A sad story what are your views?

[alcina]

There's so much going on in this discussion...great to see people thinking and sharing!

A little clean-up on my end

Don't you possibly mean THEY change their mind?

No, I meant HE as written. I did make the assumption that if the woman went through the hassle of going to court that she did in fact want to attempt to have a child. You are correct, I do not know that, but I did use that supposition as a basis for my statement. I apologise if there was confusion.

I don't pretend to have the answers, nor do I actually have a hard and fast position on any of these topics. I merely put out some thoughts...they may help, they may inflame, they may be dismissed...

 

[alcina]

f they felt that way they should have found a serrogate mother and had their babies then and there.

Just another morsel for thought...I am not sure that going through any kind of pregnancy when one is sick as a dog from chemo (as this woman presumably was as it is the reason for saving the embryos in the first place) and other cancer treatments is the best time. Makes much more sense to me to wait until each parent can devote some resources (time, energy, money et al) to a new baby. Going through cancer treatment is not easy for any involved.

 

[lostinspace]

I don't even want to empathize with it.
You can drag around as much baggage as you want.
She can't have a baby.
Deal with it.

God forbid that you lose your two natural born children.
I would hate to have someone say "deal with it" to your wife. Would you say it to your wife? "Hey honey we've lost our kids, deal with it".
No? I would hope not!

This poor woman's feeling of loss is very real.
However, that doesn't mean she is entitled to force a man to become a father against his will.
But without empathy to her situation, where is our humanity?

 

[lostinspace]

oh, just for info about the surrogacy issue - it's not actually legal in a lot of countries.

 

[Keysdrifter454]

If it is not alive, even if frozen, what makes it come back alive when thawed and implanted? It has to be alive because no Doctor, Scientist can give life to an inanimate object. (monty b)

Like an acorn, for instance?

Or a Chia Pet?

 

[TekDiveGirl]

If it is not alive, even if frozen, what makes it come back alive when thawed and implanted? It has to be alive because no Doctor, Scientist can give life to an inanimate object.

It has the potential to be alive. And I guess it is better put that it is more in a state of suspended animation. If it is not handled just correctly and thawed just so and implanted in a woman it will die. You can't just thaw it on the countertop and you will have a baby. Even with all done properly - there is no guarantee you will end up with a healthy baby.

Yes they are, I often smile when I hear arguments about when life begins - at birth or conception. Because when you come right down to it life dosent begin, it began. One time. At no time in the procreative process are we dealing with something that isn't alive. The mother is alive, the father is alive, the egg is alive and the sperm is alive and the tiny life is alive.

This is true - every cell in our bodies is alive from your blood cells to your now dead skin cells which you slough off on a daily baisis. For the case of this discusion I won't even go there as I don't feel it is truly relevant.

Kimber

 

[TekDiveGirl]

oh, just for info about the surrogacy issue - it's not actually legal in a lot of countries.

Really?

I had no idea, but I have never studied the laws on this because it hold no relevency in my life.

Kimber

 

[Keysdrifter454]

But without empathy to her situation, where is our humanity?

There's a difference between empathy and enabling.

Nothing's gonna change her situation, whether she bathes herself in grief for a week, or a year.

Or a decade.

If she chooses to be in pain forever, it's a choice.

With regard to the thread, this womans' morbid persistance is probably an indication of why she's husbandless to begin with.

She wants a kid, there are plenty to choose from, and a lot better the world will be for it.

 

[TekDiveGirl]

There's so much going on in this discussion...great to see people thinking and sharing!

Absolutely! I hope people don't start flaming and screw it up thusly have the topic closed! Its pretty cool to discuss and think about. Good topic!

Kimber

 

[procyon]

Quote:
Originally Posted by lostinspace
oh, just for info about the surrogacy issue - it's not actually legal in a lot of countries.

Really?

I had no idea, but I have never studied the laws on this because it hold no relevency in my life.

This may surprise you but Canada is one of those countries.

As to the subject at hand, I have to say I'm of the group that feels that the man should not be forced to be a father. As someone who will never have children I obviously empathize with the woman but I don't feel she has the right to force her ex into fatherhood.

I won't go into my opinions on parenthood and other related items because I don't feel any of that is relevant.

One might consider though that the original decision to freeze the embryos was made under duress. That and the fact that the couple are no longer together bear heavily on the case.