Pool Pervert!!!

[Wayward Son]

It is a subjective problem. You haven't described anything that really qualifies as an offense.

If someone came to my attention in such a way I'd keep an eye on him to see what what happening, but looking isn't illegal. So long as he stayed in his own lane & kept his hands to himself, he hasn't really crossed any boundaries.

 

[annie]

>>Am I the only one who finds this social self policing disturbing ? <<

If someone noticed a sleazy guy perving on me I hope they would point it out before he follows me home.
There's a massive difference between these type of guys and normal guys. Creepy sleazebags are dangerous IMO and if they're noticed in a pool, you should point it out to either the lifeguard or the lady (maybe the lifeguard if you're not 100% sure). If they're harmless, they should learn not to inadvertently act like a sleaze and frighten people. It's not nice and might embarrass people but unfortunately there are dangerous people around.

 

[grazie42]

Sounds subjective to me...
I think the "how would you feel if something bad happend"/"better safe than sorry" line of thinking is very dangerous because it can be used to justify just about anything and its a slippery slope I think most people would do well to stay away from...

Just think if it was you who were accused of something like that? would you want to go back to that pool? That couldn&#180;t happen because you dont "perv"? Well better safe than sorry right?

There are laws and clear definitions of what constitutes a crime, the world would be a better place if people were content to be guided by them...

 

[plankspanker]

I think intuition is a great resource and one would be foolish to ignore it.

It doesn't necessarily mean you need to do something everytime your alarm bells go off, you still need to make the choice, but a little social control isn't always a bad thing.

Frankly, I'd rather warn someone about something and be wrong than to live with the thought that I could have warned them and didn't if they end up getting hurt or whatever when I saw it coming.... I'm just not cold enough to let that happen.

R..

yes social control is a very bad thing if it involves accusing someone over being a pervert because your intuition told you so. Intuition is a great personal resource but you have to be realistic when you are using it like a super power to stop thought crimes. "my spidey senses are tingling, I'll bet that guy is thinking sexual thoughts about that girl" ..20 seconds later.. "my spidey senses are tingling, I'll bet that other guy is thinking sexual thoughts about that girl" repeat about a thousand times until you notice a pattern.

but wait this guy was different right? he was creepy and we all know that there is a very clear definition on what creepy is and we are all taught what that is and no personal prejudices are brought into at all, right? I personally think that all white males between 35 and 50 are all potential serial murderers so whenever I see one I make sure to keep my eyes out for suspicious behavior and rarely am I let down. When I make my accusations they usually get mad and leave thus proving their guilt. The world just doesn't appreciate my efforts though to save them from these creeps.

Subtly warning someone of potential danger isn't a bad idea but this situation in the pool sounded blown out of proportion from what was posted.

P.S. I am a white male between 35 and 50 and I am creepy as hell. Just thought I would throw that out there for informational purposes and so everyone can judge me based on what they think they know.

 

[annie]

>>Intuition is a great personal resource but you have to be realistic when you are using it like a super power to stop thought crimes.<<

>> I personally think that all white males between 35 and 50 are all potential serial murderers so whenever I see one I make sure to keep my eyes out for suspicious behavior and rarely am I let down.<<

To be honest I am presuming we are talking about intuition used realistically and not in a way as described above. We're talking common sense. Never a bad thing surely. Keeping an eye out for potential danger is a basic survival instinct not the preserve of the paranoid. It's also very important for children to learn. Sad but true.

OP asked the question, if you notice this what should you do. Again, common sense dictates. Are you near the lady. Nearer the lifeguard? Be subtle about it if you're not 100% sure.

 

[NYPI]

What would you do?

I was working out at the pool today. The guy sharing my lane had a new snorkel kit. It looked like something you might pick at a discount sporting goods store.

I didn't notice this guy too much until the couple in the next lane asked if I thought he was checking them out... They thought he was acting creepy. They left the pool shortly after and another girl jumped in their lane.

Now my workout was distracted, I was keeping an eye on the guy and he "was" acting really creepy obviously checking out this girl as she swam. Timing his laps so he could shadow her.

I was getting really pissed off about this and wondering what to do about it. I felt like knocking his mask off and introducing him to the bottom of the pool! I stopped him at the end of the pool and had a brief disscusion with him. He denied the whole thing and the conversation got a bit heated. He left the pool shortly after.

My question to all of you is simply: "What would you do"? And to the ladies out there, what would you like someone to do if they noticed a pervert shadowing you durring your pool work out? And finally, has this ever happened to anyone else?

I'm going to try to make a poll here...

Creepy guy story:

I was at the pool the other day and trying out a new mask and snorkel I picked up for my vacation next week. As I am swimming I noticed these two fat people in the lane next to me. People like that shouldn't be allowed to swim in public. Then I noticed this guy swimming next to me. Did he have to swim in my lane? Oh man every time I pass him he's looking at me. I feel uncomfortable but to each his own. Maybe I will look at that cute chick in the lane next to me and this guy will get the hint that I don't roll that way. And so on...

As you can see thing may get confused. As long as this guy wasn't grabbing or making unwarranted remarks who cares unless you are the pool police.

If looking at a woman is socially unacceptable then I want to unaccepted. What about women looking at other women should I get the stake and some wood? I find it creepier that a guy doesn’t notice a pretty girl…
JMTC

 

[hvulin]

we are all just humans....

I would have to be very sick to just ignore a nice girl in the same (or any other) lane but I don't think I'm a pervert because of it... What is she doing there, beeing so pretty and in just this small bathing suit????

 

[johnnyseko]

Let the girl take care of herself...if then it becomes an 'issue' step in and intro him to the bottom of the pool.

 

[ShoalDiverSA]

yes social control is a very bad thing if it involves accusing someone over being a pervert because your intuition told you so. Intuition is a great personal resource but you have to be realistic when you are using it like a super power to stop thought crimes. "my spidey senses are tingling, I'll bet that guy is thinking sexual thoughts about that girl" ..20 seconds later.. "my spidey senses are tingling, I'll bet that other guy is thinking sexual thoughts about that girl" repeat about a thousand times until you notice a pattern.
...

I have a "situation" happening right now where the father of one of my daughter's friends is being suspected of "fiddling" with one of the kids in my daughter's playgroup based upon these two "facts":

1) He works shifts and is at home some of the days that the kids go over there for playgroup (note that he is not alone with the children)

2) One of the mothers feel that something is awry.

Well, my wife and I don't feel that something is out of kilter - who is right?

We have questioned my daughter very carefully and from her answers we are confident that there is nothing going on. By the way, these kids are round about 3 years old, hence the difficulty in getting straight answers. I would gladly remove the body parts of this man if I had one shadow of a doubt about this matter. But I don't.

When these concerns were raised, we decided to have the playgroup at our house every time - a precautionary measure. I would hate to explaining to my daughter one day that her innocence was destroyed due to my inaction. In hindsight, I suppose it would have been better to avoid this scenario entirely by having the playgoup on "neutral" ground from the beginning.

The couple in question are in the process of emigrating to another country - imagine what being put on a paedophile watchlist is going to do to those plans... I would hate to be "convicted" based upon the two items of evidence I gave above.

So while I agree that intuition counts for something, it can also be ludicrously dangerous. We live in a pretty sick world where we have to worry about issues like this. This in itself tends to lead to a biased view when such issues are discussed. Some people will swing right across to the "guilty" verdict based upon nothing.

Andrew

 

[Gidds]

Ok Boys this is exactly why I carry pepper spray and I'm not shy about using it. If you truely thought he was being predatory you should have discreetly informed the young lady especially if you thought she was a minor. I get leered at all the time at dive sites and I have pepper spray in reach at all times that my buddy (usually male) is not by my side. Leer all you like but don't come within spray range if you know what's good for you. Don't even think about filing an assault charge on me either if you insist on undressing me with your eyes for an hour then you come skulking up and startle me and get sprayed. It's my word against yours and the hysterical female will probably win. Anyway back to the young lady in question; she can probably take care of herself if she is discreetly informed and she can tell management or some other authority if she feels the need and she can also be on her gaurd in case super perv is waiting and lurking after she comes out of the lockeroom and goes to her car.