to her. Decide pre-dive how you want the dive to go, how close you will be swimming, how she can get your attention without "grabbing" you.

Best wishes.

 

[fnfalman]

Whip out your big ass dive knife and give her a little poke or two. She'll get the message.

 

[Jim Lapenta]

Whip out your big ass dive knife and give her a little poke or two. She'll get the message.

Let me guess, you and idocsteve pick up chicks together and use similar lines?

 

[F106A]

With no input from her I'd say it's possible she's diving only because you dive, she's scared to death and on the verge of panic every second underwater but wants to be supportive(?) and involved in your hobbies, and would thank her lucky stars if you were to give the sport up. But that's just a guess. (And I'd also say she probably cares for you deeply and greatly values your marriage.)

 

[79scubasteve]

Thanks for your input. My wife actually likes to dive more than I. I think she grabs me more out of wanting to play, or wants me to show her attention. Our last dive she grabbed my arms and wanted a kiss. I guess I am the one that is more concerned about where I am, whats there to see, whats going on, whats happening, how much air I have left, instead of playing. I feel out of control when I am being held on to. Maybe I should loosen up a little.

 

[Jim Lapenta]

Diving is supposed to be fun. Yes serious fun, but fun. Relax and as long as it doesn't risk safety give her a little affection. You can still monitor your air and look around. Who else ya gonna give some lovin to? That big ol catfish?

 

[FritzCat66]

Ditch the wife.

Dive solo.

Live solo.

Be free.

Be happy.

 

[Doc Harry]

I really love it when my GF grabs me underwater.

 

[Blackwood]

Let me guess, you and idocsteve pick up chicks together and use similar lines?

I'd love to see the threeway swordfight between those two and PapaBear.