Group Travel: Points of Contention

[Steve_Dives]

...Christmas feet...

What are Christmas feet?

 

[Steve_Dives]

http://www.laraines.com/covandbod.html

Well I visited the site, purely for research purposes, and they also carry shirts for dudes - both flattering and unflattering.

 

[trucker girl]

Hello... Food coloring? Red and green? Christmas? Booties? Feet? Christmas feet?

Are you color blind?

 

[1_T_Submariner]

Red and Green = Port and Stardboard

Pretty funny stories all. I went on one trip that was all guys. It was ok since we all did our own thing most of the time in smaller groups got together on Saturday night for dinner though.

 

[Doc]

I don't like Hummers either.

Probably never had one that was in tune, that's all. Just find a better Hummer technician.

port, starboard

Pointy end, the other end. Gawd, I love nautical talk. It's so... salty.

1T? Greetings from the ELFin circle, South of Clam Lake, WI.

T-AG-193, Jennifer- out.

 

[nereas]

ive never been on a drive trip with a group - hubby and i have always done our trips on our own but ive always found the group thing funny

last dive trip i saw an alpha male with his lds newbies and they wouldnt even eat breakfast unless he joined them or put their gear together until he said they could

i would need at least SOME independance if in a group - but i will find out what its like next year when we do Solomans

The most independence comes when you join a live-aboard on your own. And if everyone on the boat does this, then everyone tends to be very independent. Occasionally the boat captain will ask, where does everyone want to dive next? That is about the only group interaction, when that happens, other than meals, and stories after diving.

The lease independence is when you join a group to travel and dive together. Normally there is an alpha in that group, and a beta, and also an omega-trouble-maker, and a couple of cliques at least.

In either case, you can stay above the fray, but it requires experience to do so. You need to avoid giving or listening to criticism, use the tactic of changing the subject a lot, never speak about local or national politics, and always be nice to everyone. This is a type of people skill, very useful for dive trips.

The most important thing is to avoid the temptation to give advice. Even if someone asks for advice, it is better simply to outline the various choices, and let the person make up their own mind. In a group setting, by trying to give advice you are trying to set yourself up as an alpha. The others will naturally revolt, and turn you into an omega.

There have been a lot of Greek letters used in this discussion! For those of you not familiar with the Greek alphabet (al-FA-ve-to), here it is, for fun:

al' fa
vee' ta
rhah' ma
thel' ta

ehp' si lon
zee' ta
ee' ta
thee' ta

yio' ta
kap' pa
lam' tha
mee

nee
ksee
oh' mi cron
pee

rho
sig' ma
taf
eep' si lon

fee
hee
psee
oh meg' ra

If you remember them in groups of 4, it is easier. Note that the modern pronunciation is not the same as what you learned in your math classes in school.

It is better not to be an alpha, beta, nor omega in any group. There is more security in the middle of the herd.

The Hummer question is a fascinating example of how to deal with a situation with perplexities. In situations like this, you often need to consider the needs of the group above your own needs. The group needs transportation. The Hummer may be the best transportation for the given terrain. But you may personally despise these gas guzzing war wagons. Your need in this situation is a need for meaningful protest. Their need is the need for transportation. It is a logical issue versus an emotional issue. Those kind of issues are never easy to resolve.

 

[Teamcasa]

... , you can stay above the fray, but it requires experience to do so. You need to avoid giving or listening to criticism, use the tactic of changing the subject a lot, never speak about local or national politics, and always be nice to everyone. This is a type of people skill, very useful for dive trips.

The most important thing is to avoid the temptation to give advice. Even if someone asks for advice, it is better simply to outline the various choices, and let the person make up their own mind. In a group setting, by trying to give advice you are trying to set yourself up as an alpha. The others will naturally revolt, and turn you into an omega.

This is good advice! Thanks.

Dave

 

[nereas]

This is good advice! Thanks.

Dave

Those are your CHOICES! Not "advice"!

 

[Teamcasa]

Those are your CHOICES! Not "advice"!

I'd advise others to make those choices!

Dave

 

[merxlin]

In either case, you can stay above the fray, but it requires experience to do so. You need to avoid giving or listening to criticism, use the tactic of changing the subject a lot, never speak about local or national politics, and always be nice to everyone. This is a type of people skill, very useful for dive trips.

The most important thing is to avoid the temptation to give advice. Even if someone asks for advice, it is better simply to outline the various choices, and let the person make up their own mind. In a group setting, by trying to give advice you are trying to set yourself up as an alpha. The others will naturally revolt, and turn you into an omega.

Oh, now where is the fun in this? I say be critical, be supportive, be whatever, but be yourself! For me, nothing will make a week nothing but hell more than walking on eggshells the whole time. There is nothing wrong with asking for what you want, provided you do so with a little tact. It is possible to give advice without sounding like a pompous zealot. It's even possible to discuss politics, sports, even women if you can have a discussion and not just make it an opportunity to try and change someone else's beliefs. A little common courtesy, some manners, and a bit of respect for your fellow travelers brought by you will yield more benefits to you than bringing grief and drama. Then when you need to ask for what you want or need to do your own thing, you won't be the be-atch. JMHO.