From my perspective, if I were assisting
@TMHeimer, I would divide the process into 3 steps.
STEP 1 The Descent.
For the first dive of the day you exposure suit is dry and nicely buoyant so in the water you need to flood it or burp the air out. Also you need to consider the initial shock of rolling in to cold water. We are used to it momentarily taking our breath away, but what's not recognised is that our diaphragm drops increasing our lung volume. Thus until we relax we are even more buoyant. If we have problems descending this again causes our lungs to expand as we're not in a relaxed state
What I would encourage Tom to do would be to wait on the surface and compose himself and then test his descent. You want only enough weight with a
full tank that a full exhale allows you to sink. Just press the inflator and descend (or try to) in a vertical manner, at least for the first 3 feet. I personally move to horizontal at 3 feet and carry on the descent. Once you can manage this, at say 6-10' take a big inhale, you should be able to stop your descent but not shoot to the surface.
This should get you a maximum weighting you need. Remember that you'll be probably ingrained and have adapted yoru technique to account for lots of weight.
STEP 2 - 15' SS
Get your self to 15' with 500psi in the vertical position i (for ease of dumping air) and deflate your BCD holding a normal breath if you start descending take a bit of weight off. Don't fin (cross your feet) or get agitated otherwise your diaphragm will drop again causing increase lung volume. Repeat as necessary. Ideally you should have a little bit of air in your BCD no more than a couple of lbs at the SS just to give you some leaway (if you're not relaxed for instance and still need to hold the SS)
To "visualise" a normal breath, think of your lungs as a car fuel tank. Normal breathing is between 1/4 full and 3/4 full leaving 1/4 in reserve at either end for adjustments. so you want to hold your breath at the 1/2 full position. When at home try to visualise the position of your chest during normal breathing - as divers we tend to over exaggerate breathing underwater.
STEP 3
Keep analysing your weight on every dive. Ask yourself if you are feeling too heavy? As you become more practiced and comfortable with the adjustment I assure you a little more lead will come off.
The final steps to be only carried out with a friend is to get your tank to 250-300 psi and check you can hold t he stop (the friend should have air. When mentoring I tend to drain the persons tank and let them breath off my long hose so there is no chance of them running out of air. You just want to ensure you can still hold a stop at this level.
My weighting is without a pony, I don't bother adjusting for a pony, because I want to ensure I can hold a stop with it empty, and a few lbs of extra weight doesn't bother me. The same with any other kit. all weighting without hit as I want to know I can hold a safety stop with the bare minimum rig.